Welcome to the Small Steps Podcast. I'm your host, Amy Soon. I'm a nutritional therapy practitioner, blogger at Small Eats, author of Not at My Dastal Lunch, Designer, and Avon Learner. In my nutrition practice, I help you cut through the health and wellness noise to find what works for you.
This podcast is here to educate, inspire, and empower you to grow, try new things, and live a life you truly feel good about one small step at a time. Each episode has small steps that you can try and see how they work for you. You can find all the show notes, small steps, and other episodes at small-eats.com slash podcast. Remember, the materials and content within this podcast are intended as general information only.
They are not to be considered a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Hey there. Welcome back to another episode of the Small Steps Podcast. I'm your host, Amy Soon.
It is episode 51. Today we are talking all about getting clear on the why. Before we get into that, I would love to have you pop over and give this show a review on iTunes. Most of you listen to this on iTunes, or share this with your friends on social media.
Do share the show. I would really love that this week. And if you are interested, the enamel pin is still for sale. The health care is a human right pin.
It is awesome. I designed it, and part of the proceeds go to the ACLU and the Elhammer Fund. Circling back to getting clear on the why. If you're listening to this around the time that this is coming out, it's coming out around September.
September has happened somehow. Summer isn't here anymore, even though for a lot of us it's still gonna be hot for a few more months, potentially depending on where you live. And all of this messaging comes out around when seasons change. All this messaging comes out of when seasons change.
I didn't have so earlier about summer reminders. Now we're moving into the fall. And there's this interesting thing about seasons changing and this new-ish motivation around getting healthier. So we often have a lot of goals and intentions around getting healthier.
Usually that's through how we're eating or how we're moving. And I wanted to have this whole episode talk about the why. What is behind why someone wants to change what they're eating or how they're moving? Because I wanna make sure that it's coming from a place that actually really deeply aligns with your values and what you want and how you wanna live because quite often, just because it is fucking everywhere, it can usually have some or all or a lot of motivation from diet culture, how we're raised, or other things that actually don't really align with us.
But we've been told that that's what we should do for so long that we're like, oh yeah, we're just gonna do this. And it usually doesn't work. So if you're not sure what a diet culture is, definitely check out episode 17 where I start to talk about it's a big ass conversation, the whole conversation about diet culture and the podcast. But that will give you a good primer to what exactly diet culture is.
So check that out, episode 17. So why is knowing what all this stuff is important? It's because quite often when we say that we're gonna do something, the motivation comes from something that's really not in us. It's extrinsic, not intrinsic, extrinsic is something outside of us, external.
Intrinsic is something deeply internal. Because when the motivator is from a place that's not actually really meaningful for us, or it's from a place of shame, which happens quite often and we may or may not realize it, it doesn't usually stick because it's not really aligned what we wanna do. The motivation isn't very sticky, it's gonna fall off because it's not actually something you really want. Or you can only like shame yourself in doing something for so long before you just can't do it anymore.
And then when that happens, when you stop doing the thing that you've been so motivated on, which is usually like, I'm gonna eat better, I'm gonna go to the gym every day and all that stuff. Then when we quote fail at it, we get stuck in this shame cycle where we're like, oh my God, we're a terrible person, we can't follow through with anything, we're so lazy, there's no motivation on a terrible person, blah blah blah. And oftentimes that keeps us stuck in diet culture, in this like fix it mentality that's something's wrong with us that we need to be fixed. That's when we keep searching for all those, maybe not quick fixes, but like quicker fixes or faster results or different diets or different ways of doing things.
So that's why we keep popping around because we're trying to think like, oh, this thing extrinsically will be the thing that will help me be motivated and stay motivated and all this stuff. And actually it comes from a place deeply, deeply within. And once you get those things all aligned, that's when you can actually move with more intention and see that you sticking with things better because you actually really deeply want them. So this whole episode is talking about the wise, making sure that all the things are aligned if you do wanna make change.
