7. Too Nice to Say No – People Pleasing, Boundaries, and the Fear of Rejection

Ever felt like you’re too nice to say no — nodding along with a smile while part of you inside is screaming, please, no?Yeah. Us too.In this episode of Too Much, Apparently, we (Carly and Alice -two therapists and recovering perfectionists with squishy brains) talk about people pleasing, boundaries, and the guilt that comes with trying to put yourself first.This time we talked about:🎙️ We’ve felt this thing too (and we still do): being the “good girl,” praised for niceness one minute and criticised the next, rescuing everyone else, or saying yes when we wanted to say no.👀 What it looks like in real life: agreeing before you’ve even thought, turning every no into a long explanation, keeping the peace with a smile while building resentment, adapting so much you lose sight of your own preferences, or ghosting at the last minute out of guilt.🧠 Why our brains do it: early praise and labels that stick, fawning as a trauma response, inconsistent parenting, and the pressure (especially on women) to be agreeable, helpful, and self-sacrificing.🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏻 The different ways it shows up: the Yes Machine, the Over Explainer, the Smiling Martyr, the Shapeshifter, and the Guilty Ghost.🧰 Coping mechanisms: noticing resentment as a boundary flag, trying out tiny no’s, experimenting with stronger boundaries and softening them later, and learning to see guilt as a sign you’re breaking an old rule rather than proof you’re a bad person.🌱 How to make peace with it: saying no doesn’t make you selfish — it creates space for a more honest yes.Thanks for listening 💛💜🩷🩵🧡💬 New episodes every Monday.🎧 Follow now to join the conversation.🧡 CONNECT WITH US🎙️ Podcast socials:→ Instagram: @toomuchapparently→ TikTok: @toomuchapparently→ YouTube: Too Much, Apparently→ Website: www.toomuchapparently.com👩‍💻 Carly Radford:→ Website: www.carlyradford.com→ Instagram: @the_sensitivity_therapist👩🏻‍💻 Alice Tew:→ Website: www.alicetew.com→ Instagram: @reparentingwithalice📩 Email us: [email protected]🗓️ New episodes every MondayThis is a podcast that says: bring your too-muchness… we’re here for it.Disclaimer: Just a quick note to say this podcast isn’t therapy, and it’s not a substitute for professional support. We’re here to share ideas and experiences, but if you’re struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support service near you.people pleasing podcast · saying no without guilt · boundaries podcast · fawning trauma response · perfectionism podcast · recovering good girl · therapy podcast · mental health podcast · Too Much Apparently