Headlies are like a dick. These monsters are a lovely little show. They cross around and squeals and snores. Look everyone, look everyone, look at me.
Oh, I'm going, going, going, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, snores, hey! Wait! Pay no mind to what they say. Uh uh uh uh.
Just the jealous games people play. He he he he he. Happy singing with me. Our lips are sealed.
Our boobs are saggy wet. My nuts are sag. I hope that's not how it goes when I get to that show. Oh, did I say that out loud?
Yes, you did, Boogie. And we'll talk about it when we start the show! The following show is for mature audiences only. Listener discretion is advised.
And if you don't like it, please go fuck yourself. One, two, three, four! Do you feel your sex life is quite lame? Scared that your desires might be strained?
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Ah, I am assuming Boogie is in the library. I am at my desk and we are going to put together a Kinky Lifestyle. Kick and S. Are you at the library?
I am at the library. My milk is not across the street and I'm very sad about that. I actually turned the table so I'm facing the window right at it in case she wants to come out and bend over. A little bit do some gardening or something like that.
A little objectifying. I consider it if it's over 50 yards, it's not rude. Objectification because God knows I tell you I people much closer than that. The lady across the tables from me today, probably about 15, 20 feet away, just had these beautiful eyes.
And I just, yeah, yeah. There's some printers trying to get it on the library. I'm not trying to get it on. I'm just trying to not focus on the 800 fucking crazy homeless people that are here with me.
And so you just try to find those little moments of beauty in between. But that's not what's important, Kathy. I have a number of reports. The first report is that today, Kathy, I filled the bag of minimal optimism.
And the bag of minimal optimism is the toy bag that I am bringing to tomorrow night's party at DomCon, the Friday night party that you and I will be attending tomorrow night. I filled a very small bag. I have no doubt that you will get somebody to play with. I don't know why you would doubt that.
I have not been to a party party in so long that I don't know if I'll know anybody. I don't know if there's going to be a place for me to work my magic. I don't know how I'm going to feel about myself. I have literally one shirt and one pair of pants.
And that is what I will be wearing both days. Like that's not just like a tank top and shorts. Like I normally wear seven days a week. Is that the outfit you posed in when you went for a job interview?
Is that the one outfit you have? No, actually, I don't even think I have that one anymore. I think those pants, I mean, those are God awful pants. I would not wear those.
Those were great. You looked really good in that. Yeah. Yeah.
You keep telling yourself that. And I surely do appreciate your optimism. But the minimal optimism is that I will notice I'm not dragging some big toy bag. But I just like literally have this little doctor's bag and it's like, you know, a couple of floggers, little paddle, little thing just in case I see someone I know or I find that footing that footing to where I can get because I know that if I kick into the mojo, because sometimes Kathy, you got to push the mojo.
Uh huh. You just we talk about this. You know what? I wrote a jingle about it.
It goes right here. If you haven't had six for a long time to be shocked, you'll immediately has to hate. It's special. You got to push.
You're supposed to say that was great. Boogie. That was great. That was great.
That was great. I like that. I like that. You repeated it twice too.
Little submissive. Aren't you, Kathy? But that but no, so sometimes you got to. And we are.
There are so many things that you and I are now doing. We're going to Dom con. Uh, it looks like we may even pick up a party next month at the, uh, the old digs that you and I used to hang out with. If we can muzzle our way in there, you've been going to some parties.
I did something three days ago that Kathy. I think even you will be proud of me. What? I think you will be proud of me.
I watched, um, you know, I'm at the library and I have a little new section for the new DVDs that's like new to the library, whatever. And sometimes it's a relatively newer DVD and I look in there and it has a documentary on the go-go's, which was literally one of my favorite bands that I mean for, for younger listeners that don't know who the go-go's are. They were a punk pop band from the eighties. It was all women.
They were the first all girl band to literally have a number one record that played their own instruments and wrote their own music. I was singing, we were singing some of the song, you know, in the beginning. And it's just always been, I've loved them all. I have literally fantasized about all of them.
They have these great fun songs. Uh, they weren't quite insane. Let me tell you, they were, and they were just party fucking animals, the documentaries. And you knew they, they, they did all the same rockstar stuff that men do.
It was no different. They, they lived their, their magic, but they also kind of held some things together enough to get a few albums out. So at the end of the video, and I had known they had gone off tour a long time and they had to run off and, you know, and then stopped. And so I'm like, God, I wish I would always just wish I could have, you know, done my pilgrimage and seen the fucking Go-Go's play before they stopped playing.
And at the end of this documentary, I guess Jane wrote a new St. James the guitarist who, you know, who by the way is kinky by the way. Jane of the Go-Go's is kinky has even, you know, is part of the community, has done a lot of stuff. I don't know if she does any teaching in the kink community.
I would love to have her on the show. Oh my God, I would love to have Jane on the show. Um, she even tried once in the like 90s to, she hosted something on MTV and she decorated the entire set like a BDSM dungeon and like trying to kind of like, like really being a pioneer back before people really talked about it. And so she tried, I would love to talk to her about that.
