#74 - Superhero Pitch (Part 4)
from Penny Men Hosted by Penny Men
Saturday mornings were a lawless frontier! If it existed, it had a cartoon! Sneakers, cereal, California raisins — heck, even Chuck Norris had his own animated kids’ show, and the man barely needed dialogue in real life! This week, the Penny Men dig into that strange golden age and rediscover the forgotten relic known as Laser Tag Academy (1986), a series so committed to selling you a toy gun that it casually rewrote all of human history! Naturally, this leads the boys down a rabbit hole of “was that real or just a dream I had at 3 a.m. after too much chocolate milk?” Did MC Hammer really fight crime with magic shoes (Hammerman, yes)? Did Damon Wayans really make a cartoon about himself (Waynehead, yes)? Did Rubik the Amazing Cube actually exist (tragically, yes)? And why didn’t Hammer Pants get their own spin-off series where the pants themselves solved mysteries? From there, it’s only a short leap to building out a new contender in the Hookshot & Brickman universe: Laser Tag Guy! Is he: A mall cop dropout who insists the plastic blasters are “set to kill”? A time-traveling vigilante who blacks out every time the strobe lights kick in? A desperate birthday party entertainer who thinks Chuck E. Cheese is a worthy nemesis? Or all of the above, but with an expired Pizza Hut coupon as his calling card? By the end, one thing is clear: the line between real Saturday morning nostalgia and collective hallucination is extremely thin, and the Penny Men are determined to cross it, laser vests glowing in the dark!
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