let the faking of emotions begin. Say it with me. Loud and proud. Hi.
You made it. We do it ladies and gentlemen. Oh my gosh. It's these rare moments where we just start recording in the middle of all of our personal crisis.
You know why because you're here and you're waiting for a show and we respect that. We appreciate that. We love you but just know sometimes before that button gets pushed. There's just fucking chaos.
There's some chaos and shit and that I mean, it's kind of part of the story. part of the amazingness of doing a show to have an excuse because normally we can just run off into our fucking craziness and be really upset and you just go down but there's something about knowing the show must go on stuff that there's been so many times I've been in the middle of a panic attack or a suicide or just like just so much just insane and then you just push that button and know it can wait. Yes. It can wait because and then by the end of it, Path Girl is going to not want to kill herself or me or her family and I don't want to kill you but the other two are questionable.
Alright well it's just it's so rare that the shoes on the other foot it's always me you know that's like what's it like to be clinically insane I'd like to know well clinically clinically speaking it has its ups and downs but in general a lot of creative thoughts a lot of things that most people don't think of and some extra voices so but here we are here we are Path Girl are you ready are you ready to just take in that deep breath breathe with me baby come on I'm going to turn on my inner spongebob and say I'm ready well then fucking a let's rock this show one two three four do you feel your sex life is quite lame scared that your desires might be strange come and join the kinky world of play. Get those yas I'm going to get you laughing by the end of the show or I'm going to virtually send you a brofinger one of the other what what's come on now brofinger will cheer you up no just like it what if my arm could like just literally go through the internet and just the fingers pop out and you've never seen my fingers you know no oh sorry welcome to Bird and Podcast the show where you explore the adventures of the kinky life style sex in the human mind recording on Zen cast there were coming this fall to a streaming service to you from the makers of Naked and Afraid the new series Kinky and Exhausted I'm Path Girl I am brofinger no no finger no finger you know I talked to Mew today because now now she's a doctor of course so so and and she got her dream location and everything so that's real cool did I talk about it on the show I probably talked about it on the show I mean you might have talked about it on the patron show I don't know baby I don't know but to all of our good Jewish daddy to but yes to all of our perverted podcast listeners Mew the OG who was here from show one for many many shenanigans mayhem lovers and everything has passed her tests done her thing finished med school graduated and is now a doctor and so she's Dr. laser snake that is the name I gave her long ago and I've been calling her that for literally seven nine years but so yeah so we were talking today and she had the audacity like she hasn't been on the show in four years because she's been in med school but she still touches basin you know and you know talks to me about all we talk you know every week three times a week so I'm still pretty close cool and because I'm hot how can you how can you deny well I know she's with her new dude whatever that fucking whatever um you know I know I know she's still pines for me I don't know what that means but I think pining means you really really still want this guy but you know you just can't I'm pretty sure she still want what was I talking about anyway she didn't know what brofinger was and then I realized maybe it's been a while since I've explained to our perverted podcast listeners what brofinger was brofinger is when you have a friend that absolutely is not attracted to you but you're so horny that you need to come this is for a female by the way that has a vagina and she's like look I'm disgusted by you as a person but you're my friend and I need to get off so can you just reach over without looking me in the eye and finger me while I'm masturbate that's called brofinger because that's something you do for a bro they just need to get off see student names of delusional and desperate yeah but who's not me I'm not that delusional and desperate whatever you were at one time you totally were at one time so uh so seeing as you're mislike ho out the dough um why don't you that that was the worst probably the four I'm just gonna stop trying to be funny forever Conan O'Brien I am not god years ago don't worry about it Jesus Christ so did you fuck at all this week or last week yeah actually last weekend I did a scene with Donis over at Doc and Cat's house we haven't had a scene in a while yes yes yes details details details details yeah we've actually been trying to see for quite a while and between the null I'm trying to kill me and my body trying to kill me it's just not the work that and that basically he told me like I think I was like Wednesday's like you know we're playing Saturday right he's like you're not playing with Doc you're playing with me I'm like oh certain the dominance the Donna dominance whatever it's not being funny you're not Conan so details keep going yes so we went over to Doc and Cat's house they have usually like a monthly or a bi monthly party and we decided to do it was on the cross yeah it was on the cross actually so took out let's see the rubber tire flogger thing that we have nice we also had the wooden cheese board oh actually got to break in our new cane that we got it was like a kinky Christmas white elephant gift the cane that we got so he's never came before so it was nice to kind of play around with that and try that out very good so now is it a reton cane yes reton by the way is a type of I guess a type of bamboo bamboo splinters but reton is the non splintering you know organic they make wicker furniture and stuff out of it because it bends really nicely and it gives a great response so so that was the type of cane he had on you yeah it's actually got a really pretty tiger strike pattern too so it's kind of a thicker cane it's not you know can't be anywhere from like a really thin whipy stick to like really thick and bulky this sure sure but gave me a nice warm up with the rubber flogger and the cheese board there's a fourth or another one it was no it was not a finger so but gave me a nice warm up and actually was doing some interesting things with the big cheese board battle where