Or maybe you go through this episode, you do some of the things I suggest like journaling and all that. Maybe you realize that you don't need to do it, you don't want to do it, you don't actually really wanna do it. So I mentioned earlier that seasons are changing. And I forgot about this because I feel like I'm not really as much in the normal population.
I'm not really in it as much anymore because there are a lot of things I forget until someone brings it up. Like people are going back to school and that September is become the new like new year, new year, time of year, which is usually around January. So a lot of people are like, oh, people are going back to school, whether that's their kids or they're going back to school and summer is over in heavy air quotes because I know growing up in Texas, it's gonna be hot for a while. And also in LA, October can be a pretty warm month.
So okay, like summer is ending short, no one till the weather that. And people see it at the time to readjust or reset. And I, the word and recommit to doing something quote healthier. And so before we get into that, I do want to remind you with lots of love and kindness that you do not need to reset, clean up, repent or anything that you date or aid over the summer or things that you didn't do or didn't eat over the summer or any time of year, you're looking backwards, you made those decisions.
Looking forward, you have so many decisions to make in the future, like millions and millions and billions of decisions. So just because you made that decision in the past doesn't mean you're gonna make the same decision in the future. You have so many opportunities to make the same choices or different choices or any choices that you want. So if you're feeling bad about what you did over the summer or what you did over the past few months, if it's not the summer, please give yourself some kindness and compassion.
And also look into why you feel bad. Why do you feel like you want or need this reset? It's been motivated by diet culture beliefs that you have to be eating a certain way at all times and that you have to look a certain way and that way is probably smaller and that everything has to be healthier and that processed foods in any way are bad for you. It's helpful to look at that and see where is that, oh my God, I'm a terrible person, where does that come from?
What does it actually come from? Do they come from you or does it come from other things? If you're still thinking about wanting to get healthier, the biggest thing to get clear on when making health changes or honestly any change is to get clear on what your why is. So why do you wanna get healthier?
This is when journaling can be really helpful. So why do you wanna get healthier? What does that look like? What does that feel like?
What will you be able to do? Write this out and keep asking why? So if you feel like you have an answer to one of your questions, keep asking why until you feel like you hit the bottom or the core or the roots of why you wanna get healthier. Because again, sometimes if you keep going deeper, the reason why you want this might not really have to do with your health at all.
It might honestly has to do with really wanting love, acceptance, a sense of belonging, feeling like you matter, which doesn't really have to do with anything that you're eating or any way that you're moving. Quite often it's based in that. And that is something that can take a lot of work and investigation and work with a mental health professional at the therapist because the ways in which you achieve that love and attention and validation and soothing doesn't need to come from other people. It definitely can, but like all of it doesn't come from other people.
It doesn't come from looking a certain way or being a certain size, from being able to lift a certain amount or run a certain amount of speed or being able to have the quote perfect plate or whatever. It doesn't come from the approval of other people or the approval of society. Ideally it comes from you first and what you wanna do. And then finding the people that support who you are naturally and not having to force yourself into a box and being like, yes, please love me, please.
As someone that's been caught in that trap for many years. That's not really the best way or the most supportive way and the most libertarian life giving way to have love and approval. You are strong and lovely and worthy just being you as you are and then you find people or you get confirmation to people in your life are people that actually do genuinely love you and accept you for exactly who you are and are so open and excited to see you grow and evolve in whatever ways that that is. That's where that comes from.
Not from fitting a standard and fitting in a way that actually is kind of oppressive and not helpful and keeps you and the people around you small. So that's usually like the super, super, super core of the why can quite often have to do with wanting to be loved, seen, accepted, feel belonging. That's extremely, extremely normal. And sometimes health changes are like, I don't feel great in my body and I wanna feel like I can move better, I wanna feel like I can not feel so tired.
There are actual legit ways that you wanna make health changes that aren't motivated by die culture at all and maybe aren't like I wanna feel love and accept it, but I just wanna feel more like me. I have an idea and a vision of how I actually genuinely want to feel and want to move and I don't enjoy the ways that I'm showing up in the world right now because it doesn't feel aligned with me because I wanna be more content with me or I want to step away from something that I realize isn't serving me anymore. So those are wise that can be rooted in you and rooted in what you actually want. So it's important to figure out like, where do you stand?
