31: How to Have a Healthy Body Image

We all, especially women, have struggled with body image, at least one time in our lives. The media and society at large do not make having a healthy body image easy. I want to highlight the fact that if we took all the mental energy people spend on thinking about, obsessing over and criticizing their bodies, and shifted it into thinking about how we could serve the world, change the world and solve big problems, imagine how different the world would be. If you are expending a lot of your own mental energy focusing on how you look rather than on how you feel and what you want to contribute, consider re-directing it.  In my 20's I was never diagnosed with anorexia or bulimia but I definitely would say I had body image issues. I possibly had body dysmorphia, which is when your obsession with how you look and what you eat gets in the way of your happiness and your ability to connect. I don't think I saw myself accurately. I was working as a personal trainer and nutritionist, so I was super obsessed about what I ate and I possibly had exercise bulimia too. If I ate "bad", I would be driven to tears with guilt. This went on for a few years until some major things shifted. It finally subsided when I committed to the type of personal and spiritual growth work I teach on this show. I focused more on working out and body image than I did on really diving in and doing the work. I also dealt with feeling out of control in my life. I had left my job and I didn't know what I wanted to do in my life. I had a huge expectation hangover in terms of where I thought I "should be". I had so much uncertainty. That is when I started a meditation practice and that really helps me to feel more settled and more present. The out of control feeling comes from when our mind is just going and going and we are future tripping all the time. That led me to create a much stronger spiritual practice and relationship with God. I was so self-obsessed I felt very, very separate. I didn't have a strong spiritual connection to begin with but the more I leaned into it, the more I talked to God and read spiritual books, the more the connection deepened. I got a purpose which was bigger than me. I got clear on what I was truly hungry for. I was hungry to serve. I was hungry to learn. I was hungry for spiritual connection. When I started to feed myself with what I was truly hungry for, the obsession with food, diet, exercise and body began to melt away. Any disorder, addiction or illness is there to get our attention. It is an indicator that there are unresolved issues we are working hard to suppress. It's a red flag that we are craving something and we are trying to feed ourselves through whatever the addiction and disorders are. These disorders reinforce the pain of separation. When we do things that are dangerous, even hurtful to our well-being, it's a cry out for God, for remembrance, for the awareness that we are so loved, whole and complete exactly as we are.  Today's caller, Anne, has been in and out of therapy for her eating disorder so I took a different approach with her. We worked on healing her bulimia with love.  I invite all of you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. I E-mail [email protected] for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in Los Angeles in July for my signature retreat.   Consider/Ask Yourself: ● Are you so obsessed with your body that it affects your emotional stability, everyday decisions or relationships? ● Have you gone through treatment for a disorder but just can't seem to be free of it? ● Are you aware of what you need to do to heal but cannot seem to integrate it?   Anne's Question: Anne has been struggling with bulimia for over 12 years. She has informed herself about how to get better but can't seem to take the necessary steps to free herself from its grip.   Anne's Key Insights and Aha's: ● Her bulimia is a coping mechanism ● She felt insecure while growing up ● She is trying to get to self-acceptance by not accepting the bulimia ● She doesn't know how to get by without her bulimia ● She doesn't feel lovable   How to get over it and on with it: ● Realize her bulimia has had a higher purpose in helping her to get love ● She may try to fully accept it and heal it with love ● Tell her bulimia it has a new job description ● She needs something to take the place of her disorder   Tools and Takeaways: ● If you realize you have an eating disorder or body image issue, please reach out for support. ● Don't judge your issue, be honest towards it and heal it with love. ● Write a letter of gratitude and appreciation towards what you would like to release. ● Set up two chairs and talk to your disorder, asking it what it needs and how it serves you. ● Don't go into hopeless/helpless state, believing this disorder is yours to carry for the rest of your life.   Sponsor: Onnit Wellness - Receive a 10% discount on your purchase when you order through this link (including my favorite Alpha Brain).   Resources: Christine Hassler Expectation Hangover @christinhassler on Twitter @christinehassler on Instagram [email protected] [email protected]