34 | Perfectionism & The Settled Place We're Seeking

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!Have you ever felt like you're constantly chasing a moment of peace, where everything on your to-do list is checked off, and you can finally relax? This pursuit of the 'settled place' might be more ingrained in your daily life than you realize. There's a way to shift from this endless cycle of striving for perfection to embracing an abundant boss mindset. A mindset that allows you to assume possibility, to believe that space and resources you need will be available to you, and to prioritize your own well-being alongside your ambitions.Join me as we unpack the layers of societal expectation that have taught us to stifle our emotions, to maintain composure at the cost of our authentic selves. I also share personal anecdotes and insights into how modeling emotional honesty can shape our environments, encourage others, and foster a culture of genuine well-being. Tune in to learn more. GEMS DROPPED“An ​abundant ​boss ​mindset ​is ​a ​mindset ​around ​leadership ​where you ​assume ​possibility. ​​You ​assume that ​the ​space ​you ​require ​is ​available ​to ​you. ​You ​assume ​that your ​needs ​shall ​be ​met. ​You ​assume ​that ​if ​you ​take ​up ​the ​space ​it’s ​gonna ​be ​okay. There's ​a ​way ​that ​we ​kind ​of ​assume ​that ​we ​can ​have ​our ​needs ​met ​and ​that the ​things ​get ​done… ​at ​the ​same ​damn ​time.” “Some ​of ​the ​most ​important ​mental resource ​tools ​I've ​honestly ​ever ​picked ​up ​were ​between ​therapy ​and ​the ​fact ​that ​I ​worked ​for ​four ​years ​at ​a ​mental ​health ​startup ​where ​I ​learned ​cognitive ​behavioral ​therapy (CBT) in and out.”“One ​of ​the ​greatest ​lessons ​that ​I ​learned in ​my ​coaching ​training is ​how ​emotions ​move. ​Emotions ​are ​emotions. ​There are ​no ​good ​emotions, there are ​no ​bad ​emotions… ​emotions ​are ​just ​energy. ​ ​They ​are ​energy ​that ​needs ​to ​flow ​through ​us. Our body ​is ​engaging ​with ​the ​world ​and ​energetically ​reacting ​to ​the ​experiences ​that ​we ​have, ​the ​relationships ​that ​we ​keep and ​when ​our ​emotions ​come ​up, ​as ​adults, ​we ​have ​been ​trained ​to work ​them ​on ​down, ​to ​make ​them ​feasible, ​to ​make ​them ​workable, ​or ​to ​shut ​them ​off, ​to ​shut ​ourselves ​off, ​and ​to ​go into numb ​mode ​just ​to ​survive ​the ​moment ​because ​we're ​not ​socially ​given ​the ​space ​to ​do ​much ​more ​than ​that ​on ​a ​da -to -day ​basis.”“This ​craving ​of ​arriving ​at ​the ​settled ​place, ​this ​desire ​to ​get ​ahead ​of ​this, ​to ​get ​to ​the ​point ​where you feel ​peace ​and ​confident ​and ​on ​top ​of ​things. ​I'm ​not ​saying ​there's ​anything ​wrong ​with ​that, ​but ​I ​think ​that ​what ​we ​are ​not ​recognizing ​in ​that ​process ​or ​in ​that ​craving ​is ​that ​it's ​not ​just ​so ​much ​as ​a ​desire ​to ​get ​to ​a ​place ​as ​it ​is ​I ​think ​a ​desire ​to ​get ​away ​from. Because ​what's ​happening ​is ​we're ​just ​scared ​to ​be ​present ​to ​what ​is so ​we ​need ​to ​get ​somewhere ​else where ​there ​aren't ​the ​complicated, ​hard ​feelings ​there. ​​Sadness ​is ​not ​there. ​Rage, anger ​and ​frustration ​are ​not ​there. ​It's ​just ​pure ​satisfaction ​and ​rest ​and ​peace, ​which ​we ​all ​deserve. ​And ​I ​want ​to ​argue ​today ​that ​we ​also ​deserve ​to ​have ​regular ​space ​to ​feel ​all ​of ​the ​other ​emotions ​as ​well.“STAY IN TOUCHCome and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].