70: How to Discover Who You Are: An On-Air Session

Most people assume finding yourself is a spiritual or therapeutic journey. Dr. Lisle says it is something much more mechanical. Your identity is just the set of conditional relationships between you and the world, and the only way to map it is to go have experiences and watch your own nervous system react. In this live on-air session, a longtime listener named Dan brings Dr. Lisle a full picture of his life. He is 35, finishing a divorce, sharing custody of a young daughter, caught between traditional Korean-Christian family expectations and his own adventurous personality. Dr. Lisle walks him through the jukebox model of happiness, the Relationships Are Genetic framework, why you discover a partner rather than decide on one, and the uncomfortable truth about why your parents' advice on your mate choice is not actually aligned with your genetic interests. Key question covered: How do you find your identity and live according to it when your parents, your culture, and your past relationships all want you to be someone else? Beat Your Genes is co-hosted by evolutionary psychologist Dr. Doug Lisle, PhD and Dr. Nathan Gershfeld, DC. New episodes every other week. YouTube: youtube.com/@BeatYourGenes beatyourgenes.org Doug Lisle: esteemdynamics.com Nathan Gershfeld: fastingescape.com X: @BeatYourGenes Intro and outro: City of Happy Ones. Ferenc Hegedus. Licensed for use. Copyright Beat Your Genes Podcast