29. Too Scared To Be Seen - Vulnerability, Rejection Sensitivity & Hiding Your True Self

Ever felt too scared to be seen - like longing for connection but the moment someone actually looks at you, you want to disappear?Yeah. Us too.In this episode of Too Much Apparently, we (Carly and Alice — two therapists and recovering perfectionists with squishy brains) get real about vulnerability, being perceived, and why letting people truly see you can feel more like a threat than a gift — even when you desperately want it.We unpack our own resistance, spiral in real-time, and share what it's like to want connection while also wanting the ground to swallow you whole.This time we talked about:🎙️ We've felt this thing too (and we still do): Hello rescheduling this episode because it felt too vulnerable to record, singing perfectly alone and freezing the moment someone watches, and sharing something honest then immediately wanting to delete it👀 What it looks like in real life: Avoiding eye contact, clamming up when eyes are on you, hiding from people after a moment of "too much," and post-socialising rumination that goes on way too long🧠 Why our brains do it: Relational trauma and rejection experiences that taught us being seen is dangerous, internalised shame from critical or dismissive environments, and a nervous system that learned to protect you — even when you don't want it to🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏻 The different ways it shows up: Performance anxiety, hypervigilance to facial expressions and tone, grey-tinted glasses that find danger even when it isn't there, and quietly making your world smaller and smaller🧰 Coping mechanisms: The "I am only acceptable when..." exercise to uncover your hidden rules, setting non-argumentative internal limits with your inner critic, building your compassionate voice alongside the critical one, and finding the people and spaces where it actually feels safe to try🌱 How to make peace with it: Start with the lower-risk moments — one small, honest thing at a time — because being seen isn't something you leap into, it's something you practise slowly.Thanks for listening           💛💜🩷🩵🧡💬 New episodes every Monday.🎧 Follow now to join the conversation.🧡 CONNECT WITH US 🎙️ Podcast socials: → Instagram: @toomuchapparently → TikTok: @toomuchapparently → YouTube: Too Much, Apparently → Website: www.toomuchapparently.com👩‍💻 Carly Radford: → Website: www.carlyradford.com → Instagram: @the_sensitivity_therapist👩🏻‍💻 Alice Tew: → Website: www.alicetew.com → Instagram: @reparentingwithalice📩 Email us: [email protected] 🗓️ New episodes every MondayThis is a podcast that says: bring your too-muchness… we’re here for it.Disclaimer: Just a quick note to say this podcast isn’t therapy, and it’s not a substitute for professional support. We’re here to share ideas and experiences, but if you’re struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support service near you.