#280: Communicating With Teens—How Talking & Listening Help You Both – Alice Shikina

Drawing on her two decades of experience in theatre and conflict resolution, Alice offers eye-opening insights for fostering connection over control, using negotiation to build life skills, and showing up with curiosity instead of judgment.From funny anecdotes about coconut popsicles to powerful techniques based on Marshall Rosenberg’s Nonviolent Communication framework, Alice reminds us that great communication begins with listening—whether you’re talking to your teen, your Toastmasters club members, or your colleagues.We also touch on her new book, Don't Sleep on the Couch – Negotiating with Your Spouse, and her podcast Negotiation with Alice.Whether you're a parent, a mentor, or simply someone who wants to communicate better, this episode is packed with tools you can use today.Listen now and discover:The “two-choice” technique that diffuses argumentsHow to open up authentic conversations without forcing themWhy negotiating with your kids today sets them up for lifeWhat NOT to say when your teen says, “I hate my math teacher”Why showing your own vulnerability is a strength, not a weaknessYou can read Alice's article: Tips for Communicating With Your Teen, Using effective talking and listening skills benefits both of you, in the May 2025 Issue of the Toastmasters Magazine.Alice Shikina is a mediator and negotiation/communication coach who handles divorces, workplace, and family conflicts. She draws on two decades of theater training in acting and directing to enhance her mediation work.Some may remember Alice from the 100th anniversary Toastmasters International Convention, where she presented on conflict resolution. In June 2025, she received the Peacemaker Award from Community Boards in San Francisco for her work in mediation and conflict resolution.She’s the author of Negotiating with Your Kids and is currently writing her second book, Don't Sleep on the Couch – Negotiating with Your Spouse. In her free time, she rows with a team and plays violin in a community orchestra.Alice lives in Oakland, CA and can be reached at https://shikinanegotiationacademy.com/