But, uh, but anyway, so yeah, I've lessed it after all of them and she wrote a new song. And here they are at the end of this video, singing it. And I go, wait a minute, that's a news. I just took the chance, went to their website, holy shit, Kathy.
They're doing six shows. And one of them is in Los Angeles and you know how pessimistic I am, how I don't make a move and I literally just click the button and I struggled insanely for like 15 solid minutes staring at the Microsoft theater, uh, you know, menu and I bought a ticket to go see the go-gos on December 20. I did it. I actually did something.
I will stand there and of course, you know, they're all pushing 60. So so I'm not expecting, you know, super high energy, but you know, they still sound great. So it should be a great show. Yeah.
It's the first show that I will have gone to in probably a few years at least. So I'm excited about that. You're going to DomCon. You're going to concerts.
What's going on here? I'm trying to get out. Mu had her first proctology day. It was an amazing.
What did I not tell you about this? No. Okay. I'm giving the report because this is really all the list.
This is Kinky. The other stuff is like, well, you trying to be things and whatever. But Mu said you have to talk about this. Mu likes to check in with the audience and make sure that they know that she's still a freak of nature.
And so Mu's in Ed School. And now she's in her second year and it's time to do the proctology exam. It is time to go up a man's ass. And that's part of med school.
You have to learn all of these things. And we talked about it on a show a couple of months ago that there are actual people that their job is to go med school to med school and let all the students finger their asshole. Oh my God. Like a hundred students, you know, it's it's finger your asshole day.
And it's always some old dude in the new night joke out. There is no way. No way that this isn't mildly something that dude is into. They pay them for that.
They pay them very well for this. So and so maybe that's something you can get into. Maybe it is. I'm thinking maybe you and I, you could do the pelvic and I could do the procto.
I wouldn't mind somebody brofingering me in the JJ for some money. What like, I mean, like a hundred different students and all you have to do is just act cool, but not be cool inside. Like you can be like the dude they had. She said, Oh my God, I was so glad I was wearing a mask because I was ear to ear grin the entire time.
She said it was everything I hoped it would be and more like one of the students that was with her was like this kind of uptight religious girl. She got to watch her. She's all that was probably the first dick she ever touched in her life. She was just smiling and laughing and enjoying.
It was a 78 year old dude that's been doing this for 14 years and he stand there in groups of four and in her group, the guy stands and he's just like, saying they're in his robe and he's like, okay, and this is what you're supposed to do. And he undoes his robe and he starts yanking on his dick and he's all you're supposed to grab the shaft right here and do this. And then, you know, this is how you pull it and you know, you're going to do this exam. So, so, so like real matter of fact, he's done this hundreds of times.
Well, if you're a 70 year old dude and you're an idiot. Okay, 78 even better. Why not sign up for this? You get paid for it and you get young people touching your junk plane, touching your junk all day.
And then he's like bending over the table and he's like, okay, now you're supposed to pull the cheeks apart and then you want to get a lot of lube on your fingers and now we're going to go up and he's, I mean, he's got his shtick down and you know in his mind, he's like, there's no way, no way. And then I know, no, do you think you're at the prostate? Do you think you're at the prostate? I don't know.
Well, you're not there. Keep digging. You got to go a little deeper. Wow.
She's like, if I could have just paid to have you there, I go, no, pumpkin, I'm better just hearing about it. But then, He does not want to see no 78 year old man. I don't want to see. And he's explaining the different positions and I mean, very professional.
You know, and it is information they have to know you and I are going to tell you about it like junior hires. But obviously, this is something that's very important. Men have to get their check. Mine's coming up.
We're going to do an entire show based on it because this is something that I have legitimately feared to the point of being willing to die of cancer. To avoid this test. And now I'm at better grips with it. So we'll do a whole thing.
But yeah, oh, she just it just went on and on and they were in there about two hours just playing with this guy's asshole prostate and genitals. And he's been doing it 14 years. 14 years. That's how many fingers do you think have been in that?
Elder man's asshole. I'm trying not to think about it, but Mew is a freaky little woman. She just thought it was the greatest thing ever. Wow.
Ever. And then she said the religious girl couldn't get up there enough. And find it. And she's like, I don't know.
I don't know. And he's like, Oh, don't worry about it. There's another position. And the guy literally just gets on his back, puts his feet in the stirrups.
And she has to go straight in missionary position. Look, I'm right in the eye while she's doing it. Look, I'm in the eye. Say you're a good boy, aren't you?
You're a good boy. I'm a milky motherfucker. Oh my God. Oh my God, so much fun.
Do you have anything to report? I don't know that I have anything kinky to report. You know, I would love to play with someone the way you were containing that is some optimism on your part. But I'll tell you right now, the only you know what, my patience lately is frayed to such a degree that I can see right through it.
At this point in my life, I'm not wanting to negotiate. I'm not wanting to put up with anybody's fucking bullshit. If you want to play with me, you're going to do what I say. I don't want to hear it.
