380. You Attract What You Haven't Healed: How to Stop Picking the Wrong Partner with Dr. Becky Whetstone

What if the key to not repeating the past isn't finding the perfect partner but healing the patterns that led you to them in the first place?   In this episode of The Divorce Revolution Podcast, I'm joined by Dr. Becky Whetstone, a licensed marriage and family therapist and author of I Think I Want Out: What to Do When One of You Wants to End Your Marriage. We talk about what no one tells you about remarriage, why the divorce rate for second marriages is over 75%, and the subconscious patterns that make us attract partners who reinforce our unhealed wounds.   If you've been divorced and you want to do it differently next time, this episode is for you.   Resources Mentioned: I (think) I want Out: https://marriagecrisismanager.com/i-think-i-want-out/ Sign up for ReNewU waitlist to get early access: https://products.ambershaw.com/signature-waitlist Nail Your Niche: https://ambershaw.samcart.com/products/nail-your-niche Cured Nutrition use code AMBER for 15% off: https://www.curednutrition.com/   What I/We Discuss: Dr. Becky's background and the 75% second divorce rate Childhood trauma, emotional immaturity, and subconscious patterns Why we attract partners who reinforce our old wounds Boundaries, love languages, and the martyr mom trap Self-responsibility vs. self-blame after divorce The five stages of marital deterioration The power of preventative therapy in healthy relationships Triggers, abandonment wounds, and the power of awareness Blended family dynamics and the hidden emotional costs on kids Step-parenting, discipline, and parenting style clashes   Key Takeaways: "You don't attract what you want—you attract what you are." – Dr. Becky Whetstone "Most people don't need a new partner. They need a new level of emotional maturity." – Dr. Becky Whetstone "If you don't heal the wound, you'll keep choosing people who trigger it." – Dr. Becky Whetstone   Find more from Dr. Becky Whetstone: Website: https://marriagecrisismanager.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationshipcrisismanager/ X: https://x.com/DoctorBecky Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doctorbecky/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/becky-whetstone-ph-d-33866211/ Medium: https://medium.com/@doctorbecky   Find more from Amber: Instagram: @msambershaw Website: ambershaw.com  Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@msambershaw