EPISODE · May 16, 2026 · 17 MIN
368. You Can’t Shame Someone Into Change - Pre-conetemplation stages of change mini series
from How I quit alcohol
The cycles of change mini series. Understanding the Precontemplation Stage of ChangeIn today’s episode we begin a mini series exploring the Stages of Change model developed by James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente.This series is for anyone navigating recovery, behaviour change, healing, nervous system work, or simply trying to understand themselves — or someone they love — with more compassion.In Episode 1 we explore the precontemplation stage: the stage where a person either does not yet recognise the behaviour as a problem, or they are not ready to change.We talk about:Why people stay attached to behaviours that hurt themThe protective role coping mechanisms can playWhy shame rarely creates sustainable changeThe nervous system’s role in resistance and defensivenessSupporting someone without enabling themThe difference between compassion and rescuingWhy readiness cannot be forcedHow curiosity can create more change than criticismThis episode is an invitation to soften judgement, both toward ourselves and others, and begin understanding behaviour through the lens of protection, safety, and human survival.JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR REFLECTIONIs there an area of my life where I’m defending a behaviour instead of examining it?What might this behaviour be doing for me emotionally, socially, or psychologically?Is there something I’ve been minimising because I’m afraid of what change might require?Have I confused shame with motivation?What would it look like to approach myself with honesty and compassion at the same time?And if you’re supporting someone else:Am I trying to force change, or create safety for honesty?For more resources such as coaching or to join the next HIQA challenge go towww.iquitalcohol.com.auFollow HIQA insta @howiquitalcohol Music for Podcast intro and outro written by Danni Carr performed by Mr CassidyIf you are struggling with physical dependancy on alcohol consider contacting a local AA meeting or a drug and alcohol therapist. Always consult a GP before stopping alcohol. If you need help supporting a family member or loved on in addiction consider reaching out to https://al-anon.org.au/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
What this episode covers
The cycles of change mini series. Understanding the Precontemplation Stage of ChangeIn today’s episode we begin a mini series exploring the Stages of Change model developed by James Prochaska and Carlo DiClemente.This series is for anyone navigating recovery, behaviour change, healing, nervous system work, or simply trying to understand themselves — or someone they love — with more compassion.In Episode 1 we explore the precontemplation stage: the stage where a person either does not yet recognise the behaviour as a problem, or they are not ready to change.We talk about:Why people stay attached to behaviours that hurt themThe protective role coping mechanisms can playWhy shame rarely creates sustainable changeThe nervous system’s role in resistance and defensivenessSupporting someone without enabling themThe difference between compassion and rescuingWhy readiness cannot be forcedHow curiosity can create more change than criticismThis episode is an invitation to soften judgement, both toward ourselves and others, and begin understanding behaviour through the lens of protection, safety, and human survival.JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR REFLECTIONIs there an area of my life where I’m defending a behaviour instead of examining it?What might this behaviour be doing for me emotionally, socially, or psychologically?Is there something I’ve been minimising because I’m afraid of what change might require?Have I confused shame with motivation?What would it look like to approach myself with honesty and compassion at the same time?And if you’re supporting someone else:Am I trying to force change, or create safety for honesty?For more resources such as coaching or to join the next HIQA challenge go towww.iquitalcohol.com.auFollow HIQA insta @howiquitalcohol Music for Podcast intro and outro written by Danni Carr performed by Mr CassidyIf you are struggling with physical dependancy on alcohol consider contacting a local AA meeting or a drug and alcohol therapist. Always consult a GP before stopping alcohol. If you need help supporting a family member or loved on in addiction consider reaching out to https://al-anon.org.au/ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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368. You Can’t Shame Someone Into Change - Pre-conetemplation stages of change mini series
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