384. Captain Save-A-Hoe & Queen Change-A-Dick: Lifelong Patterns That Harm Our Relationships with Kelly Gardner

It's tempting to want to play the role of "superhero" in a relationship - the guardian, the savior, the teacher, or the protector. But over-prioritizing their needs over your own often has a villainous effect on a healthy relationship. Because if all of your focus is on their safety, wellbeing and nurturing, you then neglect what's more important - your own.  My partner, Kelly Gardner, a Relationship Coach and Men's Group Facilitator, and I have identified two (comically labeled) archetypes of the kinds of superheroes we often see in relationships: -Captain Save-A-Hoe: the man here to "save" and "heal" a broken partner. -Queen Change-A-Dick: the woman on a mission to help the lost boy grow into a great man. Today we'll explain why you need to stop prioritizing your partner's needs over your own, and how the foundation of a healthy relationship is really built on focusing on yourself, first. In this episode, Kelly and I are talking about: Why men often want to feel like a "savior" in a relationship Power dynamics in relationships Why women often put aside their own needs in a relationship How to balance giving and receiving in a relationship Expanding your sense of self in a relationship Waiting to be chosen by someone How prioritizing yourself first contributes to a better relationship Managing sexual energy inside and outside your relationship Including your partner in your life How to make your partner feel chosen   Apply for Couples Coaching with Kelly & Emily CONNECT WITH KELLY GARDNER Website: https://www.kellygardner.com  Instagram @iamkellygardner FB: https://www.facebook.com/connectwithkellygardner    CONNECT WITH EMILY Book A Private Coaching Call With Emily To Work Together Get Your Free Guide "The Four Tools Missing From Your Relationship" here Join Emily's email list here Instagram: @emilygoughcoach Email: [email protected]             REFERENCES Episode 377 | Hope After Heartbreak: Our Love Story With Kelly Gardner Episode 359 | Building A Community Of Better & More Present Fathers With Kelly Gardner Episode 364 | Not All Men, But Almost Always With Traver Boehm Of Man UNcivilized