31: Valentine's Day is Upon Us Like an Orangutan Playing Ukulele

Ah, Valentine's Day, when an ancient poet with a hand for a head whispers your name. Right? Yes. But before we get to that, we begin with the semi-triumphant return of storybook theater (you might remember the first time we did this in "Episode 4: That's Not How You Make S'mores", or you might have blocked that from your thoughts.) Today is the story of a little girl, a pope (not THE pope, though) and some kind of dark shit. Then, it's time for the Gianetti brothers as they entice you and your sweetheart with, among other things, a cheese that was made by a llama on its birthday. Subscribe now and you'll get a coupon for a free ocelot*. (*no)