Jabber jabber. Just get on your fucking knees and go get me some tea when I tell you to and then get right back on your knees where you fucking belong. That's how I feel to say. And I don't think I'm going to get a lot of play partners with that.
Headly. Headly book a trip. Hitley's like, why? That sounds perfectly delightful, Catherine.
That sounds absolutely wonderful. Or headly. We just use and abuse him. I don't think that's using an abusing in a way that he would feel very used and abused by.
I'm just saying, I'm taking it headly. Please let me know. Let me know what you think on this topic. I know you're listening.
Our glorious show sponsor. I think if I can find a headly type person who will just do as I say and not talk back, I would be willing to play with some of the way I feel right now. I'm just on a very thin edge right now. I am a woman on the edge boogie.
I am starting to lose it, to lose my ability to be nice and accommodating. I could turn into one of those assholes. You're getting like sexually bitter because you want something to play with or? No, no, no, no.
I am. I'm learning a great deal in therapy, which frankly, I don't want to be learning. It's like when I finally became an atheist, I didn't want to bring that around. It just fucking happened.
And this is the same thing. You give a girl too much information, too much knowledge, and it turns her world upside down. And I am just I'm just reaching an edge where I I tired of being accommodating. Well, it's OK.
It's there's nothing you're just you know, wow, you push the mojo. This may be how you have to push it. And I think there's plenty of people out there that maybe not plenty, you know, for you and I level of plenty, meaning some maybe one a couple one with payment with payment and some food stamps. But I think that there is nothing wrong with you saying upfront, Hey, until my mojo comes back and a fluid, submissive, joyful, jerky off kind of way, this is going to be my show and this is how I want it.
And I'm just laying it in front of you. And it's actually very honest and authentic. I don't necessarily I can't see it because what you're doing, I mean, in a sense is is kind of like topping. And if you want to bottom, then you're bottoming from the top, which we've never established is a negative thing.
It's negative. It's not a negative thing. I I've enjoyed that. I've enjoyed also being a service top.
I I enjoy all that stuff. But right now, if you're not into service submission and you have very strict rules about what you're doing, you don't want walk the fuck away because I am not in the fucking mood for it. Well, I mean, maybe your approach is what we'll work on, you know, I don't know. I maybe you can just say I'm not interested.
If you're interested, walk the fuck away a lot better. Don't get in my way, boogie. I will not. I am not going to be bulldozed by the mighty tornado that is Kathy's libido.
All right. That's final. From the King, Shaming World, for your peace of mind, please know the author of every post we talk. Yeah, yeah, but who I gave us permission a long time ago with blanket permission.
He said, use whatever. This is the kind of person I like. He literally emailed us and said, Hey, I wrote a post. You want to use it?
Here's the link. That's my kind of guy. That's my kind of listener. Just don't make me work for it.
I think I'm going a little off the edge here. And before I piss off, so do you want to now fly down from where they are? Now, leave the core alone, but who is doing just fine on his own? All right.
He wrote a really great post entitled, It Appeals to Men Who Have the Fantasy to Do Those Things to Women. So apparently he was trolling through YouTube and he came across this video on a bunch of comments and it was about porn and sex addiction. But basically it was about, you know, D.S. porn and S&M porn.
And this is, I'm just going to quote the part he had a problem with. This is what somebody said or wrote when what he saw. Quote, there is porn out there that portrays women getting abused. The woman is spit on, slapped, called derogatory names, etc.
I don't find that attractive. It appeals to men who have the fantasy to do those things to women. The King community is consensual. The aforementioned porn is also consensual, but it portrays a power imbalance dynamic.
The man has control through abuse and degradation of the woman. And the woman is submissive while crying and screaming. Personally, I like porn where both actors seem to be enjoying themselves. End quote.
And this is what, but chorus says about that. You ready? I didn't, when I got to this point in the post, I'm all, oh, it's going to be good. Or I'm just a giant wafting pussy.
Go ahead. That's cool, buddy. Enjoy whatever vanilla porn you want. That's my.
My biggest issue was quote, It Appeals to Men Who Have the Fantasy to Do Those Things to Women. End quote. Having been a service top, I can say this is not entirely false, but it should also be noted that there are men who have little interest in doing these things, but do them because it is what the woman in question requested in the negotiation. This is not to take away from the fact that there are abusive assholes who will say they are dominance as an excuse to abuse women.
However, sometimes in a scene, the submissive being beaten, spat upon or humiliated may have been the one requesting this from the service top. Summing up, not all BDSM humiliation or power exchange, not power imbalance as the commenters stated, is aimed at the male fantasy to abuse women. Sometimes it's a woman's fantasy to be in that type of placing. She may be crying, but I've watched and been part of enough post scenes to know she was likely enjoying herself more than anyone else in the room.
Now then, Kathy, to be not forgiving, but there's a thing, and I've watched a lot of this over the years, some of it in my younger self. So when I recognize some of these behaviors in other people and they may kind of ignorant statements, there's a small, however small, I didn't give myself a pass on it. I had to change a lot of my points of views from when I was younger and of course coming from the Christian shit. I had a lot of things that I had to change and especially a lot of my views on women and sexuality and things like that.
