357: Three Layers of Regulation for ADHD, with Jenna Free, CCC

Living in constant urgency can start to feel normal when you have ADHD. But what if so much of that struggle isn’t just ADHD… it’s a nervous system stuck in survival mode?In this conversation, I sit down with ADHD therapist Jenna Free to unpack what regulation really means and why it’s foundational for thriving with ADHD. We explore how so many ADHD symptoms overlap with fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses, and how that “double load” is what often makes life feel overwhelming and unmanageable.Jenna shares her three-layer framework for regulation, starting with the nervous system, moving into thoughts and beliefs, and finally into behavior. We talk about how rushing, people-pleasing, avoidance, and perfectionism are often signs of dysregulation, not character flaws. And more importantly, we talk about how to shift them in practical, doable ways.This episode also brings so much compassion to the role of beliefs like “I’m behind” and how those thoughts keep us stuck in cycles of stress and shutdown. You’ll hear how small, intentional shifts toward awareness, gentleness, and flexibility can create real, lasting change.For parents, this conversation is especially powerful. Jenna reminds us that our own regulation is the starting point, and that reducing urgency and overwhelm at home can make a meaningful difference for our kids.If you’ve been feeling stuck, exhausted, or like nothing is working, this episode offers a new lens and a hopeful path forward.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com and Regulated Kids.com — because it’s not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.Show notes and more resources at parentingadhdandautism.com/357Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.You can find additional resources at parentingadhdandautism.com. It's not just about the struggles, it’s about progress, one step at a time.