your competition right now for the average guy who's watching this who jacks off five times a week and plays their games for like one hour a day it's more like four the thing is if you do a push-up today you have literally beaten 500 million men how can that not blow your mind if you go and do a good structured program you'll be in pretty much every single guy i think that the dating youtube space at the moment is totally fascinating and it's fragmenting into loads of little subgroups at the moment how would you categorize the content that you make what's the purpose of the stuff that you put out on youtube it's a holistic self-improvement i love that so more than like i've taken a bit from everywhere right i've done the full like hardcore red pill type of stuff i've entered into the black pill so other people don't have to go and look at their content but i found there's never really like a healthy mix between them a lot of them will just focus like just solely on women see them as the enemy trying to be sexist towards them aggressive towards them a lot of them just focus on like nihilism and like this sense of hopelessness i don't think any one pill or space online really combines anything together to give like a younger man the the framework for like a healthy life going forward revolving around the relationships i love the same holistic self-improvement which is okay let's why don't we all just improve as much as we can so of course we'll try to operate smb we'll try to attract more women and everything but why not do that alongside things like healthy mental health practices gratitude mindfulness learning things about childhood trauma and how that shapes our dating life you're right there's no one pill that's got all of the answers within it and you can learn bits by bouncing between them but it seems like the most toxic communities are the ones where someone's got into it and then never ever left oh that was me in the red pill for like seven years you can like i think you've taken it as well you can really really go deep inside one of these and when you stop questioning the reliability accuracy of what like the information that you consume you can so you can find such a hindrance on your growth that's how cults work that is precisely how cults work that you have this leader the leader's work cannot be questioned all of the followers that get co-opted in they all just believe because you're supposed to believe and nobody questions anybody's words and that lack of critical thinking causes i think about what cults do they wrap people around it's a geographical location also an ideological location they don't commit them to grow have you seen my instagram bio no what's it say i've just changed as a cult leader maybe that's what you want about well i did some research on like cults and religions and i wanted to create like the first healthy cult where you actually like voluntarily come in i voluntarily like tell you you're joining the cult where cults are young men who don't fat anymore like it was trying to like reduce our drug usage talk to me about no fat i think the online space has got this different perception of what it is in my opinion i think a lot of people think like it's you know the levitation is going to make you amazing or anything and you certainly will see a very very significant change in your life if you're one of those like hardcore whangers who like you're going multiple times a day messed up porn and if you're just to be honest like there's a fair amount of guys and i have the authenticity so yeah 100 i was not that messed up but i was one of those guys right and so when you go from this like multiple times a day to like maybe let's say once a few days you're masturbating it's quite a big difference and that's like i think as far as a lot of the benefit does go after that there's like this again this cult online just telling you if you have to touch it again that's the perception they're pushing on to young men if you fat again you've lost the benefits which that blows my mind because that's so unhealthy to tell young guys it's like telling a beast guy yeah get into the gym get into the gym you should go every day if you miss a day you lose all of the progress that's that's heartless man that's so like i've come across more young men who have been pained by nofap than who have just like got problems with masturbation yeah because they got this this um existential crisis where now they feel like a more of a loser because they keep failing nofap and it's just like simple habit science i was asking the question like when did you start jacking off and they'll say you know age 13 they're 19 right now so six years you've been building up this habit you found nofap a few weeks ago six years you've been building it up and you just think you're gonna pick that habit just like that it's like at least for me it took me about five years to get onto like nofap where like i just honestly like it's not in my life at all i don't even think about it i often forget that porn masturbation is a thing but i was so hard on myself for the first like year or so thinking like i should get to day 90 because it's not just about like the discipline and willpower it's probably we've been building this habit for like 10 years man it's like gonna take some time to like reproduce it down i wonder how many people would benefit from nofap that aren't like pathological fappers the people who aren't completely addicted and see it as advice because one of the things i've realized recently is that with a lot of the things we do that we don't like ourselves for doing let's say using our phone too much or maybe it's junk eating on the night time or whatever it might be i would say that less than 50 of the problem is the actual activity that you do and most of the problem comes from the story that you tell yourself about the type of person you are for having done that action so a lot of the benefits i think we get from going through any type of personal development actually comes from a reframing around capturing our own agency to do with that particular action do you know what i mean yeah very very well said that's like it's like the spell curve where at first you don't really think that the original thing is the problem the vice is the problem masturbation or let's say junk food and then so you start to see people talk about you're quitting it and everything this is when you hate the thing you hate the thing you can't stop it and so there's often this negative mental well-being stage when you're trying to start you everyone kind of knows which is like when you find something ever it was a gym but it was a loose way of doing this it's like you just feel like shit for a little while because you hate the thing but you still have a habit or even an addiction to the thing and you've actually brought up a fantastic point recently i've been thinking that potentially the best way to actually improve things like this where there's no fat or healthy it's actually way more about the self-image and like the beliefs that we have about ourselves more than actually is you know like the stereotypical advice of like oh like you know install the website blocker and like don't buy the junk food and everything because if you're just going to like hide the stuff away from you like it's like a child just saying i can't i can't see the porn anymore so i can't be addicted like you know i didn't buy the junk food so i can't eat it anymore but it's more if you and you have a chocolate bar in front of us right now we're probably not going to eat it because it doesn't really align with our identity but i think oh it's just not i don't want to put it onto my fitness pile i just had the regret there like 400 calories for a month and uh we were talking about the fact that there is a tension between assisting yourself to not do the things that you don't want to do by hiding away from you or by creating constraints in your life so you don't play league of legends so you snap the game in half and delete your xbox account or whatever and there is a question i know that you're not a gamer because you just said that any gamers who listen to you right now snap the game in half yeah snap me pc in half and the problem that you have is that there is a part of you that feels defeated by that like oh i'm defeatist because i've assisted so the same as you saying like look is keeping the junk food out of the house actually putting a blinker over your eyes so you can't deal with the underlying problem that's causing the junk eating in the first place i would be tempted to say that you need to give yourself assistance in the first place like environment design is a huge part of habit building and it's probably the case that the tools you get in the beginning that get you across the first river isn't the boat that you're supposed to carry across land to get you across the second river like look the thing that you did that got you here isn't the thing that's going to get you there so if you decide to assist yourself by putting a pawn blocker on your laptop or getting rid of all the junk food out of your house or doing whatever it might be that's fine and then that will allow you to at least gain some momentum when your ability to stick to the habit is weakest then we start to build up we start to build up okay now i've got a bit more capacity i've got a bit more capacity and now maybe i can look to reintroduce looking at where does my compulsion to eat junk food don't even come from oh it's actually because i'm bored because i don't have anything to do maybe it's because i'm lonely oh well now that i've given myself room away from the junk food i can actually start to fill that with something else that's a really really good point actually yeah so the original uh environmental design i often critique i often say even though every scientist describes me and they say you know i feel like i'm the one guy right now telling everyone to lie on willpower instead because like in my story like the environmental design would never even work because it's okay i can not buy the junk food inside the store but then we've already got my home i can throw it all out i'm gonna die i'm gonna throw out the junk food but then like my girlfriend's gonna come back home with like extra food or i go to work and it's like it's like a