But I think there's a part of a lot of the people that make these types of comments. It's because they want to feel smart. They want to feel like they have some sort of psychological inside track to what people think. It's the same type of people that say, when you say, oh, someone's a stripper, they say, oh, hello, daddy issues.
It's like kind of almost the same cliche. Because you hear this a lot. The biggest conflict with the same droning argument that, you know, the people that do this, you know, obviously they're abusive or they desire to be abusive is that every time that common is made, it always completely ignores and or invalidates the needs, wants and desires of the person on the bottom. Like they don't even exist.
Like this person is not in, but we're touched on it. You know, it's always a, it's a one sided thing, which in and of itself is means that you don't know what the fuck you're talking about because there is another person involved in this. And it's always kind of assuming that the bottom is always a female in this situation and that there are always some sort of victim that's just doing it because they've been scared or manipulated into doing it by the evil man. It's the same thing every time.
And it's not smart and it's not well thought out. And it's actually pretty discriminatory towards women that all women are so feeble that they can't possibly, no matter how educated, no matter how self aware, know how what their upbringing is, no matter what that no woman is actually capable of making an informed decision about their own sexuality. Yeah, that's a good point that he does say that. In fact, I cut it out, but he says in part of the post, not all women who want to have a scene like that have been traumatized or abused as many seem to think some are genuinely just looking for some danger or excitement while being in a well negotiated place scene where the word stop may be ignored.
But she knows that she says Guatemala, the dog will stop the scene and immediately go into posting an aftercare. And he's right. When you lump everything together, when I hear shit like this, to me, it's no different than someone saying we should ban sex altogether because some women get raped. Right.
That's one that's an absolutely ridiculous, unthinking, unintelligent, stupid comment, nobody would make it. But you feel that like you say the people who want to sound smarter than everybody else that they can make these broad, sweeping statements, none. And he's right. In none of this, he has not a problem with somebody liking vanilla porn more.
He doesn't have any problem with this guy saying I prefer porn where both people are enjoying themselves. None of those things go right ahead. But it's when you make a ridiculous statement like it appeals to men who have the fantasy to do those things to women where your whole case falls apart. Because if that's what you think, it is a very narrow minded view.
And I could, I could feel a room filled with women who do not agree, who are in charge because they've negotiated it, who are doing it because they are in a committed trusting relationship and they do trust the person that they're with. And they are enjoying themselves, but you don't see it because you don't see a fucking smile on their face because the porn doesn't show you the aftercare. It doesn't show you what happens afterwards because it's all acting. But in real life, you better fucking believe that something happens at the end of that scene.
I totally agree. And it's, I mean, if you think, I mean, just to address that comment, you can go through so many things. So what you're saying is if somebody's screaming and crying are in pain and you're the one officiating that or managing that suffering, then what about a coach, a mixed martial arts coach or a coach of contact sports where it's hitting and aggressive and there is pain and there is suffering and injury in order to achieve the next level of that ability at that sport. So are you saying the coach secretly just wants to abuse people that it's not about bringing somebody through something to that next level of higher ability or awareness at their craft is a dentist who drills into your fucking head, which I'm going to have in another two weeks.
And a lot of people scream and cry at dentists is a dentist and abuser because they're causing someone pain and suffering. Or is it that you're right? Is it that they can fucking handle it? Because that's really what it comes down to in a lot of these times where people are trying to downplay an intense play scene.
It's because they can't handle it and they know in the back of their mind that a lot of women like it, a lot of people like it. They like to be taken control. They like that aggressive primal animal control that they give up and they're looking for someone who has the fucking balls to do it and they can't. So the only thing they can do is to try to bolster themselves up by saying you're broken or damaged if you do those things to somebody.
I mean, I agree. I think it is a highly ignorant statement when you bring up examples like the one you just brought up and people will always say, yeah, but yeah, but yeah. But in all of those, including the porn and the power exchange examples, you're talking about, for the most part, two people who have agreed and negotiated when entering into that relationship. If you're going to a dentist, like I feel free to book you because I also was just there yesterday and they didn't even use Novocaine and I was like jumping out of my seat.
Oh my God. They'll use Novocaine, isn't it something else now? I don't know what it is, but they better fucking put some of it in my fucking gum because I got a whole bitch. I got more holes than you do.
Oh my I've had four and let's not talk about this. Anyway, when you talk about fairness or balance, you have to really understand what those words mean. If you, let's say, are looking at a vanilla marriage, man and a wife, and they all both have decided that this is the way the partnership is going to play out. We both make money.
I make a little bit more. You handle the kids all modal on. I'll do all of this. Do you call all that balanced and fair?
Everybody entered into it, negotiating. And then they came to an agreement at the end of it. The outsider looking in doesn't really have all the information they need in order to make a judgment about whether that is balanced or fair. And the same is true of porn or DS porn.
I'm sorry. I'm taking fucking porn off the table. I don't think porn is even part of this negotiation because it's all fucking acting. I'd rather discuss actual power exchanges where those things really do happen.