Where do you stand here? Do you stand in the, oh yeah, this is actually deeply motivating to me and this actually really, really aligns with me. You're like, oh, maybe not. Or maybe it's somewhere in between.
Maybe it's like you are, there's still some like lingering die culturey things and there are still things where you're like, yes, and I actually really want this. They can be both, they're gonna always be a little straight as opposed to as you're working through whether that's consciously or subconsciously like moving towards what you actually deeply want and away from die culturey stuff. So another thing to get really clear on is what are your values? So if you listen to this podcast for a while, you know them a pretty big like value-based person.
Values to me are really like the guide posts that I make my life decisions around that I make most of my guiding choices around because those are things that really ground me and are actually really deeply meaningful to me in many different areas of my life. So if you haven't done a values exercise, it's pretty simple. I have one on my Facebook group that isn't very active anymore, but the Facebook group still has some cool stuff in there. The values are pretty simple.
You look at a bunch of values and you circle all the ones that are meaningful for you and then you narrow it down to about three or five. Some people prefer three, I like five. Also sometimes if there are things that feel like they overlap, they can go underneath some of those values. So once you know what their values are, that's gonna be really helpful because that's gonna give you a lot of clarity on what you again, what you deeply want.
So once you have your motivation on why you wanna make your health changes and you have your values, look at those together. Do they match each other? Do they compliment each other? Do they work well together?
Do they align with you? How do those things feel? Like looking at both of those? How do they feel in your body?
How do they feel in your soul and your heart? Like when you look at both of them, how does it feel? Does it feel good? Does it feel supportive?
Does it feel like, this is kind of off or like, oh, this is really great. Like this is an improvement too. Something that I've done before. Looking at both of those, you can really clearly see if maybe your whys are motivated by you or if they're not motivated by you.
They could also in addition to diet culture, they could also be internalized beliefs that you have from your community, from your parents, from other people in your life, from an idea that you had one time because you really looked up to someone and they did these things and so you wanted to do these things. Maybe they were rooted in diet culture. So what would be being rooted in diet culture? If you haven't listened to episode 17 or if you just wanna prefer, things that would be rooted in diet culture would be repensing or making up for any bad decisions that you made, trying to get back on the wagon and trying to get back on track or trying to get to a better place and that better being a really specific, narrow view of what health looks like.
Maybe some weight loss motivation that is actually not motivated by you, but is motivated by other people and other pressures and might not be actually something you really know for sure that you want. Anything that isn't really motivated by what you want or what you need or in a pursuit of looking a certain way, but that isn't again, like super meaningful. It's just like, oh yeah, this is just what we do. Like we all work for the pursuit of thinnest and then that's how I'm accepted many, many ways that could actually circle back to diet culture.
So it would be helpful if you listened to episode 17 or if just carrying these examples is enough. So look at your whys, are they rooted in diet culture? Also, as always, as I say in lots of these episodes when I'm asking you to look at your stuff and sometimes that's not always super pleasant and sometimes it can be surprising. This is not a time or a place.
Actually, there are no times and no places, at least in the world that I create to beat yourself up or to shame on yourself or shit on yourself or say that you're a terrible person for subscribing to diet culture because you didn't really have a choice. That's also some sort of depression work. They are just everywhere all the time and usually we don't opt in. We don't sign up for that email newsletter of diet culture.
It's usually just like automatically sent to our mental inbox and we don't have any choice, usually. This is not the time or place to beat yourself up about decisions that you made, the mindset that you've had, things that you believed. The important thing is to realize that you don't want those things anymore and to move forward in a way that actually does align with you. And you have learned things from that.
You have learned what you really want and what you don't want. I think it's a really important thing to remember that when you know what you don't want, sometimes it makes what you do want really, really clear. Quite often when I ask people like, well, what do you want? And they're like, I don't know.
