316. Regret is Shame Disguised As Maturity

The feeling of regret can weigh us down for life. People often spend a lifetime wishing they could turn back time and make a different decision about something in the past. But I came across a quote recently about regret and it hit me like a freight train:    "When we are living authentically, there is no regret. Regret is just shame disguised as maturity. Don't apologize for lessons learned or look down on past behaviours. Of course you don't do the same things anymore. You're evolving. You were exactly who you were supposed to be then just as you are now." (-Thee Moe Ari).    Oof. The 'shame disguised as maturity' part got me. Regret fools us into thinking we "learned from our mistakes." But learning is only theory…unless you do something with that knowledge. I made a choice at a young age to live totally free of regret. To me, there's only reflection - looking back and learning from the challenging times or decisions we made that didn't turn out. Reflecting on things that happened - emotional as they may be - is where growth happens. If you feel like you struggle with regret, I'm about to totally change your perspective.    In this episode, we're talking about:   Why people feel regret How to stop regretting things and reflect instead Why we should never avoid digging into our past What to do when strong emotions come up during reflection How to create space for emotions to flow properly Why it's important to try and see the best in everyone, especially yourself   Have a listen and let me know what you think - even if you disagree on regret vs. reflection.   REFERENCES:   Thee Moe Ari on Instagram @loveoutproud   "Regret is just shame disguised as maturity" quote: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cde5IrwDeZ1/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=    Episode 291 | "Confident Detachment & Radical Honesty In Relationships With Dr. Jade Teta"   Episode 286 | The Magic That Happens When You Believe & Assume The Best About People   CONNECT WITH EMILY Book a private coaching call with Emily to work together. Instagram: @emilygoughcoach   Email: [email protected]     Emily Gough Coaching   Room to Grow Podcast   Questions?  Comments? Want to connect and chat about this episode? You can email me at [email protected], or DM me over on Instagram @emilygoughcoach or Facebook at Emily Gough Coaching.  I would absolutely love to connect with you and thank you for listening in real life and here any takeaways you had from this or other episodes!.  It makes me day to see you listening to the podcast and fills me up with pure joy. Seriously. See you on the 'gram! If Instagram and Facebook aren't your jam, send me a good old fashioned email!  [email protected]