So you can't make a statement like that. And I'm going to say again, what he very, it said very eloquently in his post. We're not talking about actual abusers here. We're talking about scenes in which hopefully they're negotiated and they're two responsible adults who are each getting what they want out of it.
So I think this is a great post and as usual, I just love it when our listeners give us blanket permission because I don't need to ask for shit. Just take what I want. Not if they negotiate anything. You are correct.
Get on your knees and bring me tea when I want it. I've already written it down. I'm not pimping for you, but I'm kind of in for you. I will bring you a line of men and they'll just get on their knees and when I'll have Earl Grey and the other one I'll have like some, some, you know, black tea with lemon and, you know, so you'll actually get to pick your tea and the kneeling position together.
That would be so lovely. You're not bent over and I'll put the saucer on your ass. Oh, when you find your love like waiting and you might need some explaining. Don't do us for some looking advice.
This is another one that I like because Kazoo came to me. I'd have to go looking for anything. He just said, Hey, man, here's my question. Thank you, Kazoo.
He here's what he has. Cause he was a she by the way. Yeah, because it was a sheet. Yes.
I'm thinking, but, uh, two guys, no, wait a minute. Cause he was a woman. You want everyone to bend over in front of you. I know.
I don't mind women bending over. Hey, I'm equal opportunity asshole today. All right. Kazoo wrote to us and says, Hi, PP parents.
Oh, right off the bat boogie. I'm like, what? Can I be, Mommy? Do you want to be daddy today?
Now you're talking about you're like the complete asshole today. I'm the my, I'm the hardcore mommy. I could be in mommy's or assholes too. Okay.
Yeah, you don't have to. Oh, boogie. Boogie as mommy. She's.
Oh my God. Kazoo says, Hi, PP parents. I moved in with my two partners in May of 2020. And for the most part, things have gone very smoothly.
We talked through what we need to talk through. We enjoy each other's company while maintaining boundaries. We all pitch in to keep the house clean and we all save a bit of money on rent. However, we're also keeping our sights on the future.
The two of them want to buy a house, possibly a bit further out of town. Because of my age and because I've only been with them for two years, I've set a boundary on not putting my name down on any house legal paperwork, which they understand. There are aspects of living on my own that I miss. I miss playing music at midnight when I get home from work.
I miss decorating my whole house and I miss having people over spontaneously. We get along very well for the most part, but we're three people with three different mindsets and egos, which make things can make things messy. To make a long story short, PP host, what do you think should be my main considerations when I make a housing decision? I know you two have limited experiences living with a partner, but I do value your input.
Well, that is so nice. This is like a zoo coming to parents for advice. Look at that. And why does everyone say that I have limited?
I've heard that from someone before. I've lived with five fucking different women. Yes, but that was in your youth. You know, you turned pretty early on.
I was decided you hated everybody. No, I lived with a woman for two years when I was married. I lived with two different. I lived with another fiance.
I lived with a girlfriend whose other. I lived with a mew for three and a half, four years. So I may not have had a lot of long term multi-year living situations, but I've lived with a lot of different people, not to mention a number of roommates and stuff like that, which leads me to my advice because it was very, very clear to me. I'm not going to say this is a hundred percent guaranteed prediction, but it sounds like Kazoo really doesn't need our advice.
She just needs permission to not shame herself for the fact that she wants her own castle and there's nothing wrong with it. If you can afford it, if you can afford to have your own place, you should have your own fucking place period end of story. That's my opinion. If you can afford it, if there's not, if you're somebody that likes this, it's actually a very special type of person that can cohabitate with another or multiple other people.
And that's kind of cool all the time. If you're the type of person that kind of likes their own rhythm and especially, like she said, I like turning my music on at night, whatever, if you can afford it, if there's not a financial obligation or burden for you to have to live with other people, have your sanity. It gives you more conversations to have when you do get together with your partners. It's actually a very positive thing.
Right. I don't know what she means when she says, because of my age, I don't know, does that mean she's older or younger? But I unfortunately, I think you're getting with you and I boogie, anybody who asks us this question is going to get the advice from two very crotchety ornery old people who want you to get off my line, leave me alone. Stop making all that noise, which is true.
Look, I don't just like living alone. I thrive when I live alone. I can, I mean, I don't need it. I don't need it to survive, obviously.
And there are more important things at certain times in your life, but I do love my solitude. I do love living alone, but I have no friends. I have people in my life who feel the exact opposite. They actually start to wither a bit the longer they live alone.
They enjoy. Just snooze that way. Yes. So I think that you need to determine for yourself, not just what you're OK with, but in what environment you thrive.
And the reason is that you can put up with a lot, especially when we're younger, we put up with so much and we can endure different things. This life seems so much different when we're younger. But when you're going to put your name down on legal paperwork, she's right to take a lot more into account. This isn't signing a one or two year lease to share an apartment.
