69: What's Been Running You: Healing the Patterns Underneath Your Patterns with Molly Rubesh

There is a version of you that you didn't choose. She was built quietly, over years, by everything you watched and absorbed and inherited. And at some point, she starts running your marriage, your relationships, and the way you move through life. In this episode, I sit down with Molly Rubesh, relationship and divorce coach and creator of The Modern Marriage Blueprint. Molly helps women heal what's been running them quietly so they can build marriages and lives that actually feel like theirs. Her work lives at the intersection of conflict, intimacy, and money. Three places where we are most ourselves and most defended at the same time. In this episode, we talk about: The inherited patterns we carry into marriage without ever examining them Why marriage is not supposed to be really, really hard (and what to do when it is) The rocks-on-a-tray framework for recognizing what is yours to hold and what isn't The difference between a fixable marriage and one that cannot be fixed with better communication Intimacy beyond the physical: intellectual, emotional, and spiritual connection and why they come first Financial independence as a non-negotiable, regardless of who earns the income What women get back when they finally do this work Key Takeaways / Reflection Prompts: What did you absorb from your first family about what marriage, conflict, and money look like? Are you still living from that? Look at your tray. What are you holding that was never yours to hold in the first place? Is your marriage hard because it is fundamentally broken, or because you have been carrying too much of it alone? Next Step: The In-Between WorkbookIf this conversation opened something up in you and you're sitting with a question you haven't had language for before, start here. The In-Between Workbook is a 33-page guided companion for the season when something has shifted and you're not sure what comes next. Five sections. One honest look at where you actually are. Get it here: https://dianeortega.gumroad.com/l/the-in-between Resources and Links: Connect with Molly: mollyrubesh.com Molly on Instagram: @Molly_Rubesh The Modern Marriage Blueprint (Molly's course): mollyrubesh.com More episodes of The Midwife Life: Listen Here Connect with Diane Website: ⁠themidwifelife.co⁠ Instagram: @‌the.midwife.life.co