And if I ask, well, what don't you want? The list of what you don't want usually is pretty free-foying. So it's okay to know that, oh, I did a thing and I really don't want to do this anymore. It's totally fine.
It's actually sometimes the way that people fear stuff out. So if you do find that there is a misalignment between your motivations, your wise and your values, as always, you get to decide what you want to do with this information. You can change your wise. If you feel like, yeah, there actually is something here.
Or maybe you've got the kind of like, some of the stuff that's diculture and some of the stuff is like, yeah, deeply motivated for what you want. You can make adjustments to your wise and see if there are other reasons why. If there are other things that you're like, you know what, I actually really want to do this because of XYZ. Maybe that's the case.
Maybe you realize that you don't need a health goal right now. You don't have to pursue a health goal if you don't actually really want a health goal, which I'm sure sounds very strange to you as someone who is a nutritionist, as someone who this entire podcast is focused on health and wellness. Health and wellness doesn't always have to be pursuing. It doesn't always have to be adding or pushing harder.
It can just be sustaining or honestly, it can be taking a break because you're not a robot. You don't always need to be feeding the health machine so to speak. You could just be, you could just chill. Or you can just listen to information or listen to stuff, knowing that you're not gonna do anything with it right now.
You're just collecting information. Like when I was talking about in another podcast, I can't exactly remember which one, but if you listen to it, you'll remember where I talk about very hungry caterpillar and how he caterpillars in general, eat a lot of things and then they chill and then they turn into a butterfly. Like sometimes you need to see all the stuff and then chilling and then you get clear on what you wanna do and then you quote to transform or then you make a decision or then things like build up and you're like, I'm gonna do this thing. I'm not gonna do this thing.
I'm just gonna absorb if you want. Feel like it's a quote, a newer idea. And one that's being like reinforced more and more slowly of like if you don't want to, it doesn't actually align with you. Like you don't have to do it.
Health can be a thing that you pursue throughout your life, it doesn't have to be a thing that you actively always pursue all the time. You can just maintain, you can just live your life, you can take a break. It's totally up to you and what you want and what you need and what feels good for you. And if right now you're like, I'm gonna take a break, that's fine, if that's what you want and that's what you need, go for it.
If you do feel like you want to pursue it still, maybe there are different ways or smaller ways that you pursue it. Maybe there are other things, maybe the goal doesn't become weight loss anymore or fat loss, maybe it shifts to like, oh, I really wanna take care of myself and here are other ways that I wanna take care of myself. I really don't have to do with body composition changes. There are plenty of ways to take care of yourself and that's honestly a bigger view, a more holistic view, than just focusing on making your body small.
Because the thing about diet culture is that it really focuses on and isolates honestly two ways of taking care of yourself, most of the time. What's your eating and how you're moving? And I'll talk about this later, a little bit later, but there are so many more ways to focus on your health and take care of yourself than just those two things. And we've been told just those two things for so long that people think like, oh yeah, that's the only way that I'm gonna get cold health here.
I'm like, well, not really, no, there are many other ways. So maybe you think about, if I don't wanna focus on weight loss anymore or fat loss, what are other ways that I wanna take care of myself? Working on stepping away from diet culture and navigating what health is like without diet culture, what your life is like without diet culture. You always get to choose what you wanna do with you.
If you need to take a minute, if you need to, you know, be like, huh, I don't really know, I'm gonna step away, I'm gonna let it simmer a little bit, then struggle back to it in a few days or a week or whatever, you get to decide what you wanna do, which could be, you're not gonna do anything, you're not gonna pursue it, you're gonna adjust, or you're like, yeah, this really works. You get to decide at all times because you know you best. So if you still feel like you wanna make this change and you're a wise, a line, and you're a values, a line, and everything like comes together, in addition on the wise, get really clear on what healthy looks like for you. And know that healthy can change in different points of your life depending on what's going on because again, you don't live in a vacuum, things around you are happening all the time.
