4. Too Deep for Small Talk (Part One) - Why We Crave Depth and Struggle on the Surface

Ever felt like you’re too serious to enjoy everyday chit-chat? Too awkward to keep small talk flowing? Too deep to feel satisfied by the surface stuff?Yeah. Us too.In this episode of Too Much, Apparently, we (Carly and Alice — two therapists and recovering perfectionists with squishy brains) get real about why small talk feels exhausting, why depth feels nourishing, and what it’s like to long for connection in a world that often prefers keeping things light.We unpack our teenage memories, awkward family gatherings, existential spirals mid-conversation, and that magical feeling when something you say actually lands.This time we talked about:🎙️ We’ve felt this thing too (and we still do): struggling with small talk at family events, joking about mortality in the wrong moment, and laughing way too hard at our own jokes.👀 What it looks like in real life: standing in silence after going “too deep,” feeling on the outside in groups, or lighting up when someone finally meets you in the big conversations.🧠 Why our brains do it: sensitivity, nervous system wiring, neurodivergence, past experiences of not belonging, and the search for meaning.🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏻 The different ways it shows up: craving vulnerability, asking big questions too soon, longing for real connection, and sometimes masking with humour or deflection.🧰 Coping mechanisms: inviting others to depth gently, finding “your people,” using humour as a bridge, and making peace with being different.🌱 How to make peace with it: Wanting depth isn’t a flaw — it’s how some of us are wired to connect, and that’s something worth valuing.BOOK MENTIONED: BETTER SMALL TALK BY PATRICK KINGThanks for listening           💛💜🩷🩵🧡💬 New episodes every Monday.🎧 Follow now to join the conversation.🧡 CONNECT WITH US 🎙️ Podcast socials: → Instagram: @toomuchapparently → TikTok: @toomuchapparently → YouTube: Too Much, Apparently → Website: www.toomuchapparently.com👩‍💻 Carly Radford: → Website: www.carlyradford.com → Instagram: @the_sensitivity_therapist👩🏻‍💻 Alice Tew: → Website: www.alicetew.com → Instagram: @reparentingwithalice📩 Email us: [email protected] 🗓️ New episodes every MondayThis is a podcast that says: bring your too-muchness… we’re here for it.Disclaimer: Just a quick note to say this podcast isn’t therapy, and it’s not a substitute for professional support. We’re here to share ideas and experiences, but if you’re struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support service near you.—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------sensitivity podcast, overthinking podcast, perfectionism podcast, therapy podcast, anxiety podcast, emotional podcast, mental health podcast, deep chat podcast, neurodivergent podcast, autism podcast, adhd podcast, audhd podcast, Too Much Apparently podcast