8. Too Good at Pretending to be Fine - The Cost of Saying “I’m Okay” When You’re Not

Ever felt like you’re too messy, too much, or too needy to admit you’re struggling? Yeah. Us too.In this episode of Too Much, Apparently, we (Carly and Alice — two therapists and recovering perfectionists with squishy brains) get real about why we’ve become so good at pretending to be fine, what it costs us, and how hard it can be to drop the “I’m okay” mask.We unpack our own resistance, spiral in real-time, and explore what it’s like to hide behind “I’m fine” when the truth feels too risky, too heavy, or too much for others.This time we talked about:🎙️ We’ve felt this thing too (and we still do): smiling through chaos, being called “so strong,” masking pain with busyness 👀 What it looks like in real life: saying “not too bad” while exhausted, minimising chronic illness, being the eldest daughter / strong friend 🧠 Why our brains do it: cultural conditioning (keep calm & carry on), family messages, and fear of being “too much” 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏻 The different ways it shows up: people-pleasing, pushing through pain, avoiding vulnerability, testing who “really cares” 🧰 Coping mechanisms: humour, selective honesty, practicing with safe people, challenging black-and-white thinking 🌱 How to make peace with it: start small — honesty is risky, but it’s also how deeper connection beginsThanks for listening           💛💜🩷🩵🧡💬 New episodes every Monday.🎧 Follow now to join the conversation.🧡 CONNECT WITH US 🎙️ Podcast socials: → Instagram: @toomuchapparently → TikTok: @toomuchapparently → YouTube: Too Much, Apparently → Website: www.toomuchapparently.com👩‍💻 Carly Radford: → Website: www.carlyradford.com → Instagram: @the_sensitivity_therapist👩🏻‍💻 Alice Tew: → Website: www.alicetew.com → Instagram: @reparentingwithalice📩 Email us: [email protected] 🗓️ New episodes every MondayThis is a podcast that says: bring your too-muchness… we’re here for it.Disclaimer: Just a quick note to say this podcast isn’t therapy, and it’s not a substitute for professional support. We’re here to share ideas and experiences, but if you’re struggling, please reach out to a mental health professional or a support service near you.—--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------pretending to be fine podcast, masking emotions podcast, people pleasing podcast, eldest daughter pressure podcast, keep calm and carry on culture, emotional suppression podcast, perfectionism podcast, chronic illness mental health podcast, overthinking podcast, sensitivity podcast, therapy podcast, anxiety podcast, neurodivergent podcast, ADHD podcast, autism podcast, Too Much Apparently podcast