So get really, really clear on what it looks like and feels like to you. So that you have another thing, another value, another thing to help guide you in the pursuit of what you want. Also, when you're thinking about changes, I say that's a lot. Think about what you can add rather than take away, especially when it comes to your eating, because oftentimes diet culture is rooted in restriction.
What can we take away? What can we limit so that you can get smaller? We don't need to do that. So what can you add to your life?
There might be some things, yes, that fall away, naturally, as you realize, like, oh, this isn't aligned with my values anymore. This isn't aligned with how I want to live my life. Some things may fall away, that's pretty natural, happens all the time, and most likely something else will replace that or something else will come in there. So things can't fall away, and that's totally fine if you want to step away from something.
But when you're thinking about how to make changes, I always like to think about what can we add here that's supportive and helpful. What I mentioned a little bit earlier, zoom out and look at the bigger picture, because your health, like I mentioned, is way more about a bunch of things rather than just what you're eating and how you're moving. A lot of times, especially when I work with clients, the, I'm trying to eat, quote, perfect diet to make changes in my health. Oftentimes food, like actually what's on your plate, probably also movement as well, but I'm not a movement specialist, so I can't really speak to that too often.
But oftentimes what's on your plate is only one part of the equation. How you're eating that food can be really helpful. What's your stress like? Like if you're constantly eating in a stress state or living in a super stress state, that's not super helpful.
Maybe your movement is, you're moving too much, or maybe you're not moving enough, or maybe the movement is just fine. Maybe the movement is like, oh, maybe I need to lower the intensity. Oh, maybe I want to update the intensity. Maybe the choice is to not go to the gym right now and pursue a hard workout, because that's actually not what my body needs right now.
How's your caffeine consumption? Are you drinking four plus cups of coffee a day? Or like anything that's really caffeinated, and you're like constantly going, going, going, that's adding more stimulation to your body. That's adding more like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, let's go, let's go, let's go.
And your body also needs time to chill and down regulate, and just like, ah, rather than like, oh, no, no, no, no, I'm going. How's your sleep? Do you feel like you're getting enough sleep? Are you rested?
How's your hydration? It sounds so boring, I know, but drinking water is super helpful. It does help so many things in your body. How's your self-talk and your self-care?
Are you saying supportive things to yourself? Are you doing things for yourself to really deeply take care of you? Yeah, having clean clothes and brushing your teeth and taking your shower is some form of self-care, but what are the other deeper self-care things that you're doing for yourself? How's your joy and gratitude in your life?
Are you having fun? And I know that not every time in your life is gonna be fun, and that there are hard times for sure. And also speaking from personal experience, in the like, this is a period of a harder time in my life. There's always, always opportunities for even the smallest moments of joy and gratitude.
Even if that's super small of like, I saw a butterfly and it was really pretty, or there's a really nice flower that I saw today, or I had a really nice super brief exchange of someone, or I had a great phone conversation with someone, or I just laughed really, really hard in the midst of all of this shit. Joy and gratitude can happen at any moment in your life, even when there might be stuff that feels bigger and heavier and all consuming. It happened at all times, especially if you notice them and create some space for them. So often what I do with my clients and with myself is that I invite them to do a gratitude practice, and it doesn't have to be super big.
You've heard it mentioned on the show by guests before what are three things that are grateful for each day and why? And they can be really tiny. It could be like I saw the butterfly, it could be like there was a beautiful flower, or I got to talk to my friend on the phone, and I haven't got to talk to them in a while, or I got something in the mail, like something real in the mail that was not jumping out. They can be very small things that you're grateful for, and then they can be really big things too.
Like I'm grateful that I get to go on vacation tomorrow, or I've won something, or you know, those big things that we're all like super prime to know that we're grateful for, but they're also little things all the time. Enjoy, they're similar, but they're not quite the same, but joy, how much joy do you have in your life? Are you looking for that joy? Are you creating space for that joy?
Are you just letting yourself laugh and have fun? Easier environment, super supportive for you. Are you in a more pro-diac culture space about realizing it? What are the messages that are on TV shows that you watch, or radio shows that you listen to, or other podcasts, or what's on your Instagram feed, or your Facebook feed, if you have that?