What happens down the line if you decide to get married with someone or move out of state, those things all need to be discussed. It sounds from what she said that she and her partners are mature enough and smart enough to realize that what they need to do. And if you are confident that you can enter into this kind of investment with two people in which you can lay down all the what ifs and put it in writing and make it all legal so that there's no hard feelings in the end, then I say go for it because a property investment is a great thing for the future. But I think that all the pieces have to fall into place before you make that decision.
You have to make sure you're comfortable living with people, you're comfortable living with people for a number of years, that you're comfortable in particular with these two people living together for a number of years, that you're confident that things aren't going to go sour because you've done this the proper way legally to take into all the contingencies into account of what if, what if, what if, and if all those pieces fall into place, you know, go for it. It can be a little messy if things change, if the five or ten years down the line, but that's not the end of the world. If you know right now that your plan is to move away or your plan is I'll join people who say I'll jump ship them in and I get a job out of state. They have no problem moving around.
That's something to take into consideration. But all in all I think when you're about to sign a 30 year mortgage, you better be damn sure you won't spend all that time with two people. I think that is fantastic and enlightened advice, Cathy. That is wonderful, wonderful advice.
Well, I mean, because it's true. I mean, I was raised my entire life in the real estate market. My dad's been a broker almost my whole life. So hearing the horror stories of when deals go bad or people get excited and then you have to split up properties and, you know, title transfers and all of that type of stuff can get really, really messy.
And like you said, most people, it's kind of like a prenuptial, 60% of the, you know, 60% of the time there's going to be a breakup. So if you don't have a plan for that, but people don't want to make a plan because then it looks like you don't trust somebody or, you know, there's that insecurity. Well, let me tell you what, it's a goddamn awful wake up call a few years down the line when shit turns sour and your money and your investment and your time and you are now wrapped in a deal you can't get out of or you're going to lose a lot of money or you're stuck paying money because somebody else fucked up the credit. Somebody else did something.
Somebody else did some scandalous and got the wrong broker and did some sort of thing. And, you know, there's so many things that are led everyone into signing something. They probably didn't look at well enough. You know, when you start getting into that, you're now in business with those people.
And, and so the way you put it is just take your, take your time. And if you're kind of free spirited, my first guess is don't do it. Buy your own goddamn house, buy your own, whatever you're going to buy. That's the same.
You have a better chance of weathering any storm if it's just a lease or renting that you're doing. That's a lot easier to begin with, but, you know, I hope the best for her and her partners. It sounds good. And no shame.
No matter how you are. If there's, there shouldn't be however you are, be true to yourself and don't have shame about it. It was a great letter, great little letter. Yeah.
I do like your pussy. Do what? What? I'm a little more flexible than you are, Kathy.
I don't need tea. I just need the vagina. I'm a little more flexible than you are, Kathy. I don't need tea.
I don't need tea. I don't need tea. I don't need tea. I don't need tea.
Yeah. I don't need tea. I am flexible. I'm going to a goddamn go-go concert.
Head of the heat. Should I go and have myself out of control? Oh my God. Oh my God.
I'm going to be in love with five women. Just staring, just staring from my nosebleed seat in the back of the... Where... Oh, it's a nosebleed seat.
No, well, I don't like people. Like I want to see the go-go's and I wish I could just be in a drone hovering above the audience even in back. I just ate people. So I could have had a seat that was like only 20 aisles away.
There were still open seats, but I'm like, I want to be on an aisle. So I don't have to be... Like I can literally just be like, I'm going to walk up this aisle and go away. So I went back another 10, 12.
I mean, either way, it's a small theater. It's going to be cool. You know? It's going to be cool.
But I hate people. That's why I don't go to concerts. I just... Everyone's going to be around.
They're going to have their cell phones up and there's going to probably be people trying to smoke weed and shit like that. It's going to fucking... I'm going to just be... I know.
I just... See, I shouldn't have even talked about it. I should just now... You're just going on your ass.
You're on the stage, yes. That's what I did when I saw the B-52s. I was surrounded by literally 8,000 humping making out dudes because their audience is like 98% gay, gay dudes. And I was in the way back and I just stood on my tippy toes over all the making out dudes and just looked at Kate and just let love just come back.
It's probably close to what I'll be doing. Go, go. Take it through still on sale. Go do it.
See you there. If you see it, if you see a faded sign at the end of the road that says 15 miles to the love shack, don't go there boogie. It will be filled with people fucking and you will not want to see it. Oh my God.
But if Kate's there, she Kate's going to be there. I got to go. I got to go. Kathy was really down and needed to be lifted up.
E.P. listeners sent her love and virtual love for her. But... Alright, are we ready for some more virtual butt rubs for me?
I have my pen and paper and I want, let's get into some more Kathy butt rubbing because I thought last week it was really cool. And I got some comments from people that they also enjoyed going over some of these things because I don't know if it's just that we love you and we like to see you kind of embrace this. It's kind of also fun to see you squirm a little. But let's proceed.
That's what it is really. Well for me, for everyone else, it's a love fest for me. It's just like how uncomfortable can we both be together. And so now just to go back with the listeners, Pop-A-N-Off wrote a post in our FET Life Group page because Kathy's been going through all these transitions and the breakup and therapy and stuff like that.
