#6 Giving and taking it

Welcome to Men On Fire, a podcast about what it means to be a man.  Men on Fire Part Six and myself and Sam are here again. We've now released the first three episodes, haven't we? Yeah. And so I've been listening back to them to make sure I know what the hell I've been talking about for the last sort of episodes. But we haven't had five or six come out yet. No, four or five. Hang on. What? We're six? Yeah, this is six. Right. We've had three go out, we've got four or five in the bank, but neither of us can remember what they were about. No. So, you know, me, I struggle with names and my name, but genuinely so, just getting back to some people, really,  but here's a name. Sometimes it's Time Lord. Can you get Doctor Who to pause it or something? It does feel like time is very in short supply at the moment for a lot of people. A lot of my friends I talk to are really busy and it's really hard. I know I struggle. I've got my barbecue stuff, I've got my oil work and family very much keeping me busy and I feel I haven't got time, but made time. Sit down. If we really prioritize that hobby, if we put health and I need to prioritize that and I need to find a time for that activity, that gives me space, you often can do it. And then the other side of that is sometimes don't let. Your expectations.  Don't let perfection get in the way of progress. So for me, I've always loved exercise, it's an essential for me. I've never had a problem prioritizing it. You can ask my wife about that. But in recent years, having a son, I can't take that time away to go to the gym for an hour and be home, and now what I'll sometimes do at 20 minutes session instead of nothing. Whereas in the past I would have said, well, if I can't do an hour, there's no point. So it's finding those kind of ways to get enough of what you need but still fit it in with your life as well. I'm terrible like that. So I really need a new hobby. Since barbecue became work for me, I'm somebody who needs a hobby. So I've been talking with getting a bit of counselling, bit of support, and one of the questions that the guy asked me was, what about a new hobby? And I was really into sailing, like, as a student, and when I couldn't give it 110%, then I stopped doing it. And it's the same with rugby, it was the same with karate. So last year I started doing karate with my son and I had it in my head straight away that I'd be like Mr. Miyagi or Cry and. The pressures of family took time, took over so that I couldn't do it every week. And I quickly realized that I wasn't going to be Mr. Miyagi and I really wasn't going to be very good at it. Karate. And that kind of killed it to me, really. I'm somebody who likes to be the best at what I can be and then I'll give it the time. So barbecue I was able to give the time to. And, yeah, it's hard because you want to do something the best you can, a lot of us, and then putting the time to it. If you can't put the time to it, then it's hard to focus on it, I think. Yeah. Although that's just me, maybe. No, definitely. And that's obviously important. It's different for different people. I would wonder, though, if maybe an activity that requires you to be the best in it, to enjoy it is maybe you have just haven't found that activity that gives you that complete release and maybe like a release of the pressure of being good at it, even just want to see the improvements. And that's fine because you can't be Mr. Miyagi times all of us can get. Okay, podcasting. Let us know. Ed, what sort of things are you into? Well, he said he hasn't found anything, so that's the first journey, isn't it? And I guess what you could do is look at scheduling your week and see, what kind of hobby do I need? Because, again, something like sailing. You're going to need a lot of time to do that, I'd imagine. You can't just nip in a boat for 20 minutes and fart around, actually live on the water. We've had feedback from a not man, a woman. A lady. Are