Or the people around you? Maybe in your office, but I know it's a little bit harder to change, but what's the environment that you're in? Are you in there any way that you can make small adjustments? If it feels like it's online with you?
All of these things are connected in ways that diocococococ are definitely just not acknowledged, really. I mean, I think more people are talking about it because self-care is becoming trendy and also commodified. So people are trying to touch soluomontro shit in the quote pursuit of self-care, but it's actually deeply rooted in capitalism and diocoders self. So that's something that I also watch, and like, fuck.
But usually the idea of looking at the whole, and seeing like what is happening in the very picture is something that isn't really emphasized as much. It would be great to check in with yourself. Maybe you need to journal, maybe you don't, maybe just do an inventory in your head. How are those things going in your life?
Are there some that might need a little bit of extra support right now? Others some that are more immediate and pressing for you? I do have an episode about where to start with your health and your wellness, which I'll link in the show notes, that has some of these questions on. If you feel like, oh my God, yes, all of these things need help, how where do I start?
That episode is a great one to listen to. It's important to think about what is the things that you wanna move and just using a few of them, because this is not a race, this is not a workout that you need to PR or some kind of water, whatever. Like you don't need to speed through this. Honestly, it's really hard to speed through all of this stuff because as you move through all these things, you're gonna find more things that might need some attention or love, especially if you're stepping away from agriculture, things that will need to be unlearned.
And that stuff takes time. It really takes a lot of time and that's okay because you have your whole fucking life, which will be long and have so many good moments in it. You have a long time to figure this out. The whole idea that someone, which is really perpetuated in the self development world, this person was broken or deeply wounded or all that shit.
And then they have this revelation and they work with this person and they emerge so much better and magically fixed and cured, like that's a bullshit. That's a bullshit. Like yes, there can be moments in your life where they're hard and you work through them and you come out with some clarity, absolutely. But are you magically quote fixed forever?
I don't really think so. And I don't think that's something that bad. Because also what exactly does fixing mean? There's so many things to unlearn and so many things to figure out, well, what do I actually really want?
And the more that you look into all areas of your life, you might see that there are things that you might wanna adjust and change. If you wanna do that, that is up to you. Also, I wanna say that you do not have to do any of this alone. If you do wanna make health changes or any changes in your life, you could do this with another person, whether that's a friend or a family member, you can get support from people.
Because the thing that also, I feel like Diiculture and most systems of oppression perpetuate is this lone wolf bullshit. They have to go off and do this stuff alone and all of a sudden you emerge, somehow you find like all the bootstrap, interwisdom bullshit and you're gonna come out and be able to be a different and quote better person by pursuing this alone over there. No, the thing that is so important is community. The thing that supports you and that helps you and that can help you remind yourself of why you're doing this are the people around you.
The people around you that really love you and care for you. The idea that we have to do this alone is complete bullshit and really enforces systems of oppression that is like, no. So how can you do this work in community? You don't have to actually force people to do this work with you because that could really not be aligned with them.
Are there ways that people can support you in that way feel really weird, especially as people speaking for myself that or like, no, I can do it all alone. Let yourself be supported by others. And that support doesn't have to be like, oh my God, I'm gonna be super dependent on them and I'm just gonna rely on it. No, just like having someone check in with you and someone show that they care about you and that they support what you're doing, that they see you, that they hold space for you, having people to have your back as you navigate stuff and any time of your life, whether it's your health or other things is so helpful and just gives you that little bit of extra boost and encouragement and feeling connected with other people that really can make things so much easier and so much more helpful knowing that you have people that you're not alone.
Also in getting support, that could mean if that's just accessible for you and something that you want, it could mean hiring professional. It could be hiring nutritionist, if that's what you need, like myself, it could be hiring a trainer, it could be hiring a therapist or hiring another coach or person that has the expertise to help you in the things that you wanna change and adjust in your life. When you do that, if you do that, make sense to mention this in the show, I'm gonna mention here too, make sure that that person that you work with has similar values to you. And you can find this out by checking out their website and seeing the language that they use if they have been on any other podcasts or been on any video interviews that are on YouTube.