he was kind of like turning it sideways and kind of thumping a little bit there to get the skin warm up yeah yes yes that's that's called good instincts yes yes because that's you get a whole different level of weight and you can turn a stingy toy into a thudy toy it's the same thing when you do that with like those big five gallon paint sticks that we use like a lot of people they they use it as the smacky but if you literally turn it sideways it becomes a thudy cane yes you know so that's and that's just something you kind of as your fiddling always fiddle with your toys always look at your toys from a different point of view and you will usually find that that toy can do 20 different things oh yeah oh yeah one of the fun things that doc likes to do on me in a lot of the bottom city place with is he takes his dragon tail and he'll double it up and then kind of use it as a like a thudy instrument instead so it's kind of interesting so gave me a nice good warm up and I'm going to warm up and then started going to the cane and he was a little hesitant first because especially every all of our tribe was kind of watching him so he was kind of like spotlight was on him but I just basically said just give me a couple of taps and a whack couple of taps and a whack and just kind of bury it up and down and he started getting into it and I have had some nice little cane marks across my butt I mean it got to the point you know he was ramping up very well where he was kind of going slow and then he would kind of like whack whack whack whack you know it's kind of like getting a little bit harder yeah very good yeah I actually I do remember what the fourth toy was and it's actually a brand new thing we just purchased up when we were at the hunt it kind of looks like a metal belt it's like these triangular shaped metal pieces that have leather wrapped around them oh you can whip it kind of like you like you were doing with the chainsaw floggers but the their foot the metal are flat so it was extremely stingy and it's also got the um the finger flogger kind of finger holders so you can you can quarantine with it so it was kind of he doesn't know how to quarantine yet he doesn't learn that scale yet but he was actually just kind of using it and kind of just whipping from side to side and the good thing about this is a lot of times when you do stuff that's whippy you have to be careful where you don't wrap your bottom whether it be a whip or whether it be a dragon tail this you can actually whip with it and it had enough weights where well it was wrapping around my body it was slowing down so it kind of just flick the other side of my body just give a little bit of a pain but it wasn't one of these full body wraps oh my god those are auto reds with a single tail oh yeah oh yeah auto reds oh my god but the whole thing about it left me these really nice triangular shaped patterns on my thighs and it got to the point toward the end of the scene I felt myself slipping a bit I was getting a little spacey and when I go spacey kind of like I start going non-verbal my arms start to droop I start to kind of like lean into the cross and you'll see that I'm not as reactive to the hits and stuff right then finally like he kind of like cuddled up on me for a minute he's like are you done and I was like yeah I'm done nice so he poured me off the cross poured me into a chair and Doc being a good assistant Dom before I'm cooking look at that fucking team for tag teaming you take the high road I'll get the cookie yes it's not after care if there's no cookie damn it I aren't hate no hate no hate at all that sounds like a fantastic I think you were trying to explain that toy to me and I couldn't figure out and yeah I'm gonna send you a picture of it it it really looks like a flat metal belt and a piece of metal triangular but they're all wrapped in leather but there's pieces of metal sticking out and it's got two finger flogger for a Florentine stuff it's really interesting toy I was just kind of and as soon as I saw it I said oh I'll bet that he's thinking I took two three I said I'm like yeah you're coming home with me oh my gosh there's and in retrospect I probably should have gotten two because I'm like hey Doc you know how to Florentine you want to try Florentine with ease oh my god you know I have a one minute video back to Florentine go to our you send them to our YouTube page and I'll teach them how to Florentine in one minute wow it takes one minute there are people look if you can count to four you can Florentine it's not it looks difficult because you're kind of twisting your hands but the trick to Florentine for anyone that is trying to figure out how to Florentine by the way for our new listeners who don't know what the fuck we're talking about Florentine is when you have a flogger which is that thing with all the falls and tails on it and you have it on each hand so you have two of them and you're doing it in this rotating pattern that's like a figure eight and so it's it's using two handed flogging technique and so the Florentine is like a one and two and one and two and one and two so the trick for those of you that know what Florentine is but don't know how to do it is the only trick is you don't cross your hands when you count either one is your your left or right whichever one you use one is always on the top going back and forth and the other is on the bottom so it looks like they're crossing over each other because you're kind of swaying but it's not so you're just going you're just going forward forward back back forward forward back back and that's how you Florentine one minute people teach two hour classes and have all these stupid fucking explanations and they act like they know all this fucking shit and then everyone's confused it's not hard you just don't cross the hands that is the trick yeah so yeah because doggo for not only Florentine with bloggers he Florentine with dragon tails that's yes yes that's I mean it is something that you got to work at oh definitely you know obviously it's something you have to learn but to start start with your fingers and just practice going forward forward back back and remember do not cross the hands one stays on top one stays on the bottom forward forward back back forward with just your fingers against the wall and then you can roll up two t-shirts so you have a little bit of a like a tail but you don't have a crazy 50 tails like a floger and then just practice with that forward back back forward back back forward back back and then practice kind of twisting a little bit and rotating until you get that feel and then you pick up the floggers and lo and behold you can now two handed vlog it is it is when I figured out the trick after all the time I spent trying to figure it out I was like oh it's not that special it looks cool it looks amazing and it feels amazing but it really really really isn't that hard so don't if you're if you see people doing it know that you can do it too as long as you can count to four and don't cross your hands that's about the best explanation I can give without showing it to you but I do have a video on our YouTube channel the perverted podcast YouTube channel that says teach you how to do this in a minute and it gives you the basics and then you can go practice on your own and it really is a great skill to know because bottoms do do love themselves some two handed vlogging once again my love has okay so now we're about 20 minutes into the show so path girl you came into the show out of chaos immediately out of chaos into the show are you feeling a little better yes I'm feeling better thank you I'm in my kinky subby bubble I don't care what exists outside my bubble I'm in my happy place I have cookies I have fogging I have learning team I'm happy thank you very good it just goes to show togetherness brofinger that was such a dis never mind I didn't want to get into it topic it's just the revulsion that you have that between everyone that I offer brofinger to that acts like I'm losing weight I'm gonna be hot real soon you just wait but fuck it we have a reddit we have an amazing reddit a reddit I'll give my catchphrase after because somebody I love it when people ask questions and they're like has this ever happened to anyone else yeah yeah so I'll just read this and then we'll be able to laugh about this in a minute because it's a great topic and we thought we haven't had a long time I think my Dom is trying to date me romantically hmm my Dom is absolutely amazing the sex foreshadowing is wild and fun but recently started to get like loving and passionate and she's like I have no problem with it it's hot she likes it but their chats are going from like super sexual to now he's like saying I wish I was cuddling you right now instead of planning their next play night he's like wants to do dinner in a movie no and she's like I've never had this happen I'm not opposed to it that's good I just don't know if it will ruin our sub dynamic and then she asks has this happened to anyone else okay if there's a person in the room who's not raising their hand I'm like it's called you fucking engage all of the mating rituals that have biologically caused connection attachment love you do all of those things all of the sex all of the everything it's pretty common yes that that one or the other or both is going to start getting attached and it's going to not be as business as usual because that's how humans work yeah well a lot of people like to leave their kinko you know separate from their sex yes and that that's surely a big trick so I'll let you jump in first because this there's nothing wrong with this right especially because she's into it but there are ways to definitely things to ask yourself and then ways to mitigate that if you're not into it yeah and it's just when you start out in a de-s relationship and this is something I struggled with for years until you and I kind of talked off the air I always associated kink with sex because I only did kink with my partners and after really long talks with you and talks to myself I finally started to step out of my comfort zone and started doing the kink without the sex now I do scenes with doc I do not have sex with him I love the guy to death I hug on him he's grabbed every part of my anatomy I could think of but we do not have sex I still love him I would cuddle with him on a couch but there's nothing sexual there even though we're kind of trading on sexual territory right don is obviously I have the sexual relationship with because we're boyfriend and girlfriend that you know we have sex and the kink I think what the problem is here is that nothing was laid out in the beginning as far as like are we doing kink with sex are we doing kink without sex if we're doing kink with sex like the whole action of sex releases oxytocin that's that cuddle hormone that's that one after you know you sit there and you want to cuddle with the partner you just have sex with that's completely normal but there is cuddling you know after a scene which is part of after caring it's all great and whatever you separate you're fine and then there's that lingering like oh I wish they were here now and that's like yeah now that could be part of sub-drop or top drop I mean maybe he's just getting a little drop you like I wish she was here right now so I could cuddle her so definitely a conversation in order yeah and once again the the the top drop is is an important thing to mention because that's obviously but the bottoms aren't the only people that drop tops drop too and they can feel needy and lonely and like giant boceys but uh did I say that how it kind of did yeah whatever fuck him fuck me because I never feel like I never never have felt needy because I am a pure true dominance that is always in charge of my facilities I'm lying but uh so yeah that's normal but our poster has mentioned that now he's talking about dinner in a movie instead of play scenes so that's where we can kind of catch the hints that he is starting to move into looking at her differently and is starting to get those nesting emotions with this person which once again completely normal if you do all these activities your body doesn't know there's a lot of parts of your brain you have many parts of your brain that all function differently and do and a few of them have their own personalities so they're not all just you know the heart and lungs and whatever there's different parts of your ego and things like that that are all triggered when you do these mating behaviors when you have sex when you have intensity with someone when you survive an incident with someone which that's what your body thinks a place he is you know because there's aggression and pain and primelness and these things your body doesn't know oh this is just for funsies yeah so it's very normal like you said for that oxytocin endopamine to mix and you can get uh loopy now then just like you said obviously this is a conversation that you should start if you're going to include sex in your dynamic this is one of those know thyself things if you are somebody that falls in love relatively easy that is maybe you're a little lonely you just got out of relationship or you're longing to be in a relationship those types of things don't lie to yourself that you can go and have all of the things with somebody plus kink so you got to remember that that adds to it too because now you have this thing that you can completely relate to someone and there's all of this power exchange and vulnerability and so on either end of course once again more things that connect you more things that make you go this person is great for me and those parts of your brain are all you should marry this part side this is your partner you know for however long this is it so if you know you're somebody like that you're going to need to set up boundaries you're going to need to set up things that you do not go past and a lot of times that is sex or if it's that you know it can be if you know yourself well enough you're like okay well you can make me come with a vibrator but if you kiss me then that's a trigger for a lot of emotion and connection with me so there's i literally know women that are like you can analefist me but don't fucking kiss me when i was in the swingers lifestyle it was kind of strange to me where there'd be couples that i would swap with with my ex-husband and they'd be like yeah you can we can fuck but we can't kiss each other and i'm like let me get this straight you can insert your penis into my vagina which to me is like hella intimate but i can't kiss you because that's too intimate what the what you know and it's just it's to me it's strange we obviously respect boundaries okay fine right but you know it's it's one of those times you're gonna have that as the kiddies call out the dtr to find the relationship where it's basically like going forward are we gonna do the kink without the sex are we gonna do the kink with sex if we're gonna do the kink what is this relationship i've known plenty of people who have started out his dominance of and then wound up becoming boyfriend and girlfriend husband and wife whatever long-term relationship that is so but it's just a matter of other people from the same page where he's like yeah i like you as a girlfriend potential wife whatever long-term partner and i still want to kink with you where she may be in the mindset of i just want you to be my dominant yes i obviously care about you in his relationship there but as far as long as something long-term you know so it's gonna be a little bit awkward but yeah because it will kill the hotness of that dynamic if one of you is into it and the other isn't like in this case it seems to be she kind of wants this she's not opposed to it but the question of whether or not this is going to affect the the dynamic that depends on your relationship if he goes into full nesting mode like because it can kill the hotness for dominant it happens a lot where the dominant is all gurr i'm in control and now he's loopy now he's like no i love her i want to just because now you were the person that violated them and now you want to be like the lovey dov protector and if you're somebody that gets really romantic in your relationships then that is actually killed the dominant energy in a lot of relationships some of us just turn into daddies and we can do it both and that's hopefully the best of both worlds if you're into that because i have to really prepare because i am a very sexual player i do like to be intimate i do like to have all that gurr and rough stuff and slam you against the wall and pull your air and bite you and then i do like to cuddle you and be sweet and tell you that you're a good girl and that you did well and if you and if those are triggers for you then we can't do that and i've had people that i've played okay i'm gonna be the asshole dominant and after that i'm gonna make sure you're okay get your water give you a cuddle for a little bit and then fuck off because it's gonna that's we need to do that well and i've even known some dominance that will right off the bat will say listen i will make sure you get aftercare but i will not do any cuddling or whatever like i'll come checking on you like almost having like a designated cuddler if you wear a mask like it's one of your friends here is one of your partners here where i physically can have you sit with them and cuddle with them and i'm gonna come and get you got that's a water come check on you and what have you but there's been a couple of dominance along the way i've known it's just basically like i don't cuddle because that opens up too many doors for me and it would be the same way with the submisses where the submisses are in a very vulnerable position and some guy comes in and cuddles on her and him or her and they're like oh wow this is awesome and it's turning into something i completely unexpected it it is not something to take lightly because you are kind of just playing with evolution basically like this is just how nature works you do all of these things in those parts of your brain go oh this is a quality mate i should stay with them and breed and grow create and and have monkey sex and then nest for however long until we get sick of each other and then that love ends and then it's disastrous what? i'm just you know it's actually doesn't last forever yeah that's the other problem if you're somebody that's very romantic and then because that's what could happen you could get very romantic it could be all hot and beautiful and lovey and the earth stands still when you guys are in a room together which is obnoxious and disgusting and then all of a sudden one or the other of you that that just dissipates and then you're like i don't even want to play with you anymore i've seen it yeah but i've seen it the other way where it's been like people that didn't think they would be compatible together or long-term compatible it's just a matter of it doesn't have to ruin the dom sub dynamic it just needs to be further discussed and outlined where it's basically like you if you want to learn through dynamic oh yeah definitely it will but you don't have to let it ruin the dynamic it may just evolve into something different well i'm i agree with you 85 oh okay because there's sometimes you can set out with the best intentions and your brain or their brain or your brains together just go i don't give a fuck about your plans yeah true you know there are people because there's times where you're like i'm going to handle myself well and i'm going to come in and we're going to do this and we did all the thing by the BDSM book and we negotiated and we both said no no you're in college and i'm doing this and we don't have time for a relationship and blah blah blah and we're going to do this and then all of a sudden you're like i just love her i just just want to be with her i'm supposed to home huh i'm supposed to be with her not not in a long long time but oh yes absolutely i have uh yeah i i used to be really romantic before my soul burnt and uh and now i don't have to worry about that um because i don't have a soul anymore i don't have a soul there's no soul it's wonderful i don't have a problem like even mew all the ones like i'll be buttered for a couple weeks and then i'm literally like oh okay i'm fine like i even had a long drawn out heartbreak thing in jackets and it's amazing amazing path girl there is nothing better than never being in love again there is nothing in the world better than that i need to put in that old disclaimer that cathia used to put in words like the words of the book you do not represent perverted podcast they do in love the oxy is not in love it's a chemical reaction in your brain that makes you an idiot and hopefully it works out and there's enough bonding and work together and there's enough for the actual love where it's the actions of love and the care and the concern and the consideration but that in love is a fucking chemical it is not love it is a chemical of connection and euphoria and that is going to end at some point when especially once you're established you're mated you've squirted out kids all of those things that goofy lovey stuff if you don't have a base of all of the good stuff and communication and partnership and work at that base those chemicals are going to end and if that's the only fucking thing that you're relying on to keep you together get a watch and start counting the minutes because it's gonna fucking end and it usually ends disastrously because now i'm like being yours on my part yes you guys talk about like i'm an idiot i am an idiot but i do know that in love is very different than love yeah and uh i'm cool i never do it so i you don't need the catheic disclaimer it's just basically you need to be further clarified but i thank well thank you thank you very much for hearing me out i appreciate it fantastic topic and once again nature is nature you do your best to set those benchmarks and restrictions if you need them and ultimately if it doesn't work out and one falls in love and the other then you have to reevaluate what you're gonna do sometimes it's gonna end the hotness it's gonna end the relationship because one doesn't want to do what the other wants to do and that's just the name that's just part of fucking dancing with the devil that's just part of it path girl finished with a final statement you do not get to let me have the last word running with devil that's the only thing i popped in my head when you're that and also wait if it's something about like all this nature stuff does that mean we get to do it like we do it on the discovery channel oh wow good callback actually there i go that was a good song that really big hits go look at the bloodhound gang people shit is kinky world news a social enigma i don't know let's ask enigma you should know because he's got the same name enigma's jumping on a pop dart tump-pump-pump-pump-pump-pump-tard that's the text i get perverted podcast audience enigma is so casual he's just like i'm just here chomping on a pop dart if you're ready to go i'm down what flavor pop dart really sets the pace for how this is going to go though okay so i think i'm an outlier here but i like unfrosted either's strawberry or blueberry doesn't matter um but but then i'm gonna put it in the in the toaster and i come out and then i'm gonna like drench it in butter and then the butter basically becomes the frosting and it's just so good Jesus heart attack christ hey it's the same heart attack you get from the frosting it's fine it's you know what however you work however you work this out in your brain works for me works just fine believe me you don't have to talk to me about denial and justification of health issues but that actually sounds quite delicious i even had sugar processed sugar in about a month now so uh so pretty much you could literally just put the crust of a pop dart on a plate and uh i would be like that's the best thing i've ever eaten but uh so but which flavor was it blueberry um i think i have strawberry i think that's the one i got blueberry has flavonoids you know and that helps brain activity so i don't know what strawberry helps other than that it's strawberry and it tastes really good but i digress that's how we got into the show with pop tarts and health conscious eating decisions but the most important thing is your penis your gadget penis go go gadget enigma penis did it have any activity this week um it did actually um so one of the things that my my partner because like i've talked about that we're both very switchy and my partner d has actually been getting into rope a lot more um and so this week we went down to a local uh rope tying club that that is here in LA called a double mast society oh so i was gonna just say was it double mast yeah it was double mast and uh it was just kind of like a casual rope jam where like everybody there was just gonna like practicing stuff and and so yeah she she tied up she put on like a chest harness and a leg harness um if if we're friends on fat life you can go see a picture of it um but yeah it was a lot of fun i i am very much enjoying the the submission of that um of being bound in in the rope and um yeah it's it's been a very interesting uh journey of i don't know i don't know if i feel like a rope bunny but i i don't know if there's another name for that but like i i'm definitely enjoying being inside out and i want to do that more yeah hmm maybe a uh a rope sea creature i don't know a manta ray that's what i was it okay that's all i was looking for that of course that's now gone moments gone i was gonna say ooh a sea manatee but then i'm calling you fat so that you know i had to try to think of something else you're not you're not that fat so uh i mean eat enough of those butter coating all right i suppose you might get a little closer but that's a lot of fun and devil mask is really cool devil mask is uh i i don't want to speak out of out of you know out of knowledge but from my knowledge of devil mask society is that it's a rope uh community and they're very big on education and then they teach um and then if you are part of their you know they teach you it's kind of expected that you're now going to teach so it's like passing on good information and uh quality uh skills to other people they have a whole program that you go through it's like a year program i almost was able to get into it like they were talking to me and then i realized oh wait a minute i have commitment issues and uh and so i said i can't i can't do this um but it's a great program people that go through that um i mean at the end of that year there's a lot of work and a lot of practice and you need to have a partner that you can practice on but it's actually at the end of that year you're you're gonna know rope yeah you're gonna have a lot of great skills that literally you are never going to not have people that are in the rope especially if you can do it well and you can make it feel really good and and it's safe and you don't kill people um rope is it i just never had i just i gotta be honest i mean i i like doing rope i love i love little rope and some harnesses and whatever and i used to be a fu domo mo i used to be able to do the fu domo's and some of the things but to go to those next levels like suspension and other than basic basic suspension um you know that it really does that takes some practice that takes some skill and some understanding of physiology but fantastic yeah and uh we we've got we also went last week as well um to a to an actual class and yeah they're they were very thorough and then like when d was like practicing some of the stuff they were teaching um they were very good about like coming over and like not just doing it for her but like showing her how to do it and then making her do it um like so like you're saying it was very it was a very good uh training but also of his very safe space also i was like i'd seen pictures and i knew it was a nice place but like compared to like where it is in downtown LA it is surprisingly nice in in their in their space um because it's downtown LA and if you've never been to LA it's not downtown it's not the prettiest it's not great it's not a good wrapper uh you know the cream filling inside may be really tasty but the candy wrapper outside is not is not pretty and probably smells like a number of body fluids uh at any given moments that is that is our fine city at least the city city part you know once you get to where there's a little more space and things can air out it's not as bad but uh yeah there are places but uh yeah actually uh apple who used to come on the show actually came on the show and suspended new like my favorite like i call her the president of rope like if i won the lottery i'd be like apple i have to buy you and be the president of rope and we will do and she will be in charge her and Sandra from Chinese in trouble um would be my my rope my rope deities uh because they were just so awesome and apple does just amazing suspensions and uh because i couldn't so i'm like okay well mu wants to do this so you're gonna have to higher up that's great yeah fucking rope now i'm looking literally i'm looking over to my rights and there's a bag of rope big bag big big big big bag and i was just sitting there saying hey you know get your shit together there are some maybe you'll be able to use me so other than the rope anything magical that you do uh no that was kind of the the magic at least at least in the potato world over the last couple weeks oh that's man that's cool though that's pretty good that we do have a good newbie topic okay and uh and that's why i i knew you would be great for this because we've both experienced this maybe even on some uh some levels uh been this because when you're new it's kind of like people only know what they know and they don't know what they don't know so you can get in trouble when you think that what they know is all that there is to know you know kind of thing and uh this is one of those and it's it's so common it's so common especially among newbies and there is a right way to deal with it and a very wrong way to deal with it if i if i will say this so i saw a post on the reds and it was how do you deal with subs that say they're into quote unquote everything and then he goes on to say sometimes i have sub coming to me online hint and when i ask what they're into uh you know a big amount of them say oh they're into everything and then he's like well i'm into a lot of extreme kinks so i always ask if they're sure but then i accept uh you know express some of my hardcore kinks and then they always block me which is funny um and so he goes on to talk about ads better that way because communication and blah blah blah and if they can't communicate i don't want to deal with it which is true but he's just wondering how we deal with this yeah and uh this is a great question because once again it's very very common to come in and be excited and you know what you know and you kind of maybe can get in trouble because you don't know that maybe other people have been here longer or are more nefarious and are going to use that against you yeah so how do you deal with that because obviously there's there's a lot of people do this if you want to make sure you never play with a person then you act like a snobby fucking belittling cunt and you say oh can i cut your arm off or you think just there's i've heard story after story of doms and how they get so full of themselves and they hear this and they just belittle the person like knock them down uh and talk shit and then nobody wants to think they're stupid so they go away right right so they're like well fuck you if i'm an idiot then i don't feel sexy anymore so yeah you can belittle someone and tell them they're an idiot for saying they're into everything when they don't know stuff or how do you deal with it so i i i have definitely like i remember my very very very very very very first BDSM 101 class and the the guy that was teaching he did the same sarcastically when you're talking about where he was like if you tell me that i'm into everything he was like oh so you you want me to beat you over the head with this Dubai floor while i stake your chance to the floor and i'm just like that seems like an extreme example but okay to get the point um but i i also relate to the the online part of this conversation because especially during covid we had a lot of people i was in several like servers that kind of popped up because of covid and it was a lot of people were like finally sitting down and like looking at the shit that they were kind of curious about for years and they started like really really digging into it but they had no way to express that and so they were like coming into these into these like kinks just for servers and being like hey i'm into anything and everything let's do let's do level this and this and they quickly found out what anything and everything is because maybe they were just looking at very basic like kink.com kind of stuff and even kink.com like porn hub kinky stuff where it's right maybe some slap slapping stuff maybe some nasty stuff like but it wasn't the super edgy stuff and so they weren't expecting to get in front of it and then they get burnt out and scarred.
Sure. And i think one thing that is one thing that i i'm glad that i started doing in my own kink life is i have this digital i have basically a questionnaire that i will send to the people that i'm going to play with and that questionnaire has a lot of like what are you into right now what are your safety parameters or things that are triggering and i've actually had i played with a couple of newer folks and like that's sort of breaking the uh breaking the scene down basically or breaking their kinks down into those situations actually help them to to figure out like oh okay maybe maybe i'm not into that. Yeah because because i have a couple of questions there that are a little redundant but they're redundant on purpose because you're supposed to i'm trying to get them to like think about stuff in a different way if they're if they're a newer a newer player and so it's i think if you're if you're somebody who finds yourself being like having these like newer folks attracted to you on some capacity either you're an educator or you've shown yourself to be a safe person to play with and so the new people are kind of attracted to that i i think um i think that this guy's approach being like hey uh oh so you're into everything here how about i'm i'm really into anal fisting um i don't know what he gives them but like says that and then that makes them block him like so i i think that if you start from a a place of trying to learn so maybe maybe this first scene is a taster scene and so like just start with the basics in the bag the vloggers the canes the paddles and just do like a sensation play kind of taster and then once you like once you can help them figure out like which end of the stinging buddy you think that they enjoy then you can start kind of like going into the harder stuff but like coming in with um whether you're honestly whether you're a dom or a sub i think it's important to start with the basics um find out what sensations you like what sensations you don't like because of like just with a vlogger and a cane and a paddle you're gonna figure out like what feels good across the spectrum and then you can kind of start working your way through other kinds of sensations and then same thing if you're like like the anal fisting thing it's like if you're if you want to try bigger and bigger insertables great but you still want to start with the small dilators like get you to a point that's gonna actually be safe and enjoyable as opposed to damaging that's where i think i agree with so many things that you said um because it really is about the success versus ego because i came into this lifestyle and you know i knew some stuff but i as i've said a billion times i didn't come into this lifestyle as a genius i didn't come into this lifestyle knowing everything and what i found in the lifestyles how much i didn't know but the people that allowed me to safely discover those things for myself built my confidence and took down my defensiveness because when you humiliate someone and you just act like a dick then you you don't help anyone you don't because once again like you said you you know they burn out and then they go away i just feel like an idiot i probably don't belong here if you let them discover that everything doesn't mean everything to them then you're gonna have a better time building that trust with somebody because when there's when they're in that like oh i'm into think you know that's part of the flirt you're now in the mating ritual with somebody you're now like starting to build the sexiness so you kind of know like i know go with me on this see if this makes me i know that i'm not gonna try to fuck this person up so i have until the end of that first scene like you talked about and we're gonna do things that aren't too crazy and we'll we're gonna explore a lot of things i know that i'm gonna have this person's best interest at heart after the scene you can then start talking about the everything stuff and build more and say hey have you ever been curious about this have you ever been curious about this but when you're going into that scene like you said if you just come in a little lower and just be like oh everything is a lot well did you know start small have you do you like spanking like don't start with the like oh well i'm really into barbed wire blood play vampire clubs and burning because then you're gonna freak them out yeah but if you let that build if you start at the bottom and then have them say yes yes yes and you guide them into that one or two where they're like i don't know about that instead of going ha ha you see you darned into everything you dumb fucking slut um now you have allowed them to make that discovery but you're not doing it in a demeaning way so now you're going okay well well you don't like that okay fine blow it off fine but you do like these things so let's go ahead like you said let's try some of these things and if they do in that negotiation and conversation if they keep her like okay no no i really want to be this and that and i really studied this and that you can you know that's what negotiation i can't i can't say enough how goddamn sexy negotiation is how empowering is how how it just gives you so much permission to be primal in so many ways because you now know where we can go and you don't have to have as many awkward moments of like try on some random shit and then having them freak out and kill everything so i i just i love this topic because i've seen so many people approach it with ego and then once again you have also it is important to let these individuals know that there's a lot out there that maybe they don't know and you also need to let them know as they are learning these things that there's also a lot of people out there who are going to use that to abuse them and then justify it when they say they don't like it you said you were into everything so i just started fucking you in the ass during this play scene you know you said you were into everything what you can't you can't there's nothing wrong i didn't do anything wrong you said you were into everything and then that backwards fucking victimization manipulation comes in and that there's a lot of those people out there so i just approaches so much in in this and i just really wanted us to you have any final thoughts on that no i i think you definitely hit on hit on some good ones it's this is uh this is definitely a a condition of like the the negotiation before you play is incredibly important and whether you have the digital checklist like me or you just have a very thorough conversation um before i i think it's incredibly important to to ask for those things and maybe maybe once you have that trust you can they can start asking for more like i i definitely agree that that especially in sexy moments like being asked like hey can i can i use up your decay can i sit on your face hey can i like hey it's really hot because yes absolutely but also be it's checking in to be like hey if you said no to this great i can keep i can go back to doing some other stuff where we can figure something else out um and i think i i think it's important to figure out where your boundaries are and when you're new and you're excited um it can be really hard to kind of nail down where those are and um i i think it's important that if you are listening to this and you are new or you haven't played yet to like make sure that your approach is one that that is coming from a place of curiosity because we love curiosity around here but it's also coming from a place of of security and safety um so that you can be a lifelong thingser i think that longevity is did i just squeak? oh i started from a young age i just hit puberty in the end of 56 kill me um i think i do have one final thing that i thought of and i think you kind of started getting towards that with from the bottom's point of view from the new person's point of view.