service job at the time so i'm like motherfuckers bring in like a lot of snacks instead of eating that it's like if the idea is like you're gonna say no one's inside the shop the thing is if all you have is the environmental design you probably aren't gonna manage the entire environment around you whereas it really is that level of willpower and even like the self-image of belief that any given time we have junk food in the house all the time i finally look like i walk past the kitchen no problem every single day for like two years there's the stuff that i used to binge eat on but the reason why is because i always try to do this thing like no no don't go to the kitchen like tell my dad not to buy the crits eventually i just it's kind of like psychopathic but i got my favorite snacks just set them on the desk and just look at them and i don't think many people have done this but like oh the weird thoughts that you get about yourself when you do that you get the best snacks you've ever gotten even drugs as well so i did this with weed and i just put it on top of the table just with a notepad so i journaling and it just makes you feel like a crackhead because you're like oh like you know like the experiment's like writing a fucking oh it's to my drug i've written a poem on outside this window with a pair of roses the boombox in it talk to me so you mentioned there about this sort of um chasm of difficulty you've got self-development depression is something that you talk about what's that that's one of the first stages it's like essentially let's say you're a normal person you just kind of all you know about self-improvement is like oh yeah go to the gym eventually you find the space online you start finding the box of self-help and everything some people seem to get stuck in level one and i think that a fair amount of like healthy people seem to breeze past the stage so the healthy people that i for example have spoke to have coach they'll find out about meditation no fat whatever they'll implement it fairly straightforward exercise i'll tell them okay you're exercising almost every single day they'll do it no problem there's so many people who it's only because of mental health that they're stuck in stage one which is that they know what they should be doing they just can't seem to do it so for these people for example they would have had an idea let's say nice and simple to exercise and they'll be like oh yeah you know today's today i'm an exercise right you know it feels really relevant they'll look back and be like wait it's been three weeks since i watched that motivational video and i said i was going to exercise again they just they fall straight to the same patterns if you grab this person take them inside the gym with us make them do the best work out of their lives they're so hype and everything like you know they make some gains they're coming back the next month and it's this self-improvement depression because they are now in the space of hearing about people like me and even you yourself who have made progress and talking about fantastic life stuff that comes from this and everything and they don't get to enjoy that they just can't seem to get consistent in any of the habits they can't seem to make meditation work for them it doesn't work and everything they try so many times and it's a very very depressing and like scary place to be because you feel quite vulnerable and like you're no longer satisfied and oblivious to your old life if you're not video games and porn and everything now you know the dangers of them you've watched the videos let's do it oh like i used to play video games but now i don't play video games and look at me i want girls now and like some little guys watching that thinking like i want girls but i can't you can't if you can't slap his league legends this is what you would say exactly are you familiar with plato's allegory of the cave do you know that story no okay so uh plato gives this story about um three men that change up inside the cave and they're looking at a wall yeah the shadows on the wall right and then one of them gets freed he goes out into the world he suffers pain he can't see because it's so bright he's been in the darkness and then eventually after looking at the reflection of the world in the water and then finally the world in its full color he starts to see that oh wow the previous world that i thought this was all that existed is only only a shadow of what is available for us and he comes back into the cave and then he looks at his friends he's stumbling around he can't see because he's now in darkness he's back he's regressed back to the previous version of himself to try and communicate between where he is and where the people that he wants to bring up with him is and he says to them look guys like this isn't the real world i promise you out there there is something better it's more blissful it's fuller and they're not happy they say look you can't even see in here anymore you can't see inside the cave this was supposed to be the place that you knew and he can't see because he's seen what is true he comes back he's ostracized by the people that live at a lower resolution than him and the argument from plato is that this is the job of a philosopher it's to try and peer through it's to see what the truth is and it's to then try and tell people who need to be leveled up from that but there is a pain associated with that if the if true hell is when the person that you are meets the person that you could have been every time that you get to see the person that you could be continue to rise up and you see that through youtube videos with people that are doing things and crushing it and killing it and instagram and grumbles and blah blah every time you see that the ceiling of potential continues to move away and you need to try and catch up with it now so you just continue to feel this chasm between where you are and where you could be well and that's going to be painful it kind of reminds me of the analogy of the crabs in a bucket mentality that's very common in self-improvement whether one of the guys in the friendship group will find self-improvement and start working on themselves and find that no one else seems to want to like climb up in the same way and it's it's just blows your mind because you want to go to your friends and say look i've been lifting some weights and i finally feel confident we're all nerds and stuff like look at me i've got some biceps and stuff they'll make fun of you they're like no we don't do that type of stuff that's fucking gay yeah that's gay like come on that's my least favorite thing about british culture my least everything by far like that tall poppy syndrome is holding so many young people back that could be amazing that have got desires for growth that want to go and do something different but it's terrified because every time they're trying to do something different their immediate social circle takes the piss out of them what's that tall poppy syndrome yeah so you can imagine that you look in a field and there's a field of poppy and there's a tall one as you go through which one you're going to chop down the most likely one you're going to chop down is the tall poppy it's called tall poppy syndrome i don't know the full history of it i think it's an australian term originally but yeah tall poppy syndrome something sticks out something grows faster than everything else that's the one that gets chopped so which one would you rather be like amongst the masses and just kind of seeing the same thing as everyone else or the one of you kind of like less fast as you're on dude that's a good question that's a genuinely good question so when at the first ever time i saw john peterson live someone said to him the depth of my consciousness causes me to suffer is it a blessing or a curse to feel everything so deeply i'm like this is a really fucking smart question because a lot of the people that are in the audience they've maybe started to step out they start to look around and go look fuck maybe maybe there is more to life but by taking that decision you are inevitably going to suffer as well and john said basically you the only solution would be to regress back to a lower state of consciousness right to go into some lower resolution version of the world and a lot of people escape from their insights with drugs with alcohol with sex with extreme sports sometimes people even take their own lives in an effort to try and get away from this because they don't feel like they can find a solution and he said look it's too bloody late to regress back what you need to do is take more of the thing that poisons you until you turn it into a tonic that girdles the world around you he's like you have not less consciousness but more you go deeper you're further in and i'm watching this thing and my hairs even now man reciting the hairs stand up on the back of my neck i'm like that is so correct you need to go deeper you need to take more of the thing that you think is a challenge and you turn it into a tonic that girdles the world around you that's making me think about the beginner who starts in the gym and the first workout just absolutely kills them and i'm like how many people do this my muscles are so sore and if they stop right now or even in any sport they stop right now every single time they try to get back to the gym they'll feel the same pain or even worse than normal and it's so interesting that the more you go the less pain that you'll actually feel till eventually the pain actually becomes the pleasure like it's like we actually like like if my chest doesn't get sore i'm like oh my god like i'm like oh my god yes boys i'm finally feeling chest arms whereas before we get them our perception of pain especially in positive habits is so so skewed when you are like when you're currently in because i'm guessing the first character as he walked outside his eyes is burning everything yeah the first thing that he sees he looks at the world through the reflection of a lake so he walks and walks and walks until he hits a lake and then he doesn't see the world first the first thing he actually sees is a reflection of the world right which is kind of like the way the shadows work so he sees a lower resolution of a higher resolution thing and then eventually as his eyes finally begin to adjust he's able to look around and see the sky and the trees and the birds and the grass um so here's a fucking cool story there's a place in austin called kuya which is a uh ketamine psychotherapy nad iv vitamin iv recovery center that has sauna and cold bath and you do what's called contrast therapy so you have a sauna that goes up to 230 degrees and then you get into a cold tub a single cold tub up to your neck hands wrists full works and it's just above freezing it's like three to six degrees celsius um and when you're in the cold tub it's a very unique kind of pain because there's nothing to distract yourself you know when you're doing a workout the pain is relative to the effort that you're putting in this is completely passive pain it's simply because you're sitting there and it's short you're only in there for three minutes three or four minutes right but if you can sit and just think about the sensation that you're feeling when you sit in the cold water it stops being pain even being cold it's no longer cold it's this bizarre electric sort of like it feels like lemon like all these things that kind of wrap around the sensation have all to do with cold electricity and citrus and shit and dude it's the best mindfulness exercise just sitting in there and feeling your own compulsion to want to get out to breathe to feel pain to feel pleasure it's wild i was gonna say as you're telling that story that's just sounds like pure mindfulness training there like as in cold showers if you try to fight the pain fight the cold off it's so much worse but it's so weird if you submit yourself to the cold if you allow it suddenly like it's not it's the same exercise and everything we do the pain only is suffering if you fight it but if you allow it like the pain actually just becomes that pleasure that's what surrender is that's probably what surrender is so the first time that i went i went with my buddy zach big youtuber and we got in we were both fine then he got his own head about being in the cold and a couple of times he got out early and then the next time we went we got in the cold thing and he's and i'm thinking well you're not gonna last 25 seconds and he got out because he's in his own head and then eventually after a couple more sessions he breaks that and then he's back in nothing's changed his physiology hasn't changed at all but his relationship to surrendering to the thing he's supposed to do and this is coming back to what we said before right about framing what your habits mean to you you're getting in the cold so look is this an opportunity for you to do something which is gonna make you feel amazing which is a fascinating experience and a deep dive into your own motivations inside of your brain for three minutes that feels like 30 or is it you battling the cold is it you versus this thing and i better breathe because if i don't breathe i'm all tense no man there's a cue that i got from one of the guys i was training with and he said what would this be like if it was easier and it's such a dope cue like what would this thing that i'm doing be like if it was easier and it was we were in a plank and that was when he said it to me like hey man i just remember like what would this be like if it was easier and you find yourself actually easing into the movement and feeling stronger because you're not tense everywhere you're tense where you need to be so it's such a fucking good insight i really like that i read it in um greg mckewan's second book effortless yeah i really love that concept that comes up in so like every habit i can think of right now i found that if you think it's gonna be difficult that's the story you tell yourself it's gonna be difficult absolutely it's easy now and because of that it is easy because i think it's easy and it's fun it's going to be easy and fun whereas if for example before this call i thought yeah it's gonna be a fun conversation chris and that's exactly what it feels like if i could have been like oh my god this guy he's got 200 followers he's got 200 followers he's got a nice show and everything i'm gonna get i'm just like then it would have felt very like tense and just whatever frame of mind you put yourself in it seems like the world just reacts in that way for you yeah dude i want to talk about britney spears we need to simply have to talk about this so for the people that haven't seen uh one day ago britney spears posted a two photo carousel on her instagram with the caption free woman energy has never felt better and she is completely naked apart from a long pair of white socks and she has an emoji of a heart over her vagina and a flower over her nipple and then there's another photo if you swipe right there's another photo where she's kind of like wide-legged uh and with the same emoji setup so you can go and see this and it's got nearly three million likes but perhaps surprisingly she turned comments off um what's your what's your thoughts on that answer so there's a youtuber called alexander grace i sent you the links to his youtube video he said and um he said it in a fantastic way where he said imagine if the real feminists of the 1900s saw what was happening today like they would they would think they were lying if we told them yeah by the way like women are fighting to be more sexualized than ever to like for free post pictures of themselves so like millions of tens of millions of people can see it the real feminists of 1900s would think that you were joking they would think they were just like mocking them that this is like it's a sad state we're now i especially think about the young women and the teenagers who were kind of seeing like their idols post this and obviously we model after the people that we look up to and it's kind of like okay so in this bizarre counterintuitive way the modern feminist narrative encourages women more than ever to show off their bodies to be promiscuous which is kind of like the counterintuitive aim of the 1900s movement certainly not a linear progression between the two the thing that i fucking think we need to all apologize to her dad and say look dad maybe you were right you see that court case you see where he was basically all right okay so the story seems like britney spears's dad had control over her entire life like her estate which included her back catalog of records um i think it was like even to do with her finances how she could spend money it was it was pretty severe right and it seemed a bit sinister as well especially the way it was portrayed in the press i don't know the ins and outs of the court case but it didn't seem fantastic but also britney's had some um challenges mentally in the past which i think was what had legitimated that in the first place so anyway there's this big back and forth and it was hashtag free britney was going on for ages right they wanted to give her her life back and i don't know what the current situation of that is i feel like she might have got more validity back from her father but you think britney if this is the first thing that you do after getting if you post a fully naked selfie twice on instagram to prove your own sanity and the fact that you don't need your father i'm like i i don't know if we were right i don't know if we were right save britney maybe save britney not free britney i think to be honest you and i look at this from quite a level-headed perspective which isn't really the general consensus of the modern world around us whereas we're looking at this in like a quite critical way but i think the overwhelming majority of people see this as a positive act for the act of um expressing sexuality they'll see that this is a confident thing a brief thing to do so maybe i have too much faith in humanity but what people can let us know in comments right if you think that what your opinion of this is whether britney is um liberating herself and experimenting with the sovereignty of her own body and her own social media platform or if this is somebody that could do with the help and needs a phone call from a friend like it doesn't seem to me i would be interested to speak to the person that says like go britney after that um and it just seemed like a bad pr move as well so you just come out of a court case where you don't have control of everything because he was worried you're gonna lose your ed and then you i don't know for some people it's not just things about the other i mean britney's come on britney it's been a while how long was like her first single 20 probably 25 years ago or some but that's another interesting thing we were talking about this offline um what happens when you very quickly gain status and think about child stars um and this is an interesting one for you man britney spears macaulay colkin and brett weinstein eric weinstein john peterson people at kind of the opposite ends of life and maturity but both of which can be just gifted global renown immediately how the fuck you supposed to deal with that status like the human brain was not meant to be able to receive international acclaim and be known by millions and millions of people like like that honestly that's why you see so many of these like child celebrities with mental breakdowns like it used to be in quite horrifying ways to kind of kind of funny to the general population i think either it's britney spears or something like from the head off the hair off and everyone's laughing about it and everything but it's only now as more like as we were saying normal people are starting to get fame and you know you and i are branching into like the dark territory where we're like somewhat normal somewhat not and like we can start to see like we haven't talked about this you must get some kind of like comments every now and then it does like mess you up sometimes because we haven't even fathomed the power of the internet yet and when you do read a comment it's in my belief that it feels exactly like a person in front of you saying that and we do get a critical comment from someone if this evolutionary thing inside of us like kicks off you know puts us in a fight of light thinking if you don't act right you'll be your guard is right imagine that with 10 people that's scary imagine that with 100 well that's life-threatening now imagine with like literally a million people no wonder these guys are like literally taking naked pictures of