Look them up, do your research, if you feel like they're a fit or if you can't find any of those things, reach out to them and see if they do discovery calls or initial consultations, or maybe you pay for just one session to see how they are and you ask them a bunch of fucking questions. And then from there, you decide if that person is someone you wanna work with. I think the benefit about having someone to do your research on and someone that's more on the internet or someone that's more available in your life, like in person, you can talk to them and you can gather research and you can kind of see, especially if they're online and they post a lot or share a lot or have a podcast, you can kind of tell them where you listen to them or read, you can't tell where they are and who they are to see if they're aligned with your values or not. So that's another thing, there's no shame in having someone professionally to help you, if it's accessible to you, having a professional to give you that background, then you give you that support in another way that maybe your friends and family might not fully be able to do can be really helpful.
Also, it's important to check in with yourself as you make these changes, as you make these adjustments, if that's aligned with you, to see if they are still aligned with you because your values do adjust. Some words might change. If a time in your life changes, you might realize that your values adjust or that they mean something different or that they are all very different. Things change because you change.
So it's helpful to check in for yourself and see, do you still wanna do this? Is the motivation and the wise, are they the same? Or are they still something that's helpful for you and are the values still something that are deeply aligned or maybe did some adjust or update or change or have it for meaning? Always helpful to check in with yourself because you're not gonna be the same person forever, not a thing, you're not a robot.
And so it's really helpful to do that. So small steps for the show, journal out why you want this change and keep asking why until you feel like you are clear on what exactly the motivation is for wanting to make a change for a good, healthier lifestyle. Do you have values exercise to see what exactly your values are if you haven't already? Once you have both of those things, look at your wise and look at your values and see if they are aligned.
If they are not aligned or if they are aligned, from there you get to decide what do you wanna do? Do you wanna not pursue it? Do you wanna make adjustments and still pursue it? Or are you like cool, totally aligned, gonna keep moving?
You get to decide. If they do align, think about what you can add to your life. Look at the bigger picture of your health to see if there are any adjustments that might need to be taken in those areas as well. I recommend choosing two or three areas, probably not too many so that you can figure out like what's actually moving the needle and the change and focus on that for a set period of time more so that you can have like thinking about things like an experiment so you can have a data set to collect on and look at and all that stuff.
Reach up for support from friends, family and potentially professionals if that's supportive and accessible for you. Check in with yourself after that set period of time or just whenever you feel like it to see how are things going? Do you feel like these things are supportive for you? If not, adjust.
You always get to adjust. And my last one, which I say all the time, have so much kindness and compassion for yourself as you make these adjustments, as you look at these things, as you do all of the stuff. That's what makes life so much more helpful and supportive and just better when you really extend that kindness and compassion that you have for others back to yourself. If you realize that your changes that you wanted actually aren't what you want and you step away from it, give yourself a lot of love and compassion for that.
If you do feel like you are aligned and you want to make changes and maybe those changes are difficult or hard or new or you're like, fuck, why did I wait so long? Kind of think of passion. Or if you find that things are difficult. Or if things are great, like, you don't just need to give yourself kindness and compassion when things are hard or when things are not the way you want.
Kind of think of passion at all times. It's super fun and super helpful. And yeah, you might need a little bit more when things might feel sticky. I think it's not just an emergency tool.
It's a thing to have at all times in your life so that muscle gets really, really buff. So that was this week's show, getting clear on the why. I would love to know if you love the show, if anything resonated with you. And if you try any of this stuff, try the journaling and values and seeing what works, please let me know.
I would love to know how this worked for you. As always, if this show really resonates with you, please share it on Instagram. Please consider writing a review and giving this episode or maybe the show to someone that you really care about and see if that works for them. All right, until next week, you can do this once in a while, step at a time.