628 - Why You Keep Getting in Your Own Way: How to Clear the Self-Sabotage Patterns Stalling Your Growth

Have you ever felt like you've done all the things-read the books, hired the coach, gone to therapy and yet somehow you still find yourself stuck in the same patterns?In this powerful conversation, Holly sits down with neuro-somatic practitioner and Identity X expert Riana Malia to explore what happens when personal growth reaches a point where traditional mindset work isn't enough. Together, they unpack how subconscious programming, stored emotions, and outdated identities can quietly shape our decisions, relationships, and business success.If you've ever wondered why you keep repeating the same cycles despite your best efforts, this episode offers a fresh perspective (and practical tools) to help you create lasting change.Tune in to hear:00:00:03 – Why doing more work isn't always the solution when you're feeling stuck00:04:57 – Understanding the conscious mind vs. the subconscious mind and how old patterns continue to run the show00:09:08 – The surprising signs that stored emotions and outdated identities may be holding you back00:12:11 – The restaurant menu analogy: why clarity about what you actually want changes everything00:16:04 – How negative thought patterns shape your reality and what neuroscience says about rewiring them00:18:12 – Rihanna's simple 72-hour "Away vs. Toward" exercise for shifting your focus and state in real time00:23:07 – The frequency metaphor: how changing your internal channel changes what you experience00:26:11 – Why high-achieving women self-sabotage right before breakthroughs and how to stop the cycle00:32:14 – The "mental pantry cleanout" exercise for releasing old stories and creating new momentum00:37:09 – Books, Maui, rest, and the importance of creating space for yourself outside of work00:41:04 – Where to connect with Riana and take the E.L.L.I.E. assessment for deeper self-discoveryCONNECT WITH RIANA:Website: https://www.rianamalia.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rianamalia/🔗 LINKS MENTIONED:🎯 Free Quiz: What's Standing Between You and Consistent Business Income? → hollymariehaynes.com/quiz👉 Download the Anti-Social Shift Private Podcast → hollymariehaynes.com/shift🌎 Website → www.hollymariehaynes.com📲 Instagram → @thehollymariehaynes🗨️ Chat with Holly → https://www.hollymariehaynes.com/chat