EPISODE · Apr 20, 2026 · 51 MIN
#508: Saving Them Won't Save You
Here's what nobody wants to hear: the relationship you keep ending up in isn't bad luck - it's a pattern, and patterns have origins. In this episode, I'm unpacking the "problem and fixer" dynamic, how your childhood attachment wounds quietly write the script for who you're attracted to, and why being needed can feel so much like being loved when really, it's a wound in disguise. We get into how deception and narcissistic patterns hook the part of you that learned to earn love through overgiving and why real healing doesn't start with fixing yourself, it starts with stopping the story that you're broken. This is a call to take radical responsibility for the places you've abandoned yourself, grieve the original pain that keeps you chasing what you never received, and finally build the discernment and boundaries that don't just change your relationships, they change you. Resources: Get My Book! Liberated Love - Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire: https://markgroves.com/book —Explore My Courses: https://markgroves.com/courses Follow me and my work here: —Subscribe to my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/markgrovestv —Subscribe to my Substack: https://markgroves.substack.com —Instagram - @createthelove: https://www.instagram.com/createthelove —Facebook - @createthelove: https://www.facebook.com/createthelove Have A Question?—Have a Question For Mark That You’d Like To Hear Answered on the Podcast? Leave us a Voice Note Here: https://www.speakpipe.com/TheMarkGrovesPodcast If you want to dive deeper into Mark’s content, search through every episode, find specific topics we’ve covered, and ask him questions, go to his Dexa page: https://ask.markgroves.com Drop us a note at [email protected] for sponsor product support, questions, comments, guest suggestions, or just to say hello! This episode is sponsored by: Cozy Earth: Use code CHANGE for 20% off sitewide at http://www.cozyearth.com
What this episode covers
Here's what nobody wants to hear: the relationship you keep ending up in isn't bad luck - it's a pattern, and patterns have origins. In this episode, I'm unpacking the "problem and fixer" dynamic, how your childhood attachment wounds quietly write the script for who you're attracted to, and why being needed can feel so much like being loved when really, it's a wound in disguise. We get into how deception and narcissistic patterns hook the part of you that learned to earn love through overgiving and why real healing doesn't start with fixing yourself, it starts with stopping the story that you're broken. This is a call to take radical responsibility for the places you've abandoned yourself, grieve the original pain that keeps you chasing what you never received, and finally build the discernment and boundaries that don't just change your relationships, they change you. Resources: Get My Book! Liberated Love - Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire: https://markgroves.com/book —Explore My Courses: https://markgroves.com/courses Follow me and my work here: —Subscribe to my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/markgrovestv —Subscribe to my Substack: https://markgroves.substack.com —Instagram - @createthelove: https://www.instagram.com/createthelove —Facebook - @createthelove: https://www.facebook.com/createthelove Have A Question?—Have a Question For Mark That You’d Like To Hear Answered on the Podcast? Leave us a Voice Note Here: https://www.speakpipe.com/TheMarkGrovesPodcast If you want to dive deeper into Mark’s content, search through every episode, find specific topics we’ve covered, and ask him questions, go to his Dexa page: https://ask.markgroves.com Drop us a note at [email protected] for sponsor product support, questions, comments, guest suggestions, or just to say hello! This episode is sponsored by: Cozy Earth: Use code CHANGE for 20% off sitewide at http://www.cozyearth.com
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#508: Saving Them Won't Save You
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