themselves i would love to know the motivation behind that photo so fucking interesting but you are right like people remember the insults and forget the blessings that negativity bias is a hell of a drug and it's everywhere but i don't know les would not be swayed by that les would be completely fine and he would just get something what he's got to do next all right so give me give me your thoughts on red pill youtube yeah um it's mixed because a fair amount of people and somewhat including myself have found some value in them and it's there's absolutely value in having like older men give you wisdom in the other videos and they'll say for example like don't pedestalize women they're just normal people and everything the issue is that those type of videos don't really do well on youtube what does better is like okay we hate women now and treat them like garbage and they have to like fuck them and like throw them out and everything is like how to do like degenerate type of stuff and this issue now is the internet's very very nuanced and so any kind of red pill youtuber that you're gonna come across is usually on this side of quite like quite a degenerate negative hateful hostile personality and i've certainly i'm not even example i've certainly branched into this multiple times um the issue is that what does best for views and for likes and for growth on youtube which is an admirable you know it's a business at the end of the day it's how people make it that isn't what is best for a young man's mind so the red pill youtubers who are very popular right now are almost entirely just a negative influence in my opinion they do teach some things so for example a young man who's some lots of red pill youtubers will for example learn something which will help him the next year he speaks to but the issue with that is that by emulating the red pill youtubers that he sees the only girls that he can that red pill youtuber are attracting and the red pill youtuber if he says all women are hoes and then he's teaching you how to text girls well he's telling you how to text the hose so now the young man's following that advice any good healthy woman is not going to be attracted to the way he'd like text right in this example only the hoes are going to be attracted to it so it becomes a self-filling prophecy like people said this to me multiple times as i was going through my red pill journey myself i couldn't really understand that you're the blue pillers you can't trust them and everything obviously you really do like take a huge step back and you realize like you've just picked a hole yourself to attract the women that you actually do hate dude oh i mean think about here's a good example think about the girls that fresh and fit invite around like they purposely go out of their way to find the thottiest most ratchet degenerate girls that they can from the streets of miami and they invite them around and have some drinks and then they use it as their opportunity to outwit the only other people in miami that they can who are these nightclub girls and then use that to like their intellect stands on the shoulders of girls that are five tequilas deep and i'm fucking adamant i'm fucking adamant that the fact that fresh from fresh and fit is seen as an alpha male by some corners of the internet i'm fucking certain that that is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse like that is the biggest forget covid forget trump forget january 6 the fact that that man is seen as an alpha is the worst comment on culture in the modern era that i could give which one is fresh he's the one that always sounds like he's got food in his mouth oh my god he just got rumbled he just got rumbled for being on a seeking arrangement so he has this chick on the channel and he invites around and they start talking about how i know that she's different she's this sort of a girl she meets him at this boat party then everybody finds that she's got this tiktok account where she says the only type of guys that she likes and then just switches to a photo of a bucket load of cash she's got a channel on seeking arrangements and it's like luxury lifestyle fitness lifestyle exclusive parties and it turns out that that's how he met her he's got this weird story about how he was at a party in miami with this basketballer and then this basketballer said oh i fucked that girl as well on your instagram hey why don't you come back to my where's the good parties tonight and then fresh ends up taking him around and ends up having like sex with five girls in one night or something like dude this is like jay from the in between us this legitimately sounds like sorry i'm over there and i'll fucking with my toe and you think oh my god what the fuck is wrong with these people yeah i'm not gonna lie man my first perception of them was like i saw like quite a lot of like crazy content and you know there's just girls asking the thumbnail and everything and it is definitely entertaining to watch because it is just like kind of degenerate shit that you know like i don't want the door to open i don't want the door to open i'd rather just switch porn honestly but um there's just the issue is right with stuff like that again it's inherently just negative media there's so people reply you know they say i don't think it would have i think any realizations or insights that you've really got from at least the the show that they do with the girls it's just kind of like you need to watch one episode or just read books it's exactly like women are like they just reply the exact same thing they're just quite different girls and it's just like your men are consuming it just as an addiction to like youtube like your content consumption i will go to say though that they're they do shows with like other guys so they don't show like rollo tomasi jay waller and um sterling cooper and those ones it's so different i wish they did more because they're actually given some like great wisdom and it was a totally different vibe where they're thinking of like the young man and they think of hey guys you should like focus on your credit score and everything it's like that's my good advice right there but the issue is like that doesn't sell those ones will get a lot less views that's what we want to see we kick these holes out like that's what it's a drama channel someone said what was it it's jerry springer for the tiktok generation that's what that's what someone fucking commented about here's the thing and i'd be interested to know if you're the same when i first started watching fresh and fit kevin samuels there's a part of me that i noticed that gets satisfied by watching that like yeah yeah you fucking you take those thoughts down you take those bitches down i'm like whoa whoa where are you coming from like what part of me is it that takes satisfaction from watching guys that are prepped shit on girls that have just come to come and sit in a podcast studio it's the big part like the part of you that still remembers getting rejected from girls and everything it's like this is like us indulging in that thing yeah that's it because to imagine how many guys that is so attractive to because how many guys that's a part of us right now if we're doing okay with the girls it's like a part of us still remembers and it was it's hateful for the fact that we got rejected by this one girl about hundreds of girls imagine how many guys are like literally not attracting any women whatsoever all they had this one part that is just them it's just hateful resentful and then they go on to a show where girls get made fun of them you know the girl says something like no but here's the fact like here you didn't research like we did like that guys feel like some kind of fulfillment from that yes finally like they're getting put in their place it is so attractive to the the huge proportion of guys who've been hurt by women yeah yeah it is and it feels like vindication and it feels like catharsis as well you have these guys there that are and i think that's one of the reasons why you get a particular type of very loyal following for them which is they almost feel like they're the best of us you know they're the tip of the spear that's delivering the words to the girls that righteously should have been shit on long ago you know if i went back and told that girl that snubbed me in the nightclub four years ago that i still remember because i haven't done any self-work or meditation or be to see a fucking therapist which i definitely need that's them saying to all of the girls that have rejected you what you always wanted to say so it feels nice i can emphasize with the hundreds of thousands of young men who are actually watching this with a sense of enjoyment because they didn't get to ever say the thing is like be better be better and this is what they're choosing right now there's no growth coming from this but it is that sense of instant gratification of pleasure of just thinking like oh yeah like at least a part of you feels like you're like fulfilled when you get a sense of like revenge against the person who hurt you yeah one of the things as well i think you talk about this is that a lot of the content i don't like that comes out with the manosphere red pill youtube space is the stuff that is predicated on shitting on women rather than raising up men that that that puts me in the least positive mindset it puts me in the least grateful place it makes me feel anxious it makes me feel on edge it makes me feel it's like the difference between it's like that's my dopamine system as opposed my serotonin system i don't feel good i don't feel nice i don't feel connected i feel agitated and anxious and i get pleasure but i get pleasure with this sort of it's like it's like watching some like fucked up porn and then afterwards feeling a little bit disgusted at yourself for what you've just watched and yeah it's not when i watch that stuff it's not my highest my highest self isn't coming through that's not adonis olez that's that's jeffrey that's jeffrey it really is man it's it's the problem with the internet the new ones i could use this explanation for everything we talk about but the internet is turning into such a negative place because that's what sells that's what we're clicking on seeing a girl get kicked out of the studio is a lot more attractive than like seeing the same guys talk about like oh here's 531 yeah because like you know this is this is more valuable but the thing is are we even looking for value anymore are we just looking for like cheap entertainments and so this is the one that sells an issue with this is like there is a certain value with this with a negative influence on your personality and at least for me when i was fully consumed by this type of content even before fresh and fit came out if my personality was fucking trash like i know like a lot of guys i was like i saw girls as like the enemy to conquer and so it's the pick up artist age a lot guys go through and i never saw them as like a person to like this sounds blue pill to see how deep i went into it like i've got to even catch up am i blue pill no like is he trying to convert me to blue pill i used to see girls as like not someone to like sort of build things on the same team they were almost the enemy even if we were doing good together i was always like wary of everything yeah i always thought i had to conquer them in like a very negative way whereas recently like i've taken a big step back from that therapy as you said meditation journaling reading books on dating reading books on attachment styles i think the childhood stuff is like very very important here and i realized i was like i love being around women like i've made videos like videos and again it's that negative like um i made videos like i hate women and stuff but it's the epic and i say you know different things on it but i've actually started to love being around women and love having that feminine energy around me and it's like the moment that you kind of like level things up with her feels it's such a beautiful experience that i was always ignorant to because i was entirely focused on like the number clothes and the leg clothes and when you're doing it as like a mathematician and you're thinking okay i've got a three percent success rate so i've just got 100 goals like you're literally seeing them more as like a number than you are a human being who could be a compliment to your life but dude the red pill pickup at least pickup was started by aspergic and autistic guys i had no idea how to communicate with women so the fact that there's a lot of special market value peaks graphs fucking pictograms and scores out of 10 it doesn't surprise me because that's what a lot of people that began this movement thinking you know there were programmers coders nerds that couldn't get women and there's this zero sum mentality in the man's sphere i was listening to the mating grounds podcast have you heard of this okay so tucker max who is the used to be the ceo of scribe media created the fratite genre wrote i hope to serve beer in hell like basically fuck girls and threw up in bathrooms for a decade and then wrote about it and created new york bestsellers did a ton of psychotherapy and psychedelics and now is flipped the other way with jeffrey miller who wrote the mating mind he's one of the like premier evolutionary psychologists that focuses on mating dynamics and they did a podcast and it stopped eight years ago so it is one of the best podcasts you can go back and listen to it's called mating grounds it's so fucking dope a guy that's field tested and a guy that's got the academic chops to go with it talking about the fundamentals of male female attraction dating dynamics but they say they're talking about pickup but you see and this is the fascinating thing it's like eight years old right this episode i listened to this morning and it's the same fucking dynamics it's not neil strauss and mystery and pickup and real social dynamics anymore it's now fresh and fit and kevin samuels and roller tamasi and red pill and manosphere and alpha and beta and black pill and blue like that's the language language has changed but the dynamics are exactly the same and they're saying the entire pickup artist community sees any woman's gain as a man's loss and any man's gain as a woman's loss so they see a very adversarial relationship they go into a club and they talk about pickup like you pick something up it's an action that you do they talk about game and banging and it's all of these terms that if you break them down it's all to do with a very aggressive zero sum mentality but they're saying that if you bet a woman it's almost her loss that's the mentality that pickup went into it with and i think you still see that now it's adversarial relationship as opposed to a positive mentality i'm like fuck man i don't want to be a part of that at all that's interesting do you feel like they might have a hidden sense of self-awareness that they see if the woman's losing out when if she's having sex with him it's almost because they're aware of the fact that they aren't like good men yep i think so and i think as well that when you when you obsess so much over the dynamics it takes you out of the moment now you can have you can critique women that go on all night stands all you want but you still want a one night stand as a young guy so you're asking women to adhere to standards that you're not encouraging to adhere to in your real life hang on there's something going on there you can't point a finger at women and say you're a slut if you have a one night stand then go out and use all of the tricks that you found from neurolinguistic programming to pick up the neck into all of that shit to then get them into bed and then feel disgusted at the woman for having done it it's like fuck me there is no positivity in that situation every single step of the way is negative and you know i think that there probably are some norms that we need to redress around casual sex i think that people probably do give away their bodies too quickly and i think that recreating a sense of sacredness around uh putting yourself inside of someone else's body is probably a pretty good thing to do i think that would be generally good for society but you still need to see like how fucking negative and most of this stuff is 100% agreed and honestly that was me that was like i was the judgmental guy that women shouldn't be having casual sex it was what i wanted and so now i'm mocked that sort of personality type using the jeffrey character saying like women are all sluts why won't they be my slut it's like they don't actually hate women for being sluts these aren't like philosophical men who understand the detriments of a society that engages in casual sex these are just guys who pissed off that they're not the ones women having sex with they're not they don't like it's easier for them to say oh yeah you know because women shouldn't have sex because it's bad for them it's bad for the society it's easier for them to say that than it's to say yeah they shouldn't you know they totally could just have sex with me but they don't want to so they shouldn't be having casual sex but you're absolutely right i think that's something that's one of the biggest things in my mind right now is like the secretness of sex and how to like reduce casual sex i'll be completely honest like i'm actually struggling with that if there's a woman i'm attracted to and she seems to be backing to me but there's been so many times where i've been releasing everything with normal casual sex i'm into like either relationships and love and everything but i'm in bed just as fast as like that it's like i can't tell if it's like an addiction or something but i find it so hard to restrain myself from engaging in that well remember you're talking you've got two systems that are running here man like the one that says i want to put my penis inside of that girl is a lot more subconscious and a lot more ancient than this one that says remember it honest i need to focus in the morning i need to make sure that i go and do my meditation you know that that push and pull if it wasn't the case that we were subject to our subconscious we would never do anything that we didn't want to do but all the time we do stuff that we don't want to do we press the snooze button even though we committed to ourselves we're going to press the snooze button we don't meditate we forget to ring our mom we do whatever it might be like all of these things are because there is something else going on and sex is one of you know it's on the bottom of myself's hierarchy of needs it is one of the fundamental elements it's like saying i told myself i was going to fast for a week but i broke after two days like that must be because i'm a bad person because i can't do the fast thing like no your biology is very very geared towards you not starving in the same way as your biology is geared towards you if you have the opportunity to have attachment free sex to do that but again over time you know this is how long have you been in this sort of mode six months maybe one year yeah yeah and how long have you spent idolizing women probably 10 years so you know say you'll give yourself your advice from earlier on yeah that's actually i very much appreciate you just saying that actually it's my own advice because it is hard man i know the dangers of casual sex and i openly speak against them on my channel because for a while i branched away from it in the sense okay women should not have casual sex but you know men are different and highly men can do it shut up bro but now i realize like after speaking to another youtuber elliot holtz and speaking about fatherlessness it's caused by both men and women engaging in casual sex that it's issues like there is just a complete detriment to society when either one of us engages in that because it just leaves a generation of fatherless boys and those fatherless boys are more likely to continue the same thing it's the hard times where it's wrong men paradigm is happening has your camera just gone that's right yeah i was again this jeffrey miller thing i was listening to earlier on i would add one book in i'm only halfway through it's called mate and it's by jeffrey miller and tucker max and it's a needlessly psychologist and a guy that's partied for a decade um become the man women want and it's just it's like it's a bit of a cringe title i guess it gets across what it is i think it's a really interesting read for girls as well i think models by mark manson as well is really interesting for girls to see their own need that neediness dynamic basically mark says that one of the fundamental um dynamics that goes on between men and women is a level of neediness and that neediness from a man is fundamentally unattractive and basically that's what you need to avoid at all costs one of the best ways to not be needy is to have a life that doesn't need anybody else in to make it fulfilled you you are enough and then somebody joins and you make a life that is better together for both of you as opposed to you are not enough you're insufficient and a girl comes in and fills the void because then you're constantly going to be pining after that girl it's a weak position to negotiate from but so this is fucking eight years ago man right jeffrey miller who wrote the making mind which is like one of the foundations for pretty much everything else that grew out of it jeffrey miller says that only 10% of the pickup in manosphere world understands his work he reckons that more than 50% of his sales were to the manosphere and even though they idolize jeffrey almost none of them understand his work the entire point was to understand what women want but no one focuses on it so what is the summary that you've got from that work so far uh it's a list of five different things and in there is tell the truth like one of the one of the things is to constantly tell the truth to build up self-esteem in yourself another one is to um not work with bias but to work with uh rationality uh i wonder what i'll be interested to find out where the rational male came from i wonder whether that was an influence on on rollo and what he did but it's not got this sort of very neggy very distasteful degenerate sort of zero sum mentality at all you sent me this video of the future is polyamorous what do you reckon about the future relationships can you see that happening yeah 100% i watched that video and honestly really opened up my eyes after i watched your podcast with uh vincent but yeah um so you guys are discussing the sexual marketplace and how it's just getting more and more cut through i mean like a one hour video in response where i was just kind of like just you know good ideas and just seeing what would happen and we're entering some dark times for us young men the fact that i think at the end of your podcast you were really like sort of taking the back thinking of like the seriousness of this problem i don't think we you know we're just kind of chatting about how we get girls and everything but this is like this is yeah this quite literally is like a 10 out of 10 like disaster just waiting like it's happening right now and everyone's not really taking it serious because it's just oh you know like i just want to get laid but it's a huge huge problem and the idea is okay what is going to happen in the future if you think well relationships amongst young people and even sex is like it's just going out of place no one's really getting into like a monogamous committed long-term relationship people who are getting into monogamous relationships are often finding that their relationships end 6-12 months later and then like in fidelity and everything and the idea is that women just keep you know with hypergamous nature they just keep wanting better and better and better and better men and because the top men that all the women want are ruthlessly competitive it's like this this section of men let's say the top 10% is becoming ever harder to get into let's say 50 years ago it was like he didn't stink in a car and all the girls were after him now it's like you need everything you you need like you need six back you've been training for six years in the gym you need like your the mental like confidence and the degree postgraduate degree you need everything these days as a man to like be in this top 10% so it's just going to get more and more ruthless women want the men in here the thing is the men in here don't just want one woman if you're the guy who's essentially beaten 90 something percent of other guys in some three characteristics chances are like a lot of guys do say you know i was just like i just want one woman if you had the ability to attract more than one woman i think the overwhelming majority of guys will actually accept that proposal and be with two women instead in like let's say in a dating market and i think we're going to see this more and more and i think alexander grace the youtuber who made that video of believe me be normal he had this fantastic point where he said that he thinks feminists are actually going to push this narrative not men because it's going to be like this sort of like new age fight for like more rights in a sense where like women would rather be as well as massive women would rather share an alpha than be saddled with a faithful data if that's the case if the next frontier for feminism is opening up polyamorous relationships colligionous relationships technically um if that's the next frontier for them i i don't think that the future looks very good for civilization because that is if that's a cause that women start to campaign for that's the sort of thing that men are going to riot and kill about and there's such a cool study have you ever seen that graph before the one where he's what was that guy's name the youtuber yeah where alexander found a graph that showed the relative number of men versus the relative number of women that were giving birth to children presumably this must be genetic data somehow and um you can see that from about 50 000 years ago until 10 000 years ago it's relatively equal like women are a little bit higher because on average uh women are more successful at having children than men are women are a little bit higher men are a little bit lower but kind of tracking similarly and then 10 000 years ago the men just drop off a cliff got it basically zero it looks like who which men are having children here there's no one and his argument was that during the agricultural revolution what you had was the ability for men to accrue status and resources which afforded them the ability to have huge harems of women that they could keep safe but then what they realized was that it was an incredibly unstable society for men to be in and i had an evolutionary biologist on the show joe henrik the other day and he said that a lot of uh south pacific islands and uncontacted tribes and stuff have been studied some of them have a what's called a it's like a gentrietric i think or gerific or something uh which is the old people the ones that are in charge um and men have to go through a number of rituals before they can marry and often it keeps them until their 30s before they can do this but what that leaves you with is a ton of available women that are captured by a bunch of old men and then a shit ton of young men that are coming up that think i've got to do my next ritual in three years time i can't get a woman at the moment because they've all been captured by these guys and these stupid rituals and this ideology that we've got fuck it left for all and it's just an inherently unstable society so that's the thing nobody wants that nobody wants that society when they actually look at it nobody wants the unstable sexless underclass of men roaming the street shit like that's bad for absolutely everybody and i don't know i don't know if polygyny is as realistic as alexander makes out because modern notions of romanticism have skewed what women expect a lot and i think that it's not sufficient for women in relationship to simply get their fair share of resources they actually want to feel emotional connection and time with their partner and if you end up having you know one man to three women or one man to four women like is one quarter of that man's attention going to be enough for you i'm not sure there's only things to break down there but the last point you made in terms of the media influencing that's huge the media very very heavily influences our dating and our sexual lives and it was a realization i had let's say 50 years ago disney was a huge thing that pushed forward like the blue pill ideology and like the one-nighters belief you know like they got happily married like happily ever after what's very interesting is like that media is very very different like i don't consume much media i can almost like envision so like new age sitcoms and you know like reality tv shows where it's like the modern stuff of the day you're seeing it in the show you're gonna see this one girl like oh she just had a drunk and hook up with this guy who didn't text it back and like she wants this guy this guy this guy maybe she'll go on a date and they had three times together or something you're beginning to see it because media influences us but we also influence like the media and of course some random show that shows these dynamics are gonna be quite relatable amongst a certain audience so we are gonna see like i don't watch it personally but i know for a fact there's gonna be some tv shows that are doing really well right now which will have quite a prominent character being a part of this like modern new age dating well do you think about what love island does love island turns i'm fucking a part of this problem right i understand that it's the pot calling me capital black they turn dating into a game like it is a game show first and foremost after everything after you've been through six weeks there's been vote offs there's been surprise additions there's been casa and all people come in you've been worried about losing his partner it's been a really intense experience you've been you've got a wicked tan and at the very end you've won here's some celebration oh wait now you get to play would i lie to you or deal or no golden balls you get to do split or steal and i've always been really interested about why that was there and i asked the guys on my season like what was going on with that but what it tells us like it's the final thing that you see on the entire season which the whole season it's a parenthesis or it's a period at the end right the full stop is will you split or steal this 50 000 quid which is a pointless exercise now because the money that you make off the back of it if you've made it to the end and you've won is so much more and if you were to steal the amount of money that you would make from your boohoo sponsorship would go through the floor because you wouldn't have as much brand equity anymore because you'd be the dick that stole 25 grand um it just reminds everyone it's a game that's what it does it's a show that is called love island that is essentially supposed to be about love and at the end of it it reminds everyone that actually wasn't so much about the relationship there was this game show element to it as well that doesn't seem like a tremendously effective romantic way to teach young people about caring about the relationship everyone's swapping beds twice a week new guys come in oh i like it i'm with him but i like him i know i'm with her but i'm gonna like what's what does roller call it uh branch swinging yeah i'm gonna branch swing across this i'll dip my toe in and see whatever's going on fuck man that's so interesting a show called love island is heartless that's like the modern day in that we're literally surrounding ourselves of course this is like to an extreme level and it's for the audience the viewership and everything but honestly they're not that far off normal dating lives anyway a lot of it is recreating what people in like let's say the young party casual sex scene are experiencing because honestly like if you're someone who's been like a bit of fuckboy equals clubs and everything like you know that dynamic that's why it's so relatable and so fun to watch because the questions that you're asking people is like the questions that i'm asking yesterday and it's like oh there's another guy's gonna move me off for the girl and everything like it's so realistic but just when you really think about the fact it's literally just like all over the place like this is modern dating is just kind of like the fast food version of the healthy version that we may have gotten to experience like 100 years ago fuck i don't know and i also don't understand like i agree i think the one has worked i think you really nailed which is this myth of the one there is not one person out there for you there are a number of people that are uh variably appropriate and the goal is to find somebody that is as close to appropriate as possible now that's not to say you can't feel incredibly special and like you have a team in a community and this is what you're going to do and especially once you have kids but okay like this is with together through thick and thin here you know i don't want my kids to grow up in a single parent household i'm gonna do everything i can to make sure that doesn't happen i don't know how you blend um love island transient transactional relationships with the myth of one-itis with progression for uh women and men to not have rights removed from them and norms removed from them that restrict their premarital sex with the challenges in women raising up through the dominance hierarchy and there being fewer men hypergumously they're attracted to them i'm like all this blended together just to me do you know it is man it feels like fucking don't look up which is a new netflix show about an asteroid that's coming forward and these couple of researchers are screaming at the president of the united states and saying this is going to come and this is going to kill us we need to do something about it right now and nobody listens and they say well you say it's 99.9 let's call it 70 we'll get a press release i'm like no no no don't call it fucking 70 this is a big deal this is a planet killer and then it ends up being everybody gets this right i tried to wrap my mind around the potential solution to all this and i can't think of any good answers whatsoever and the only one that comes to mind is things keep going the way that they are and instead of the bottom 80 percent of sexless intimacy love deprives men revolting they all just get consumed by the metaverse and that's the new reality they find a sense of like love and i'm being serious i think that's actually the most realistic scenarios a few years from now we have like ultra realistic sort of virtual reality and guys are just trading an hour of cuddling 0.1 ethereum and that's that'll do it i mean you'll see this in your youtube comments i've definitely seen it in some of the red pill videos that i've done where guys will say the more migtary black pill guys will say um don't need to bother with women just wait for the sex robots and buy cars in the meantime and i'm thinking well i mean it's a solution it's not i wouldn't say it's not the most solution it's not the one i would choose but i understand the compulsion of a guy who feels like he can't get physical intimacy or find a woman or wife that cares about him i understand why that would be attractive and maybe you're right maybe the best the second best option if revolt is the worst option maybe the second best option is sedation if you sedate the populace with enough metaverse and virtual reality and convenience to the point where people genuinely men genuinely don't care about mating anymore but even that i can't imagine me being that guy i don't that's not the sort of life i want and again i understand that not everybody has the same life experiences but fuck that like did you did you really want to grow up for this to be the pinnacle of your life to be honest i feel like the sedation is already has been happening for many many years video games porn social media i think the majority of guys are so consumed in this technology that they wouldn't ever revolt and like life is like good enough for the majority of guys and the things that they miss from real life like a sense of brotherhood status and recognition they get in games like quality the things they miss in the date in the sexual market because they're not part of the guys who aren't allowed to get that stuff they get from like tv shows and porn and just fantasies and sending pics on instagram so although it doesn't essentially fulfill the exact need the thing is the businesses that sedate a person and make them feel like somewhat like they tick off those bottom pillars of those industries are like billions like hundreds of billions because that's that's where billions of men are going to and you were saying you couldn't imagine like this that made me realize okay usually if i do see those those comments of like the men saying men going their own way and black pill you know usually i'm instantly like okay loser like i don't know why you're doing that just focus on self-improvement and everything but lately i because of your podcast i've been thinking more about this and i've been thinking are men like you and i live in our life through the lens of someone who isn't genetically sounds horrible like genetically sort of subpar and that's why we're saying things like oh you know i want to live that life but it's like we're tall attractive guys we've got good features and everything we couldn't imagine a life like that but what about for the guy you couldn't imagine a life like that even if you know you know what's weird did you watch again you don't use a massive amount of social media but molly may who won love island a couple of years ago she traded on twitter uh this week because she made some pretty tone-deaf comments about how people that are poor just need to work harder and they can do whatever they want and someone mentioned that she works for a pretty little thing and gets 600,000 pounds a year but pretty little thing pay their workers three pounds fifty so it's very difficult it doesn't matter how hard i work i'm stuck in a poverty trap and it kind of feels maybe a little bit like that there is a degree of blindness to people for whom there is a ceiling on it on their capacity for growth personal agency sovereignty so the black pill in incel forums on average it's 30 percent of people to 50 percent of people have some sort of autism spectrum disorder so they're aspergic they're autistic or they might be disabled physically and you think when you learn that's that you're like me telling you that you need to go read atomic habits by james clear just doesn't cut the mustard but i mean frankly i don't think that me or you were speaking to them like that's not my audience bro like i feel for you you know there is a channel of interesting content for you here but genuinely i feel like your situation requires more specialist assistance than i can give it um this is for the this is written for the me and you 10 years ago right that's what the content is created therefore and to pick out anything you say is a generalization and to pick out that one example that doesn't fit the generalization you're like oh okay cool but i can't make a one-size-fits-fucking-everybody solution here we're just trying to give across the best tactics that we found that work for us that will hopefully apply to the widest group of guys and girls 30 to 50 percent man it's interesting like our content's not really calling out to them for me the reason why i do try to like help these guys and i make videos for the guys who are total losers and everything is because i've been there and honestly like i i could have been an incel at this point and it's so interesting okay everyone would be completely no i'm just six or one you've got the jawline your genetics like face and everything but i could have been and like honestly i wasn't that far off at that point to be black pill and everything if i stumbled down onto like a black pill subreddit if there was one at the time you know if i started engaging in that type of content i probably would have been one of these guys saying i know it's over for me because i'm brown skinned and everything in fact that was like one of the beliefs that i genuinely thought i was like ugly because i'm brown skinned and no girls wanted me and then just something just hit me i think i started weightlifting at first and you envision the body i just thought wait i'm still brown but like i'm still gonna be attractive like there's definitely brown guys who like getting girls right now so it's in the fact that i'm brown that i'm not getting the success that i want but i don't think we're relatable like at all to a large chunk of men and i think a big part of that is obviously the characteristics that they say you know like negative candle till they've got some good hunter eyes and prey eyes so you've got hunter eyes is like where your eyes are like um almond shaped and they're quite close to your eyes this is like quite close to your eyebrows and it makes you look like a hunter in the sense of like you know wolf has like those eyes and prey eyes like so like i've got prey eyes which are like that's what they always say they make videos about me as i have prey eyes and stuff they say like he's got good jawline he's attractive and everything but his eye region lets him down like this is going to do it hurts like sunglasses and stuff now but it's like prey eyes are more like circular eyes if you know like rabbit eyes so you can see more of a scope around you you know what's very interesting there is an open-coming black pill youtuber called wheatwaffles and he was like um like treading the path for the black pill content just a few months ago i got onto podcasting we argue a lot and everything we disagree with each other it was like very very bad sort of episode and everything and then we speak more and more we literally become friends and then for the second episode a lot of people realize like he's kind of changed his mindset on a fair amount of things just out of nowhere obviously he was arguing things like what you're teaching is like a scam and getting fit getting muscle body doesn't work and everything that was on the first episode on the second one he just ran and he says yeah like the most important thing you can do is build the muscle body i was like wait that's like that's really and he went like he's changed his mind and he this is these guys are like you know like you said um very math like they're into math and data and all this so he's done like a face analysis of a thousand people quantified the highest thing like the best thing that man can do to improve how attractive he is to a woman he quantified so many different things is lose fat build muscle everything else was way less than that surgery and height and all this stuff but lose fat build muscle he said that pretty much every guy should at least try to do this at least try to build that body first and then find out if you like should be black pill and even though that advice is a bit like i kind of agree that's what i've been saying to a lot of guys before you take the black pill before you want to be in himself try to build a 10 out of 10 at least build like the 6 out of 10 10 out of 10 body and then just see how you feel after that if after that you say okay still no attraction for women whatsoever i'll cry with you but i can't imagine there's a guy who's got the full aesthetic body and the low body fat that comes with it who still says that he completely struggles with women and that it hasn't gotten better at all and if even if there's a small majority of men who say it hasn't got better at all i guarantee those guys will still not stop listening because it's just becoming a part of the identity yeah so you talk about we mentioned on the channel before about how on cinder there is the bottom 80% of men competing for the bottom 20% of women top 80% of women competing for the top 20% of men the inference from that is if you're not physically in the top if you're not an 8 out of 10 relative or above as a guy then you are by definition in the bottom part now one of the things that i think guys especially young guys that are listening need to know is that on average your competition for guys that are developing themselves is so piss poor that you don't actually need to be in the 80th percentile of anything you only need to be slightly better than the massive amount of guys that are not doing anything at all this is like about guys that are going to the gym if you go to the gym three times a week you're in probably the top 1% or 5% of fit people on the planet like and especially in a western country like america or the uk but i think on average everybody's overweight in both countries yeah on average you're obese the bar is set so fucking low for you to be a guy that goes to the gym that listens to some charisma on command stuff that takes a little bit from a podcast you don't need to spend a ton of money you don't need to you don't even need to work that fucking hard like you do not need to work that hard the bar is set so low for charisma for confidence for looks for everything because it's not about becoming an 8 out of 10 compared to the people on instagram it's like that story about if you're in a wood and you're worried about being chased down by a bear you don't need to be faster than the bear you just need to be faster than the fucking guy next to you honestly i love this thinking like i mean one of my favorite random videos i made was just titled your competition and i was trying to tell the boys you've got to stop thinking that you need to be like up here like a lot of guys will be on the defeatist mindset but like you know i'm not gonna go make 200k here and like six or seven and like all this like you don't need to be that good of course like that'll be nice the thing is your competition right now for the average guy who's watching this who just like one hour a day before the thing is if you do a push-up today you have literally beaten 500 million men how can that not blow your mind if you go do a good structure program you'd be pretty much every single guy apart from like the five guys in your gym were actually on a program you do that for three years four years about also working on your career or business and you've got some fantastic like you're just happy like okay let's even forget about women like you build a body that you're proud of if you're like you know you've like pain to respect disease and you're shredded and everything and now you build some money so you don't enjoy some experiences you forget about women for any sense at all your life just got an infinitely better just by slightly thinking of the competition with men around you and i wish more guys could just realize that you're not like you are absolutely somewhat we're all in competition together the thing is you the way i explain it is like we're all in competition but we're in separate races like if you're just starting off you're in the race of jeffries and those guys are not even they're running in the wrong direction they're like they're doing some weird shit like they're running the wrong race all you're going to do is beat jeffrey today and then they're going to tell the guys who beat jeffrey yesterday it's just progressive overloading all sense of your life don't man we made it hamza ladies and gentlemen people want to check out your channel where should they go just search hamza on youtube i'll be the first have you got your silver plaque have you got your silver plaque yet i put in the details and everything they take a while on the delivery but we're on like 220k back flying man look dude i've really enjoyed speaking to you i think you can't sense though thank you thank you man
EPISODE · Jan 13, 2022 · 1H 18M
#421 - Hamza - How Men Can Survive The Modern Dating World
from Modern Wisdom · host Chris Williamson
Hamza is a personal development coach and a YouTuber. Many young guys would rather watch porn and play video games than connect with the real world. This creates swathes of lonely, disconnected men and leaves women with fewer and fewer good options in the dating market. Meanwhile, Red Pill YouTube and the Manosphere can be a negative influence which keeps men stuck and demonises women, rather than helping everyone become better, happier, more attractive people. Expect to learn the biggest mistakes Hamza made when improving himself, why Fresh & Fit need to take food out of their mouth, Hamza's thoughts on Britney Spears getting naked on Instagram, how to avoid being Black Pilled with a growth mindset, if Hamza thinks the future of dating will be polygamous, why the manosphere sees women as the enemy, Hamza's reaction to Mikhaila Peterson and Rollo Tomassi's debate and much more... Sponsors: Join the Modern Wisdom Community to connect with me & other listeners - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/ Get 15% discount on Craftd London’s jewellery at https://bit.ly/cdwisdom (use code MW15) Get a Free Sample Pack of all LMNT Flavours at https://www.drinklmnt.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied) Extra Stuff: Subscribe to Hamza on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/Hamza97 Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/ To support me on Patreon (thank you): https://www.patreon.com/modernwisdom - Get in touch. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What this episode covers
Hamza is a personal development coach and a YouTuber. Many young guys would rather watch porn and play video games than connect with the real world. This creates swathes of lonely, disconnected men and leaves women with fewer and fewer good options in the dating market. Meanwhile, Red Pill YouTube and the Manosphere can be a negative influence which keeps men stuck and demonises women, rather than helping everyone become better, happier, more attractive people. Expect to learn the biggest mistakes Hamza made when improving himself, why Fresh & Fit need to take food out of their mouth, Hamza's thoughts on Britney Spears getting naked on Instagram, how to avoid being Black Pilled with a growth mindset, if Hamza thinks the future of dating will be polygamous, why the manosphere sees women as the enemy, Hamza's reaction to Mikhaila Peterson and Rollo Tomassi's debate and much more... Sponsors: Join the Modern Wisdom Community to connect with me & other listeners - https://modernwisdom.locals.com/ Get 15% discount on Craftd London’s jewellery at https://bit.ly/cdwisdom (use code MW15) Get a Free Sample Pack of all LMNT Flavours at https://www.drinklmnt.com/modernwisdom (discount automatically applied) Extra Stuff: Subscribe to Hamza on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/Hamza97 Get my free Reading List of 100 books to read before you die → https://chriswillx.com/books/ To support me on Patreon (thank you): https://www.patreon.com/modernwisdom - Get in touch. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/chriswillx Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/chriswillx YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/modernwisdompodcast Email: https://chriswillx.com/contact/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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#421 - Hamza - How Men Can Survive The Modern Dating World
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