378: 'It’s never been natural for me to reach out when I’m in the sh*t’ (ft. Jason Lange & Luke Adler)

When things are bad, are you good at asking for support?More than once, we've had clients disappear for a bit, and upon reappearing say things like, "Sorry, I just had one of the worst weeks of my life last week."And we wonder: Why, during some of your darker times, are you not reaching out for love?Here we break down the reasons why this pattern exists. Why is it so hard for men in particular to ask for help? What helps shift a man from this kind of pattern into a healthier one of interdependence?And how does all of this show up in a marriage, love relationship, or even in dating? Because make no mistake -- it does.If you want to be successful with women, be the best husband you can be, or just feel more settled, grounded, and confident when it comes to dating or relating, check this out.Support the podcast and join The Heart of Shadow at melaniecurtin.com/heartofshadowWork with usReady to go deeper than the podcast and take action? Jason and I can help you break old patterns and transform your sex & love life for good. To see if you're a fit for our flagship program, Pillars of Presence, book a call here. Start anytime. (https://evolutionary.men/apply/)---Memorable quotes from this episode:“You don’t know the love that you’re missing.”“I don’t want to share this because it could be ammo for attack.”“Men don’t want to be a burden, and ‘put their feelings on someone else.’”“I’ve been there — men hold it all inside.”“I gotta go back to that stoic man who doesn’t need other people.”“We don’t trust society. We don’t trust culture.”“So much of the wounding men carry come from peer relationships when they were young.”“When one man brings forth the truth or vulnerability, it inspires the other men.”“Every time a man disrupts this kind of culture, you’re lighting the way for another man.”“When we collapse and don’t reach out, there’s something in the background: This belief that there’s not enough. Not enough money, not enough money, not enough women.”“Is my wife gonna still love me tomorrow?”“What is masculinity? That’s the debate we’re having right now as a culture.”“It just leaps out of our hearts.”“It’s moving from ‘I am alone’ to ‘I belong.’”“By joining the group, you actually become more yourself.”“The shared value is: We want to grow.”“As I was running myself ragged, I was running my wife ragged.”“I’m just going to be here with you in it.”