324: Is Attachment Theory WRONG? Do parents owe you support?

Evolutionary psychologist, Doug Lisle, PhD  discusses the following listener questions with host, Nathan Gershfeld: 1.  I'm trying to decide whether to go back to work a year after my second child, or to stay home with her till preschool. I have heard you say on your podcast 'it doesn't matter who raises your kids' which I understand to be a reference to twin studies that show that parents have very little influence on how their children turn out (outcomes are about 80% genetic). How do you square this with attachment theory, and psychologists who say that children need one primary caregiver for the first three years or they will be beset with anxiety and depression in their teen years. I am thinking of the book 'being there' by Erica Komisar in which she advocates very strongly for being a stay at home mother for the mental health of your children. I would like to have a third child, but being out of the workplace for 6 years would dent our finances and possibly my self esteem. 2. Dear doctors, I grew up in a Christian home but stopped going to church once I left home. All of my immediate family are still very religious and my parents financially support someone who was my best friend in high school, who has become a missionary. I find that dynamic very unfair and recently told both parties that I feel boundaries have been crossed. My friend asked my parents to stop supporting her but they refused. I feel betrayed by my parents. How do you advise I deal with the relationship moving forward? I've already ended my friendship but wish I could be emotionally closer to my parents.   Watch this episode on Youtube!   @BeatYourGenes   Host: Nathan Gershfeld                               Interviewee: Doug Lisle, Ph.D.  Podcast website:  http://www.BeatYourGenes.org True to Life seminars with Dr. Lisle and Dr. Howk : http://www.TrueToLife.us   Intro & outro song: City of Happy Ones · Ferenc Hegedus. Licensed for use.  Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast