Bathgirl. Yes, Count Bo-duh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh. My name is Count for a very specific reason. Oh, why is that, sir?
I've done weird like evil spell witchcraft math for nine years to line up this show correctly. O-kay. It's a Halloween show. Yes it is.
It is the Halloween show we are doing. And the number of the show is 4-13. Oh, what? Nine years it took me to start in my side.
So now I have to let everyone know. You touch your genitals four times. I say Count Boogie, Count Boogie. I mean if you want for dramatic effects you can do that.
Yes. But if you touch your genitals four times right now, pretty much you'll be masturbating I guess. That's- that's- Insert joke here, wha wha wha wha. Pretty much that's the only one I could just make off the fly but it is 13.
And it is the Halloween show so I thought that was pretty cool. And we have a- oh the hell of a show do we have so let's get the vloggy vlog to it. Do you feel you sexy life is quite lame? I'm Or more our who should be more woo Like I'm trying to get the fucking Halloween spirit.
Okay. I am I went to a Halloween party I played hello and welcome to the perverted podcast show where we spookily talk about kinks and perversions and bad jinas and paninas I'm count boogie recording on zencaster where I'm no vampire, but I sure do know how to suck And wait wait wait wait We have breaking news perverted podcast news I thought you were doing nard war for a second what nard war the guy that weird guy that that interviews all the rappers and people And he's really really thorough that you've never heard of nard war is a genius He's like total like borderline something right? He's like my headline news, dude He's well hang on nard war is pretty cool. He interviews all the rappers, but he's really never mind.
Yes What is the breaking news? You actually touched a mess. It happens It happens the heavens have opened up and the cosmos has aligned where boogie has actually got not his own ass But someone else's ass a female ass. Oh, yes.
Yes. I did I did I went to an actual Halloween party And I actually dressed up. I I was a third world country missionary Which was Well because which is which is code for I don't have much of a costume I have to throw something together and put some creative bullshit, but the creative bullshit I put behind it did win me the funniest costume because I had to make Bible paddles because for some reason I didn't and I was requested to bring them by the party host who I used to play with and So she said hey, it is gonna be kind of a play party So, you know if you're interested in bringing some of those book paddles hint hint I said, okay, well, let's do that so then I thought well I'll maybe I'll order one of those clergy shirts, you know the black one with the white collar thing Yeah, and so I do that online and I get one cheap cheap being the the main word there And then like it arrives, but I realized I don't have any Bible paddles I only book a Mormon paddle so I don't make toys And so I had to order some you can get Bibles really really cheap online Yeah And so I got two of those and I had the stuff and so I made one for her for her birthday because it was her birthday And then I was gonna have that go with the shirt But I was too cheap to buy black pants and I'm like what the hell am I gonna do? so I just put on my khaki shorts and my Doc Martin black boots and And then I put on my big gardeners hat that I used to go out Pokemoning with you know and then I'm like well I'm a missionary.
That's what literally would you go to if I was a Christian preacher So that's what the missionaries look like when you go to Mexico or South America or Africa or whatever They all wear like the Methodist ones they wear the black clergy shirt to show that they're official But then they just literally wear shorts and bush stuff, you know because they're in the freakin elements So I'm like this is perfect and they all bought it. They all went for it I walked in the door and I said hi, Mike and walked in the door and said I was a third-world country missionary And I brought angel hair pasta because they wanted spooky food to be brought to the potluck and I'm like that doesn't glorify the Lord so I brought angel food cake and angel hair pasta and Dry dry pasta, you know in case anyone wanted to chew on it and So I went to the party and then you know the horn started because I'm like well It's a play party So you know I did my little peruse around the room and most of the people were coupled except for maybe one and And we did birthday spankings where I did like a whole sermon preachy thing with the Bible paddle and make her quote You know sins of the Ten Command Man's or books in the New Testament, which of course she failed at all of them Oh gosh And so that was kind of fun in front of everyone and then immediately after there was the one and I talked to this lady before and she was Real cool and I said so you you because you know what game does not leave count boogie It just goes hibernating of course, but when it's time to click that shit on I want you all motherfuckers to know I turn it the fuck back on I literally turned to her in the chair and said hi. She said hi I said are you a top or bottom? And she's like I'm a switch, but I'm mostly a bottom and I go great.
So we're playing tonight, right? And she litters like yeah, yeah, let's do it and so which I was like she could have rejected me I mean, but how can you reject this? I mean this? God this dormant monster of primal aggression and Worship of the altar of the boogie.
That's exactly sort of what it was. Maybe she was more desperate than me. I don't know Too many too many but we had a great scene It was really fun and and we went into the couch and there was a couple different couches And it was all that the decorations were amazing and the host and her boyfriend Which I finally found out he's like a big science guy like an astronomy guy like so all this to all my new to grass Tyson fetishes and you know Everything about planets and binaries and that like this guy does it for real. So so I talked to him for about a couple hours But back to the placing because that's what everyone cares about.
It was really nice. She's really into vlogging She was very into thuddy. I did the thing I did dust off my negotiation shops But she was in the life she's been in the lifestyle literally like double the time I have been oh wow so there You know she filled in all the gaps of things that I did So she definitely knows how to speak up for herself and this is what I like what I don't like so it was real nice And there's you know scratching and gripping and flogging and spanking and I really and what was really cool And I'll let you get to you because I think you got some dick too Which is probably more important than my play but for the blow-by-blow What was the most interesting is even though you go dormant and you know I hadn't played in a lot since that last spanking party a few months ago But I hadn't flogged you know the spanking part is a little flogging But this is where I really got to use vloggers and use two of them and have her in a good position over the couch And she also really really loved vlogging and they were my big Fuddy floggers and about like five minutes into of course I had to be like way more attentive because you know I'm a little out of practice with the two hands and whatever so it was less you know free and more me going Okay, where's my flogger pointing and the shoulders and the right spots, but other than that after even after a few minutes I just noticed that kink-com Yes, you know what I'm talking about that moment where you're like this is what I do This is how I turn off the voices I have all this focus on this body and where to hit and how to orchestrate and bring out the sounds and bring out the experiences I did a lot of like deep-tish because she's really she's a sensation whore so it's I'm like great I was a massage therapist So I know all the places to push and so it was a lot of digging and deep tissue and all the things like that mixed with it But in that flogging moment, it just everything just kind of went peaceful And which is so so rare Oh, yes, so rare for me my dreams aren't even fucking peaceful and it was just so nice to just go Oh, yeah, I'm kinky and this is my happy space. Yes.
Yes, so it was so it was real nice She had a great time we've talked a bunch of times and text and stuff and And she had a really great time It was it was the right scene for her at the right time and and and so it was cool It was cool to be there and take some of the reward for some of the hard work I didn't feel insecure about myself very much and and so it was real good. I had a really nice time So what about your vagina? Well, my vagina let's see I had a good dick down And I think I had mentioned it to our patrons on I have Phoebe show which if you're not a sugar zombie you missed it You need to sign up. That was a good show by the way.
Oh my god. Yes For the the main audience we actually use chat GPT to generate some really interesting weird questions about BDS Oh, yeah, they're a came out real a lot better than me So I'm so happy to be cheap fuck that I can't even say it They were generic questions that were obviously built on the algorithms of all the people that ask questions about BDSM So so but I just still would still prefer prefer to podcast at gmail.com for the humans to ask their questions Yes, so we can actually interact like the post that we have that we're gonna talk about in a second So sorry go ahead go back to dick. Okay, so yeah, so yeah, Donas and I actually last Saturday went to a Halloween party I actually just sent you the picture and you're gonna be laughing as darkly if you go look at it I said describe this but that I hadn't been with Donas in a while because last time we got together was just way too busy And I was so tired so I nearly came over and he came over. I'm like hi.
Fuck me. Please. Please. Please.
Please. Please So yeah, dragging your ass across the floor like a I had to work that morning for a little while and it's just like the whole time of the lab is so quiet and I'm just sitting there Working on my car Oh, man, you were so lady and me and Unfortunately, he edged himself too much to the point where he was not able to finish which but you know no complaints here 15 to 22 Is you know, but there's times that he goes quick and I'm like, hey, it's a number game. We're good. We're good.
We're good But yeah, it's important to you know, you do your best, you know, sometimes you blow early, you know And that's fine, but you know, I like the ratio the ratios a good ratio. Yes Did you pick up your phone and look at the picture? I sent you I have not I don't want it to I don't want it to fuck Oh, it just popped up. What the fuck am I looking at is?
Wait, he's Velma. Uh-huh and I'm and you're fucking Fred It's pretty classic. Hey Halloween and he's like you said that the Velma outfit. I'm like, oh no Do you actually rocks it.
Oh my you know the funny thing is Velma with a beard I'm with a full beard and chest hair poking out of the Disgusting that's so awesome. But the funny thing is he's even though he was wearing underwear like he went to go sit on my couches that Leather he's like, oh, I'm not used to having cold leather in the back of my thighs. I'm like, uh-huh Welcome to dress wearing the being a girl look at that. Look at that.
Oh, that's fucking funny Yeah, can we post it cuz his face isn't it can we post that on fat life? I Could I'm not supposed to know that life. Yeah. Yeah, yeah put on her fat life Sorry, I can go to our fat life page and you know probably by now the show should be posted and yeah I'll go and see it's classic great costuming a little bit slightly better than my bullshitting third world missionary costume Yes, I need to see pictures of your third world.
I don't have a well I guess I could repoot it on and take a picture of that. Yeah, so I'm so happy you play I'm so glad you get to have one glad that you cuz I know you were like all worked up in the trip to New York and And that's you know sometimes just 20 orgasms Yeah, we'll do it and I just signed the paperwork yesterday or actually last night to start financing looking for our Donna son I are officially now looking for a house. Oh, wow. Yeah.
Yeah financing and like sending W2s and pasty It's all official. Oh, man. The loans are working. We're looking so fantastic I mean terrifying for me absolutely a colostor phobic psychotic mind fuck for me But I am happy for you because I know you're good at this and he seems real down with this and so cohabitation with a mortgage Oh, yeah That I look at me building you up as a Jew screaming.
What are you doing? Oh my god, but no, that's that's actually pretty cool I'm pretty stoked. Well, let's get on because we have a short topic, but it's a good topic. So let's get to that Okay, thank you to Reddit this is an amazing question path girl Yes, I really like this question and here's wild because you know You know we're gonna talk about the topic, but here's what I like about a question like this because the ultimate answer is When you communicate with your partner and you find out that they are not like you in a certain way and that like especially with a desire For a kink or a philosophy or whatever I believe that that is your opportunity to actually learn grow as a person yourself and build more intimacy with your partner So you can win win and that's what makes the negotiation and communication which obviously we're gonna talk about That's what makes it sweeter when you find these these things that make you kind of go Oh, I really hadn't thought of this like this and so The post was you know paraphrase kind of post-coital humiliation is this enjoyable?
Fantastic question. I love this poster. So the question I think because as someone with a vagina and capable of multiple orgasms Look you have a sister you and her which by the way to most of our female listeners all understand multiple orgasms are a rarity And not the norm, but in this case you and her both have them I've known you guys to be multiple too. So there you go.
Now that is even more rare, but Let us let us continue with kale. Jesus Christ. Did I make a lettuce joke fucking kill me? Someone with a giant is cable I'm just gonna ignore it multiple orgasms it can be difficult for me to wrap my head around the experience of being one and done My husband and I have been exploring humiliation more and he has this big fantasy of like getting so worked up sexually that when he goes to start vaginal pen penetration He just blows his load right away.
Yeah, so that she can then make fun of him for it Like he's you came too quick. What do you fucking 12? I can just picture the level of humiliation that can go into that and this is his fantasy So her question is where I will absolutely enjoy doing this good She's a trooper humiliation trooper go her and get turned on by it But in her head once the edges lost for a guy and they're cooling down Do I get self-conscious about him like not enjoying it post-quailily and will usually she would stop a session at that point because from her point of view That would be bad like right like for her the humiliation is something you do before to get turned on and then you nut But in this fantasy, he's like no I want to nut and do that and she's like I guess is that a thing for some people or is this something better left for fantasy? And not just great in practice and then she you know goes on to some other things So I'm like oh my god I was just chomping and I did respond to her even though it was a reddit because this is absolutely a thing and that opportunity to Understand the headspace of somebody into humiliation that's different than yours because I'm not like this guy No, so you go ahead and go and tackle it first and then I'll throw some shit I mean as far as it is a thing for some people sure I mean there is such a wide spectrum of kink what you every day there's something I learned as I never knew that was a kinkable There you go traditionally people who do humiliation whether it be in the top-to-bottom female male it ranges all spectrums from Something like this where it's like oh look at you you're a 12-year boy You already noted to you know cheesing somebody to the point where they want to nut and they can't or you know cuck holding There's all different variations of humiliation play so I mean If it's just I think maybe she's trying to take her preconceived notion of what humiliation play is and not understanding that It could be twisted around a bit I mean for him it probably be like kind of sitting there in like the wetness of his cum going oh man I fucked that over and just you know I Humiliation is not my kink but the people I know who love it just basically to them.
It's just it's almost affirming it away We're kind of like oh, you know where it's it's just like oh wow look at you. You're you're an idiot You can't believe you blew your load like that You know it's it's it's it's really strange that So I don't know how experienced they are in kink where it's just you know Maybe they haven't played what other kinds of melee plation the melee I should play if they done You know they've done anything with her but I'm cuteness for her like you said for being a trooper about least trying it Because there are plenty of people we're just basically like no I'm not into that screw you and it's just like you know What do you think I? I was chomping I was chomping at the bit because I do Have some really I do quite a bit for myself and then of course I have my partners now I don't have male partners because this is very this has definitely a different dynamic when you Talking about the emasculation of humiliation and taking a manly man and humility in that way These are different from female humiliation. There is a difference shut the fuck up.
There's a fucking difference Yes, so there are a lot of things that are similar and the same types of things But there are some things that are a little different but that being said humiliation is not just about the sex That's what's important to understand. It's about the high of being down It's the high of being down or losing very much like gamblers gamblers now They're all different dynamics too But people with an addiction to gambling are not necessarily addicted to the high of winning They're addicted to the high of losing their money because it's that sick humiliation look at what I've done You know whatever that fantasy that experience that what's going on in the brain is different than you are either not necessarily into humiliation Those hormones and chemicals that are being released are High it is a feeling it's the same thing with cocaine and don't get me into cocaine I have done cocaine is I hear you start going too much on cocaine. It is a humiliating Sick experience that I personally hate but some people love they love that dark ugly feeling That is a type of high for them that their brain is releasing things that to them are a kind of weird pleasure Like they get off on it. Maybe it's the after I don't know I talked to a few different people and I talked to gamblers I've talked to cocatics.
I've had my own cocaine snorted mountains of that shit I've done a lot of that but with humiliation in this fantasy, it's the understanding that it's not necessarily about the sex So technically after he nuts, he's gonna be lower So that humiliation is actually gonna be hotter to him as Opposed to thinking like you and me we're like humiliation Okay, get horny and then after that tension builds then we have our cum release and it's joy and fucking sparkles and cuddles and go get your cookie But to the person that has or you know that darker humiliation The lower you can get them and of course when you nut and you release all those chemicals especially for guys when you release all that And you get rid of all that testosterone that kick in the crotch that humiliation and that that goes darker Does that make sense? Yeah, because it's just if you think about it when he nuts It's actually starting the scene if you will. Yeah, absolutely like getting lower and lower and it's just You know Like I said, it's not my king So like humiliation to me is kind of almost like a trigger for me But if you start it where the scene actually starts when he nuts, right? And you're basically you know, I don't think he'd be asking for it if he didn't think he'd enjoy it I mean you've granted there are people that oh, yeah, I want this king in the chart and they're like nope Nope, one of them sure humiliations very that's common for humiliation.
That's yeah, yeah And some things do work better in fantasy than reality. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, but yeah if he's into it go ahead I'm sorry No, I was about to say it's if you want to go ahead and try and just you know as we have always said before Extensive be for debriefing and basically, you know, even humiliation and maybe things that are off limits like, you know Don't talk about my penis size or you know Let me go clean up first or something or you know, don't tell me that you know that I disappoint my family or go to you know Other head spacing and that's and that's that's part of look when you start going into this This is dark edge play because you're mind fucking this is humiliation is an edge play I mean everything can be an edge play but humiliation really has maybe not physically but psychologically Once you start getting into it, you have to be extra careful because you get man Relationships can end and shit can happen and yeah People can get to into it and start going to the taboo places and and now you're in therapy Because you opened up a can of worms that even you didn't know maybe because there is that risk That this could be a negative request and we can't ignore that that this may be coming from somewhere that I deserve this and Actually on our on our other show have a peepee bakura had actually Come in about a place in that he was doing where he talked about Feeling like he deserved it and and actually probably be good to talk to him about that at some point Oh, yeah, hey bakura get back on the fucking show asshole and go in your closet I remember that's right he had to be in the closet because it was the only place quiet enough with his hardwood floors get back on Bakura so he was talking about that you know I felt like I deserved it and then it went negative because it wasn't the right mindset It wasn't a sexy weird degrading thing like when bunny like humiliation bunny is an incredibly powerful confident person So for her the humiliation could easily stay in role play and it was just hot and embarrassing and that got her turned on But for some people yeah, it could be from a negative, but yeah, just like you said go a little bit lighter say okay We're gonna try a couple things. Let's try this get turned on go ahead bust and I'll say some things But just like you know I talked about having a special safe word not just read But a special safe word for bunny when we cook weender that let me know that she didn't want to end the scene But the humiliation was making her uncomfortable in a not good way that she could say join and then we bring her right onto the bed And then give her attention So maybe have some of those things in place where you start slow and then just say see how it goes And then see if it really does turn them on and if that's the case then man You're off on onto a whole new thing and if she says she can get off on it and he man you just discovered a whole Fun world to your relationship and that's why I just love this Well, yeah, especially that she's saying that she enjoys everything leading up to it and then he's enjoying everything afterward It sounds like it's a perfect match. Yeah, and she even said I could totally get into this even the after parts You know she said she could get into it.
So so yeah, this sounds good once again humiliation is is an edge play treat it like such Do your training do your homework spend time talking and then go in light? Don't go in crazy. Especially this is your husband and you guys obviously have a connection and Hopefully and you communicate well it appears from this post that they do spend time talking about this She's I think she's doing everything exactly right. She saw opinions and the thing about the gambling addiction thing that I had told her She's like wow, I didn't think about that and that makes and that makes it very different.
Yeah, it's a it's a whole high the high of being low So a fantastic topic. I love it. Love it pervertedpodcastsgmail.com if you have questions or comments about this or you have your own situations that you've had where you went through Humiliation and either went good or it went bad and why I want to hear about that pervertedpodcastsgmail.com Enigma the dentures have been put away the the adult diapers have driven off I'm just being mean at this point. Okay.
I am so glad for the listeners that are listening happy happy Halloween by the way Enigma can't wait to hear about all your shenanigans But something that was scary right here was I'm we're just about to start our recording I'm in storage and literally up until like 40 seconds ago right outside of my unit. There was this the cutest little talkative old couple Working on their storage unit and you and I have to start a show So by nature of perverted podcasts, let's just say some of the topics that are coming up Might because I can hear every word they're saying they're like oh, I love this bag. Oh, this boss is so heavy Oh, let me get me on with that Like a 300 years old and I'm old and they sound old and I'm like I can't be talking about They're gonna shatter. I mean, maybe not maybe not maybe they would have knocked down the door and been like, you know Herbert's got a giant penis that he gives me anal with too, but they just sounded a little more innocent than our show and They're now good.
He could have had three testicles and could have contributed to this conversation to the foreshadowing of the mayor Ham that is coming up But you are like literally in the middle of Halloween season as a scare person at an amusement park Mm-hmm. So any any good news on the scare front? At this point, I'm glad that it's almost over. Oh, Jesus.
It's just it's as much fun as it is. It is a lot of work I'm basically on my feet for Six to eight hours every day for like four days in a row at this point So it's growling and running after people and being intense for most of that six hours. I'm like, right? I'm not saying it's not fun because it's absolutely fun, but it's definitely draining on the old on the old soul for a little bit So I am tired, but also I still love scary people.
I love chasing after people. It's still a lot of fun And getting that look that says oh, you're a monster fucker is is fantastic You're a monster fuck out aren't you? You know, you just want to say it. You just want to make the thing you want to fuck Frankenstein, don't you?
What's your character this year? Did we talk about what they have you in this year? It's more or less the same that I've been the last couple years. I am a basically underwater pirate in the Bermuda Triangle who got stuck in the Bermuda Triangle I have a very like shabby costume and in my face this year I have kind of a ghoulish ghoulish gopplingy kind of nose and chin like other like prolonged nose and chin Um that are that are fun to scare people with so but it's still more or less like I've been an undersea pirate for the like the last couple years So right um your taste for seaweed has uh has not grown at all.
No, but my taste for booty has Oh You need some asses what you're saying ass. I can say ass eating ass you're sticking your tongue right up these ass lately I mean we've talked about it. We've both been really busy this month So we haven't done I have not gone down on the peach in a bit, but um it is not off the menu Um just hasn't been uh we've both been pretty tired this month Hmm. Well, you know I had my shenanigans so fortunately the listeners got at least some but uh, I understand You're working.
I just like that you guys talk about you know you haven't eaten my ass in a long time Yeah, yeah, let's uh let's uh hit our google calendar and schedule in some ass Yeah, like uh I think She's done it at some point. She was like, you know, I haven't pegged you in a while and like you haven't this is true Um and then and then we'll figure out when to do that. So yeah, it's it's a fun it's fun back and forth I love it. I absolutely love it.
We have some fun topics today. Let's start with the uh the one-on-one struggle and then uh we'll go to our Big double finish uh after that sounds good So this is not an article like we're used to but it's actually a advice column from slate.com Um and it is entitled I proposed a different kind of sex to my husband and well that didn't go as planned So a married couple of eight years when it despised things up in their marriage in a new way Um, they weren't new to experimenting but in this case wrestling was the desired experiment But the guy was just kind of pinned her down and wouldn't let her up until she tapped up Um, the advice columnist goes on to suggest that the couple communicate better to figure out what the goals are for the wrestling Um, they can take wrestling classes short, but really they both need to know what the goals of the scene are Do you want to draw out the wrestling or do you want to be stopped and taken quickly? What is it about the wrestling that's excited? But before they do that do it again, maybe go over what a fantasy situation like this would look like I love it.
I have some good advice. That was a solid solid advice to talk through it and find out what your goals are That's all the same stuff that that we talk about Um, obviously wrestling, you know We could spend time on wrestling just wrestling and just the back and forth and there's actually a lot to Engaging when it's because a lot of times our topping and bottoming is the bottom goes against across or in a position And then the top does things to them, right? Whereas wrestling is now, you know, you're getting into A lot more that can go wrong obviously Um, a lot more emotionally that can go wrong because now you're in like a physical combat with another person And that really does amplify the dynamics and it touches into primal it touches into intellectual it can touch into triggers Like there's all I mean, it just sounds like fun. Like, oh, we're gonna wrestle a bit But there actually is some things to think about before you're going to do this.
Otherwise You can have some really not good experiences, right? So you go ahead and take your whack first and then uh, and then I'll dig in Yeah, well, I this is something I really I have enjoyed doing I like a little bit of struggle a little bit of wrestling And I've definitely played with people who could definitely pin me back down But that wasn't the goal of the scene was for me to take them And so they will struggle and they will push back and as the dominant like I Like I you know, I don't want to say like I do work out Um, but like I do have like I am a bigger guy I do have like I have good arm strength So like I can easily pin somebody down pretty quickly and then they can't get up And then the scene is over but I don't want the scene to be over And so I think these two this couple needs to have that conversation about like How how much struggle does she want? How much struggle does he want? Because it sounds like you just kind of like put her down and kept her down and like that can be hot But it's the I think what What the advice columnists even gets into is like the the fun is is the struggle the fun is the fight right?
And if you're the husband that the dominant partner isn't really letting you fight back then it's just not a sponge fun anymore So I think I think that needs to be a conversation and then like also how far do you want to go like how Intense of a wrestling scene every doing here Because like I've done the ones where breath play was involved. I've done ones where it was just hey We're we're wrestling around a little bit, but it's gonna end up in sex Um, so like what what is the ultimate goal how intense are you and these are all things that you need to talk about? I think that's a once again We're right on right online with how to make this fun When you have a physical difference between two people which obviously if you're male and female and the male is a lot larger Then obviously genetically, you know, we have the upper body strength We have certain things Once you you know and we'll talk about training and and women that are trained and the dangers of that But if you have a situation where one person is a lot bigger than there and sometimes you have a small guy and and a huge woman Who can literally has the strength to overpower the guy so whoever is the one that has the big strength the noticeable difference in strength It's kind of like you go into like a training coach would like if you have a wrestling coach They're not gonna just pin you and hold you down They're gonna pin you in a certain way to take advantage and then they're gonna back off and let you reassess and try something else Or to continue to to try until you start to make bigger grounds and then they will adjust and keep it going So it's not just like pin done It's like sort of pin and then kind of back off a little bit so they can squirm out of it So there's I mean because it's a fucking roleplay. Yeah, it is a roleplay and that's the one thing to remember Um if it's going to be an actual battle where you are actually going to be relatively equal and all things are a go Which can of course go super super bad because let me tell you something once Somebody who is weaker feels competitive and they start to get that primal trigger going on Yeah, they they get nasty They cheat they do things that are not you're like, hey, this is just like grab and wiggle No, no, no, they're gonna grab a nutsack.
They're gonna grab your fucking nipple They're gonna poke your you know Primal is an entire part of nature that is millions of years old and took millions of years to get All of these creatures to survive. So when you're in that combat that is you're tapping into that unless it's very well negotiated that it's playful And it's gonna be kind of ha ha that's one thing But when people start to feel That primal urge to defend themselves or to win or to be competitive or take territory All of a sudden things start to change inside the head it becomes less playful Which is part of what the hotness is for a lot of people Is that that this is getting kind of real and that being said if you're not ready for real which I am not I'm not a fucking switch. Yeah, so I don't want someone stabbing me on the fucking eye and punching my nutsack and scratching and biting and drawing blood and stuff like that That's not my king. Mm-hmm.
So I need to make sure that whoever wants to wrestle with me wants to wrestle as a bottom and I will do all the things and let them struggle and push them off and and do that type of stuff But if it starts getting to where I see that flare in their eye and they fucking try to scratch my face I'm like you need to stop now. Yeah, that will be then you will be pinned and it will You know wrestling over Because you have to know what you are if you're not a if you're a switch then of course It's it, you know, you're both you're fine. The scratching the biting. It's back and forth.
She bites you you bite her That's totally hot But if that's not what you want like enigma said and like the the advice giver said in the post You need to figure out what your goals are Because if not you're gonna get a really big surprise when she punches you right in your fucking rib To get you the fuck off her because that's that's what that's what wrestling You know, is this for play play is this for real real? So I mean it's a it's a really I mean It's a lot of fun It's just a lot of fun but there are a lot of things that you have to kind of consider and Yeah, talking about before you go in It could lead to bad things if you don't yeah, I mean I I've played with brats who I played with brat Not too long ago who we had a really good negotiation beforehand because they can be really mean as a brat Yeah, but they they know that not everybody is at that same level of of brat tamer And so like we had a negotiation was like I enjoy some bratting I just I don't enjoy cruel bratting and she can she can go that far and so it was kind of like a We had that negotiation of like where where are my limits with bratting? Where are their limits with bratting that sort of thing so And that and that was just a basic actually that involves whips So we had a lot of conversation about like what what certain pain and like Like some of that bratting might just be pain induced And so it's something that I might have to steal it So like it was that was just a conversation that we had had a time before we got into the scene And I think if you're gonna get into the rest, you should have a similar conversation I agree and I wanted to point out if I didn't if I didn't mention this the The top has a lot of responsibilities too. And what I say by job the person that is the strongest or the person that is the top Um because if you have anger issues like I do Like rage issues.
Oh, yeah, then You have to be really in control of yourself before and that's why I don't do most of these types of wrestling scenes I do playful wrestling. I negotiate playful wrestling I'll play the coach if I take an elbow or something like that I can laugh it off But um, I have anger issues And the last thing I want to do because when you're on the top and you're taking someone it's a roleplay for you too You're going into that primal space too You're taking something and this can go into you know consensual non-consent rateplay All of those types of things you have to have your head in check the entire time Because if you have like a twitch or as something and you go mean and nasty You can now you you have a legal issue now you have now it's now it's not fun So I just I just wanted to point out that if you have anger issues You need to be 10 times more careful of how you have seen like this. Absolutely Good topic though. Very good.
And so now we're gonna get into a much different topic Um this is the one that this is the one I was really because like wrestling A little you know a little nicer, but uh more pg 13 Yeah, cuz literally I can hear every word they were saying outside the door Every fucking word and they weren't talking that loud and I'm like there's no way Yeah, because they're and they're just gonna hear me saying it right here. They may know I'm in here playing guitar I I try to make some noise so they know because the doors close right now, but all of a sudden they're gonna hear this They're gonna hear um a article about three penises research from spiffy From spiffy our lovely listener spiffy And sent this off and uh and it started an entire thing between you and I and uh So thank you listeners biffy. Yes, thank you starting us on multiple penises Cats But yes, this article is uh in title three penises research finds man who lived life unaware of his rare condition Um also if you'd like to read this article and any other article you can find it on our felt like page So just just before yeah, yep. Yep unaware of his condition.
Mm-hmm. I'm assuming Maybe not not not from uh a more modern. This might be someone far away where there's not a lot of access to porn and uh Stuff like that maybe possibly possibly so this condition is doesn't know that it's different That's a special life. Mm-hmm.
Okay, continue. Sorry. It's okay So a condition known as tri-falia was recently discovered by researchers at the university of Birmingham It was discovered in the body of a 78 year old man who had donated his body to science Uh the man likely never knew of this condition as there were no signs of it on the outside of his body The case shows that there are probably a lot of birth effects that go unnoticed unless something goes wrong It also shows that this or diphalia, uh, which is just two could be more common than we think if the x-rogans are hidden Um the two additional peens were found under the skin next to the main organ. Oh, I'm like a man Yeah, I'm like a man.
That's how you would know. Oh, okay. Never mind. Yeah, okay.
Go ahead. I forgot No, you're good. I'm like a man in 2020 where a child's trifalia was visible at birth and treated Something that the uh the man actually never knew about at all. Okay, let's stop right there Okay, we're just started there because the term that was used was surgically corrected That kid was born with three dicks and they put the words but it was surgically corrected And then just moved on as if that is if that was just something to gloss over you're cutting off fucking dicks, bro Yeah, you're cutting off dicks.
You're cutting off kids dick. Now. I don't care if you got 11 of them It's still someone's dick you're chopping off. Mm-hmm.
Don't don't talk like oh just surgically I was surgically corrected shut the fuck up you're cutting off dicks You should at least make that into like a like a necklace or something Maybe like a taxidermy finger puppet Something like that, but something a little bit show a little more respect He had three dicks. We made the decision with the family as hard as it was to cut some of them off surgically corrected Sorry, sorry fine. This topic was very hard on me That's fair. Um and then the internal organs even show that they were mostly full of fully developed Um, but because nothing went wrong.
No one went looking so now Um, this actually made me think um and I will I will also post the link to this AMA But a guy on reddit did an AMA who had two penises Um, and they were two fully functional penises on the outside of his body Um And it's it's pretty impressive like he both of them work. He can fuck with both. He can be with both Um, so for him, it was it was definitely something that um he found like he was able to live with Um, but at the same time that guy, but yeah, yeah, we have stuff to talk about that guy. Yeah, yeah We have to be talking about that guy, but um, but yeah, so this is something that is definitely Uh more common than maybe we think um, but definitely we're talking about So first let's go to captain two dicks here.
Okay. Okay, so of course Hey, there's a link to a picture. There's a number of links to pictures and and and as much as i'm like I know what penises look like I do I I see the cock shots avatars that I I don't want to see But i'm like I kind of have to see it and just there it was two dicks And uh, and then I read some of his stuff. He was the reddit to dick guy He made a book about having two dicks like my life with two penises and it had a pair of jeans with the bulge on both sides Very classy very clever.
Yeah, yeah, and uh, and he was very enthusiastic about it But the thing that that kind of pissed me off was first off good job because he's bisexual So he's like I now he has to have two relationships, which I thought was funny because he's with both a man and a woman So you can have everything because bisexual you have to have it all um literally there are no restrictions Uh if you like everybody and everything Yeah, and the idea that he has this dick is for men and this dick is for women I thought that was kind of funny or they switched it up But then it kind of pissed me off because it's like you have two dicks that both work Think with me on the sinigma two dicks that both work To our perverted podcast listener. This is a plural To all of the slats and horrors out there that are perverted. Yeah, how many of you? It's a it's literally one in 5.5 million That you're gonna have two dicks at work.
Right. The odds are astronomical. Right Would that not be a bucket list thing for almost every woman and gay or bisexual man? I gotta talk to the guy with two dicks.
I gotta talk to the guy with two dicks. I gotta see I gotta I gotta I gotta Yeah, and he's in a committed monogamous relationship with these two. He's still with two. It's funny.
He has two penises, but yeah, no, no, but dude It's like you're really failing society Because you got two people and that's it that can experience the thing that you have that is like one in fucking 5.5 million rarity Yeah, and what's even like They're not small either like they're like they're they're they're they're like these inside. He's got two fucking hogs side by side And it's like you just start to think like I'm you know all of a sudden. I'm looking down Feeling very inadequate because I only have one penis average one penis owning fucking person but Just thinking of all the obviously you're thinking double penetration You're thinking getting two women back to back so you could do anal on two of them Like if you lay them on the edge of a bed On their sides and their sides are back to back squeezed together You could because his were side to side it wasn't one on top of the other I saw one on top of the other guy and that's just and the one on top was smaller So I'm like dude your doggy style double penetration all day. Oh, yeah every day every day all day Absolutely, but this guy could like literally they were long enough that he could kind of split him apart And yet he's in a relationship with only two people I was I was furious.
I was furious for all the women and men in the world that that that would be a bucket list If I was if I was into dudes, I'd be like I gotta fuck the the two-dick guy I mean you're saying you wouldn't want to at least get a better look if you had the opportunity like I know you're not the person I think that was enough that was enough Completely and I I I want to when I look at dicks on pictures It's because I'm pretending it's mine and the fact that there was two of them kind of confused my whole porn mentality of yeah That's me fucking that shit. No, that's that's a guy. I don't have two dicks Okay, okay, motherfucker. Go ahead.
I have my rans. You do have a little bit of rant. No, that's fine I I find it's really interesting just from a science perspective It's really interesting to think about all the stuff that just gets unnoticed because nothing goes wrong Um, like we could look at that from a medical perspective That's like some people have cancerous things in their body and they just never knew because it was benign and never really did anything Um, but for this we're like it's a fully two extra fully developed penises It's kind of like I know it's a genetic defect, but it's like oh, I have a backup in case the first doesn't work It's like oh, I just pulled this out of my nose. I never understood why I always come when she rubs my inner thighs Because I have extra dicks buried in my legs dicks in your legs dicks in your legs a lot of dicks in your legs Oh, so we have a new song very good.
The jokes could go for days Women deserve this I mean man does I mean everybody does everyone who anyone who wants to partake of penis because then of course you got I mean You know because those were normal sized penises so that's double the girth Yeah, like you would have to go like because they're side by side That's perfect because women like the stretch Well, the women that like the stretch like the stretch kind of outward as opposed to up top I mean that's really chip Well, maybe he had a day day though. I don't know maybe he had maybe he had the time where he did a few years Oh, I'm sure he's slitted it up for a while Slitted up with his two working fucking the ex-greeting mother fucker But I remember I look through this this a-may before and like he never did porn He actually turned down a lot of really good of porn deals. It was just not something he was interested in doing I think I think other other diphalia people have have done that but But he was just not particularly interested in participating in lifestyle I feel like I would be the same like I don't know if I would go down that route if I had a bonus dick or two Um, I feel like I know that it's a little bit But I don't know that just be late I Got a bonus dick good one. Sorry.
Yeah point. It'd be like the sequel to the touchable penis I have the backup penis Yeah, so yeah, I think this is it's just really cool from a science thing but also as a not 100% straight person I I go down on the dicks you'd you'd want to doubt I mean you could have it It's like your own gang bang. It's your own demonstration And if you're a territorial guy like me that would be perfect because you know a lot of women have the bucket list of a real DP And you're like I can handle it. I got I got you covered honey.
Yeah, you want you got this going on Yeah, we can do DP in both holes. We can do DP in one hole like it's we can do the full porn Yeah, like you could so much Yeah, there is so much you could just handle on your own without that's just half the drama that you have to deal with another fucking individual Because the heads attached to the second penis. So, uh, you know, it's less searching. It's yeah, I think I really cheated people You really really pissed me off I would tell I wouldn't if I mean well if I had if my dick wasn't camera shy I'd be doing porn But okay, okay and the erectile dysfunction, you know that goes with that That would be that would be a downer if like you had these you had the bonus dick and both of them didn't work well And you're just like, oh well.
Yeah, it's just for looks. Yeah, it's just for looks then I take fruit free pictures I mean you didn't make a living just doing free pictures at like section like I'd moved to Germany or something Or just have a just have a really niche only fans. Yeah. Yeah, yeah And be like do things like you know double dick puppetry like you just really I mean the Possitive like you would never have to go hungry if you have two dicks You just don't you could literally just I'm going freak show because I would I mean that would be amazing I'd get little capes for both of them Yeah, super double-dicks the ambiguous legate duo and it's like yeah I'm not gay, but my penises are gay because they rub against each other all the time Hmm.
They're gay. I'm an octopus for each other. Yeah, they're mad two gay penises that just rub against each other Okay I know I'm 12. I know it's okay.
I know but he really should just be servicing bucketless people He should and there's that that's it. That's all I got. What do you got? No, that's it.
I just think it'd be really fun to play with him if I ever had the opportunity Well, I'm sure you can email but he'd be like no, sorry. I'm gonna my nongamus poly relationship Green motherfucker. You should be able to play with it You know, if we get more famous. Mm-hmm.
I'm gonna buy that guy for you You're gonna buy him. Yeah, I'm just gonna I'm just gonna use my oh, I that's right the lottery I had to win the line. Yeah, sorry. Sorry that.
I'm gonna go 10 grand to let a nigma play with you 10 grand. Okay, I actually just probably gotten more. You probably want more. I don't know how much you're worth for double-dicks It'd be cheaper to buy you two guys.
I mean fair fair. It'd be cheaper to buy you two guys But you know for a one-time thing I do love you and uh, you know put it on your Christmas list Maybe book you Santa will buy you a double-dick for Christmas. I don't know. That's fair Probably should end of this segment five minutes ago.
That's also fair. It's Well, then get back to your god. Are you going to scare tonight? Uh, no, we start up tomorrow night start up again.
Oh, Jesus Christ All right. Well, uh, and look forward to hearing all your shenanigans say hi to the woman for me and uh, we will catch you on the next segment Yes, we will. Thank you so much Do you cigarette? I thought you're going to whimper off in the corner like It has been a while since I masturbated.
Oh, and of course there comes through a screeching halt our spooky show for 13 Thank you so much for joining us. I'm not gonna keep that accent If you have any questions comments or if there's any other topics you'd love us to cover to cover Please bring down to us for birdie podcast at gmail.com or find us on tick tock Instagram underneath the birdie podcast and i'm fact like there is both a group and a page You can support us for free for hitting the like us a tripod not whatever after listening to us on it really does help other kinksers like you find us So please share the love and push those buttons and if you'd like to help us to support us a little bit more You can go to our patreon at patreon.com slash birdie podcast and sign up for our five bucks We give a fuck level where you get the shows a few days early our lots of behind the sheets tonight again And of course our half a pp episodes which are always being experimented with chat tpt And of course in 11 smooshy kisses to around the world to all of our sugar zombies and all of our listeners your support means the world to Thank you so much for an enlightening show and just a hint after a nigma and i recorded earlier today You and i both were nigma and i both recorded the same day because it's scheduled But uh just so the listeners know the old people came back literally as we were ending the show So so uh, i'll tell you about it. I'll tell you about it when we finish we didn't scare the old people We finished just in time and they can we try again Okay, oh dear it's so hard to lift this box It's recording his storage lots of fun So uh as our new hollywood tradition hollywood our new halloween tradition goes i will play A halloween song we see you guys on 4 14 and 11 smooshy kisses Wow Stuff to be a girl when the killers are pursuing You've gotta have to block to survive a horror movie You go where you would never go and run and trip all night whether you can make an impossibly clever trap that works You might not die I'm all alone inside of Laura's cabin and my cell phone isn't working I feel an evil presence could be the man who chopped up 20 families twice I turn around to see the door i locked his now white open before i can scream someone grabs me by the throat I grab a nearby object and i knock him to the floor, but i stand there while he gets up and now i'm smelling popcorn Oh, yeah, I should totally run it's tough to be a girl when the killers are pursuing You've gotta have to block to survive a horror movie You go where you would never go and run and trip all night whether you can make an impossibly clever trap that works You might not die No matter where i run and i find that my escape is ineffective He's coming he's coming he moves super slow but has an impeccable sense of direction Play is the Saint-Jid prelic necklace that i'm wearing cursing me every time i trip a tree ranch and tries to flirt with me I met a friend was gotten half rose It's tough to be a girl when the killers are pursuing You've gotta have to block to survive a horror movie You go where you would never go and run and trip all night whether you can make an impossibly clever trap that works You might not die You might have desecrated pages from a secret bull Well i'm not a cabinet on the outer toy God you're annoying I can do a church to hide but now i sense a big climb act again I'm going to wait to bring about a day a record day Find a hand grenade that's been dipped in holy water I trust that my hair looks like crap Stuff to be a girl when the killers are pursuing You've gotta have to block the movie You go where you would never go and run and trip all night But you can watch this I'm pregnant with a demon i name it franken kill a hundred virgins just to feed it Oh, that was weird I'm totally just kidding Or am i