And so a lot of perverted podcast listeners had a chance to write some very thoughtful and heartfelt things that they appreciate about Kathy and it got very personal and it was pretty detailed. And so we read a few a couple weeks ago and we're going to read a few more now and then just kind of take a look at those. Okay. Willy wrote, hey Kathy, just going to say the obvious here.
You're an amazing person and the perfect compliment to Boogie's manic creative force. You provide fantastic insights and keep the show from running off the rails with your even keeled personality. Yes, I did just mix boat and train metaphors. Fuck it.
Just keep being your amazing self. Come with me. I love it when people mix metaphors. It's my favorite thing ever.
Just box with my head. Even keeled. I had to look those up. I'm like, keeled what?
Off the rails, keeled. Oh, keeled. Yeah, keeled. Yeah, yeah, that's a boat thing.
I'm not smart. I'm not smart. So you were called insightful and level headed. Yes.
Even keeled personality. Well, I'll tell you what, the state I'm in right now, I just want to rail against that and go what? I am not. I am afraid and on the edge.
You are not super level headed today. But in general, when we're talking about the six year history of our show together, that I mean, I surely see that you are much more stable than me. But that's a stupid comparison because I fucking litter a bowling shoe is more stable than me. A bowling shoe and that makes me sound so sexy.
Yes. So I don't think I'm a good person to measure yourself against. It's a very low bar. Well, it's a very nice compliment.
And what he's mentioning are things that I strive to be. And so when someone sees that, I feel like my work is done. I feel really happy to hear those words. Unfortunately, as you said, but the way I'm feeling right now because therapy has just brought up a bunch of stuff to the surface that is maybe deeply unhappy and that I'm dealing with right now.
And that makes me want to scream and say, why do I always have to be so even keeled and level headed and why? I tend to go to extremes. But when this dies down and I come to some understanding of why my life is the way it is, I will come back to my center, which is always to try and be even keeled and be insightful and be that middle ground. So that does sound sexy, but it's always what I've tried to be.
And frankly, I just I need to start owning that. Well, I think it's like it's just like a law of physics almost. Like if you have a giant bowl that's halfway filled with still water, like the water is calm and it's just there, no matter how softly you try to pour more water into it, it's going to stir up the water and it's not going to be balanced anymore. Water is going to be swirling around.
And that's what's happening to you right now is in therapy, all this new water is being poured into your bowl. So of course, it's got to swirl around until eventually gravity pulls it and does its thing. And then eventually though, not only are you going to have a more full bowl, but it is also going to stabilize if you seek that balance, which you've always and that's why I agree when they call you even keeled is that you have always been somebody for better for worse. And when I relate on this on this front that you seek balance in logic and that even though your feelings are all over the place, the goal is still truth.
The goal is still still water to have a balance to be able to see the bigger picture. Yeah. Well, it was. Yeah.
Thank you for that. And thank you to Willie for saying that's very, very nice. We've got time to do a couple more. Okay.
So wicked. Our lovely, wicked, wrote in and said lovely, sexy. Oh my God, just just wicked on her back and just tracing her thighs and what? You're working yourself into a lather.
You know what? That's completely fine because I, you know, that's wicked. Sorry. All right.
Wicked says, oh, all the feels I could express for you are ever enduring conquering and amaze balls, Kathy. Wicked has a way with words, man. Your voice always brings me a sense of belonging and feeling safe. When I'm feeling down, your demeanor brings me comfort.
And even on the worst of days, you still manage to bring sparkle and life to the podcast. You have an innate ability to make me smile. You are the kinky big sister I wish I had. The way you open up and take us, the listeners through the good, bad, ugly and delicious makes it feel like we're there with you.
And for that, I thank you. You and Mr. Boogie Man are the ever highlight of my listening week. Lots of love and lingering hugs.
You're jammy pants girl. Jammy pants girl. Jammy pants. Well, that is really lovely.
So that's the, I thought it was incredibly touching the big sister thing because I think a lot of people feel that way about you because you do even, even in all the chaos and ranniness and whatever, you are, you are a pit bull for people feeling empowered. You really do have that energy to where you want people to be okay and you want them to feel comfortable and accepted and that their feelings are valid and that they belong wherever they want to belong. And I think that's a really accurate, how do you feel about that? I, you know, I, at heart, I'm a very accommodating and agreeable person and I feel tremendous satisfaction in making others feel good.
So when she says that my demeanor brings her comfort, that she says I have an innate ability to make her smile, you know, that goes right to the core of me because I just love, love, love, making people feel comfortable. It's why I enjoy hosting get-togethers. If I ever do get my own place, again, I, it's one of the things I look forward to. I seek friends out because that kind of connection that you have with one another.
And I'm going to say this, I don't give a fuck when anybody thinks, especially when it comes to women. The energy of women for me has always centered me and come to me and brought a smile to my face. I don't feel like I'm on stage when I'm surrounded with women. And not in the past, when I had my own place, nothing made me happier than to invite my friends over to serve them tea, to serve them something delicious to eat, to just sit around where nobody's watching us and we don't need to worry about what we're wearing or if our makeup is on right or if our hair is the perfect way because we're just commiserating with one another.
That feeling is so amazing to me. And it really bolsters me. If I had my way, I would have it at least once a week, it would be a weekly thing because it makes me feel that good. To hear somebody say that that comes across in a podcast makes me ridiculously happy.
I don't think I could say anything more about that. Very, very good. And more. Okay.
Well, this is funny. Kazoo again, Kazoo is coming back for a second round here. Kazoo says, I found your voice before I ever started practicing kink and polyamory and it has been a great help in my life. Your candor and articulation has demonstrated clear and healthy communication regardless of circumstance or comfort level.
As a newbie to polyamory, hearing someone have those discussions has made me feel more comfortable and able in the discussions I have with my circle. You manage to show how to take and leave criticism without shedding out critiques. That's a skill not many people have. On top of it all, your wit is top notch.
Your laugh is contagious and your ability to stick up for yourself has given a little guidance to my people pleasing self. I'm struck with how unfair these funny little parasocial relationships are between fans and content creators, especially when the creator gives so much heart in what they do. You keep so much of yourself into the show and to your listeners, your humor, your wisdom and your hurt. It feels impossible to return the favor when you've impacted us so much.
How could we ever put it all into words? I hope you feel that appreciation you certainly deserve to. You really are my favorite podcast. Jesus fucking Christ.
I want to cry. That's just the nicest fucking thing. I mean, I'm going to put pace this one in particular on my computer because there are times when I'm just really tired and I'm like, oh my God, what I got to do with the podcast. And it's knowing that there are listeners like this out there that make me keep going.
I know how sappy that sounds, but it's very true. It is very true. In general, when you hear that what you set out to do, and I don't think it's an incredible science, we have sat down and spent a lot of time with a fairly specific focus to above all else. I mean, out of all the things we've tried and all the things we want to do and all the things I want to do.
The main focus has always been in the middle of it to at least try to be authentic, to at least try to be vulnerable because the theory is what we're hearing from your listeners is that if you're vulnerable with somebody and I learned this a long time ago, even preaching and counseling and crisis counseling and stuff that I used to do when I was much, much younger, that I knew how much value there was in my pain, suffering, abuse, and negative experiences in life. I found out very early that if you openly share those with people, you immediately give them something to hold on to in the middle of their chaos where they believe that they were the only ones that have gone through these feelings, thoughts, experiences. So you have always been magnificent with that. You have always been like, I don't want to talk about this.
I don't want to talk about this. All of a sudden, I'm like, Kathy, he's now talking about this. I'm not going to stop her. I'm not going to talk about this.
I'm not totally not going to talk about this. I'm not going to talk about this. I'm not going to talk about this. Like, let the show start to 20 minutes later.
God damn it. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I think there's some in a life where so much doesn't go out how we planned it, I really cling to and I hope these types of letters help you cling to the fact that there is value to our experiences and who you are and who you've been. Yeah, it really does.
Because those words are just lovely. To me, the part where she said you managed to show how to take and lead criticism without shutting out critiques, that's a skill not many people have. I am so glad that that comes across because I know I can be a total fucking asshole. No.
I'm admitting it, but it's true. You're just going to have to accept that your cohost is an asshole. You just go ahead and whatever line you need to tell yourself right now to get through the day, but I do not believe it at all. But it's true.
You're even trying to hide that one behind a cough or something. Oh, sorry, Harold. I'll edit that in later. I really do try and I think I fail fucking all the time.
I really do. I try and I think I fail to take as well as I can dish out. But apparently that's not true. And I'm glad to hear that because my vision of myself is very skewed on the asshole level and I think I just come out that way.
But if that's what you get from what I give out, I'm frankly, I'm shocked. I really am, but I'm very happy that my skewed vision of myself isn't quite true to everybody. So that's very nice. Well, I think that's the whole object of this exercise in seeing other people's opinions of, I'm sorry, hearing, reading, I'm sorry, whatever, however their opinions are getting here because we are incredibly harder on ourselves and we don't see the good nearly as fast as we see the bad and the negative.
So that's why these ledges, because like I said, we don't stand on stage in front of our audience to where we can see their face and the reaction and what hits them and laughter and tears and hatred and anger and scorn. But when we hear these things and that's why I wanted us to process those together with the listeners to show you have a much bigger impact on people than I think you ever really thought you did. Wow, that's just, I'm struggling so hard to find the right way to accept that kind of stuff. I mean, you know what I mean?
Even Kazoo says she's a very people-pleasing person. Those of us out in life who have that issue that we try and please everybody, only we understand what torture the other person is going through when they get a comment. I just don't want to fucking be that person anymore boogie. I don't know how to do it yet, but this helps.
And I thank you to the listeners who wrote in like this to that post because it does push me to be a better person, to be a happier person. It's like four months away. I'm not going to be singing these songs as enthusiastically by December. Oh, thank God.