If you come into this lifestyle with an ego, you're going to have problems, you're gonna lose because there's so much that you just have an experience. And even if you come in with experience, if you approach your submission or your dominance with an ego, you're not trying to have a connection. You're trying to prove something to yourself, you're trying to uphold an image, you're doing something that most of us that play regular in this lifestyle aren't interested in. I'm not interested in being here to stroke your fucking ego so you can take pictures of your bruises and then put them all on your fat life because you think that's what makes you like tougher or better.
It's that intention that it's just come in to learn. You don't have to impress me. You don't have to impress me with how crazy or the wild shit that you do. I want to have a connection with you.
I want to play with you. I want to dominate you. I want to create something with you. Whether it's one time play or you become a regular play partner, I'm not interested in egos, not mine and not yours.
Yeah. Good job. Yeah. For sure.
He goes going to get your hurt. Rope. Oh, no. Momo.
Have you been online? Do you do a lot of a... I don't know if I still have it, but YouTube used to have a lot of instructional videos on harnesses and things like that. I know Two Naughty Boys was really good.
Yeah. I know that Dio has been practically living on YouTube. I need to look up Two Naughty Boys because she's been looking for ties that are specifically more masculine. So, yeah.
Do you want to... Are we recording this part? Yeah. Okay.
Just checking. Okay. Flip Two Naughty Boys. Two Naughty Boys.
I know they had a YouTube channel and they had like a million videos and then they got banned off YouTube because they had a bondage thing and so they just made it and then other people put up their things. But Two Naughty Boys was the classic like in the early 2000s, the up until like the teens, they had a billion instructional videos. There really are a lot of places to learn rope online and you just got to kind of get out there and learn. Obviously, you're going to learn best if you go to like a Devil Mass Society and have people actually work with you physically.
But if you aren't near a dungeon or you know people that can teach you, then you do the next best thing and you educate yourself and watch as many videos and then practice those things on pillows and things like that and then work your way up to not killing your partner. Yeah. That's very important. And D's been very good about like checking in about like limbs falling asleep and cramps and stuff like that.
So, she's very much on top of not killing me, which I appreciate. Also, we probably should say if we're going to talk about rope, you really should invest a certain amount of time in anatomy and physiology and understanding where nerves are, where the nerves that can cause a lot of damage are. And there's obviously the more you go to the real rope people, you're going to learn about a lot of these things. But rope is something that you can really mess yourself up with.
And it's just a simple tie, a simple tie for 10 minutes too long and you can cause nerve damage that can last for months or even be permanent. So always learn how the body works because everyone's body works different. There's a little more you know fucking rope. Good topic.
Good topics. Good times. Enigma will catch you on the next one. Sounds good.
Don't die. No, we're not talking. You can't die on me. Yeah, I was going to edit the show.
Exactly. I'll be left in limbo here. And with that, the end of show 403, thank you for joining us. If you have any questions, comments or you'd like to just send Boogie a cough loss and so you can figure out what that was going on, please send it to pervertedpodcast at gmail.com where you can find us on TikTok or Instagram under the name of a perverted podcast.
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Thank you, path girl, a fantastic show. And I'm cheered up and I'm glad I am glad this show is a life source for us. It really get out there people get out there and have a thing whether it's a volunteer thing you go pick up trash you help old people fucking you know make bombs or whatever the fuck you do with old people. I don't know here.
What's the fucking fuse grandma we're gonna go blow up some fucking dirt mounds. Do you think people make jam with their grandmas? I don't know maybe you don't scream eating that well. I can't really have sugar anymore.
So it's got to be bombs now. The sugar free jelly boogie. Ew. Ew.
Yeah, but it's got chemicals and shit that mess me up. What doesn't have chemicals? Gah. Food actual food.
Don't even get me started. Don't even get me started. We're just we're just gonna end this show help old people make bombs find something that can get you out of your head and usually when you go to do something for other people like we get on the show and we do this for you that helps us get out of our shitty lives. It's our therapy too and I thank you so much the five of you that are still listening to us.
There's more than five. I know there's more than five. There should be five million but you know closer somewhere somewhere not in the middle of that is where we are. And don't be afraid to fall in love.
Oh god. I literally just wrote a song called Wildly Impulsive which is about a girl that falls in love real easy and there's no real good word for it. I struggled for three hours just going back. No, no.
I'm saying there's no word like for people that start falling in love easy. The word is called like emophilia. Yeah, put that in a fucking song and have it sound cool. And emophilia.
I like fucking tacos like there's no there's no cool word for somebody that like hard on your sleeve whatever I struggled with it. So I just called it Wildly Impulsive which was kind of close because that's kind of what falling in love is you're wildly impulsive you have to have it like a monkey that can't take its hand out of the jar candy whatever these are the things that I do that make me crazy but I did finish the 24th song for those of you I always cut out this shit but I have a goal every year to write a minimum of 24 songs and I always do more because I finished early last year I hit 24 songs September 20th and yesterday which was May 20th I fucking finished my 24th song and this is the song that I finished so please know that not all the songs are this stupid but it's fun because it deals with your ho years and the song is called ho years and it is my gift to you we'll see you next time on show 404