89: How to date without anxiously ATTACHING too FAST (4 Stages of Dating) episode artwork

EPISODE · Oct 9, 2025 · 21 MIN

89: How to date without anxiously ATTACHING too FAST (4 Stages of Dating)

from The Anxious To Secure PODCAST · host Jula - The Anxious To Secure Coach

ow to Stop OVERTHINKING🚫 🌀Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)   Attachment Style QUIZ : Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz   Do you ever meet someone new and suddenly feel like he’s the one just because he’s nice, attractive, or gives you a few compliments? 🖤✨ If you’ve noticed yourself rushing into relationships like this, it’s not a coincidence.. it’s a sign of anxious attachment. In this episode, I’m breaking down why your nervous system craves instant closeness, why you attach too fast, and how that speed can leave you anxious, overthinking, and ignoring red flags. We’ll talk about the real difference between healthy interest and anxious over-investment, plus the biggest dating mistakes anxiously attached people make (texting too much, oversharing, canceling plans, imagining a future too soon). ✨ Ready to learn the secret behind anxiously attaching too fast, the hidden consequences in dating vs. how securely attached people actually date? This insight can shift how you see yourself, your patterns, and the kind of love you’re building. You’ll also learn how to slow down dating without losing attraction, how to build self-trust and emotional safety, and how to notice if someone is actually secure.. or just giving you temporary reassurance. If you’ve ever asked yourself: Why do I fall too fast in relationships? Am I attached to the person, or just the comfort they give me? How do I stop overthinking texts and rushing for labels? …this episode is for you. Tune in now to discover how dating at a steady, grounded pace helps you protect your energy, feel secure, and finally choose someone for who they are: not just the safety they represent. Welcome to the Anxious-to-Secure Podcast with, me - Jula   CHAPTERS: 00:00 Understanding Anxious Attachment in Dating 02:15 What Anxious Attachment Looks Like 03:23 Mistakes That Happen When You Attach Too Fast in Dating 07:19 How does Securely Dating + Slow Dating look like? 08:22 How to date slowly when you first meet (Stage 01) 10:02 How to date slowly in the TALKING Phase of dating (Phase 02) 14:10 How to date slowly when you are officially DATING (Stage 03) 16:38 How to date slowly when you're EXCLUSIVE (Stage 04) 19:12 Tools to Stay Grounded During the Dating Stages 20:13 Recap and Final Thoughts on Healthy Dating   Attachment Style QUIZ : Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz   ✅ The Anxious TO Secure CHECKLIST  https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/anxioustosecurechecklist   OFFERS: 🖤📱 ON SALE: "Stop Obsessing Over Texts in 21 Days or Less"  https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety     Want more support? ➞ Monthly Text + Talk Support 📲 🖤 (daily coaching, check-ins + reassurance and becoming secure, text by text, commitment free support, cancel any month) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk   ➞ Monthly Coaching Calls 📞🖤 (2x calls a month or unlimited calls + text support to help you become secure) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/oneononecoachingsubscription   DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

ow to Stop OVERTHINKING🚫 🌀Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)   Attachment Style QUIZ : Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz   Do you ever meet someone new and suddenly feel like he’s the one just because he’s nice, attractive, or gives you a few compliments? 🖤✨ If you’ve noticed yourself rushing into relationships like this, it’s not a coincidence.. it’s a sign of anxious attachment. In this episode, I’m breaking down why your nervous system craves instant closeness, why you attach too fast, and how that speed can leave you anxious, overthinking, and ignoring red flags. We’ll talk about the real difference between healthy interest and anxious over-investment, plus the biggest dating mistakes anxiously attached people make (texting too much, oversharing, canceling plans, imagining a future too soon). ✨ Ready to learn the secret behind anxiously attaching too fast, the hidden consequences in dating vs. how securely attached people actually date? This insight can shift how you see yourself, your patterns, and the kind of love you’re building. You’ll also learn how to slow down dating without losing attraction, how to build self-trust and emotional safety, and how to notice if someone is actually secure.. or just giving you temporary reassurance. If you’ve ever asked yourself: Why do I fall too fast in relationships? Am I attached to the person, or just the comfort they give me? How do I stop overthinking texts and rushing for labels? …this episode is for you. Tune in now to discover how dating at a steady, grounded pace helps you protect your energy, feel secure, and finally choose someone for who they are: not just the safety they represent. Welcome to the Anxious-to-Secure Podcast with, me - Jula   CHAPTERS: 00:00 Understanding Anxious Attachment in Dating02:15 What Anxious Attachment Looks Like03:23 Mistakes That Happen When You Attach Too Fast in Dating07:19 How does Securely Dating + Slow Dating look like?08:22 How to date slowly when you first meet (Stage 01)10:02 How to date slowly in the TALKING Phase of dating (Phase 02)14:10 How to date slowly when you are officially DATING (Stage 03)16:38 How to date slowly when you're EXCLUSIVE (Stage 04)19:12 Tools to Stay Grounded During the Dating Stages20:13 Recap and Final Thoughts on Healthy Dating   Attachment Style QUIZ : Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz   ✅ The Anxious TO Secure CHECKLIST  https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/anxioustosecurechecklist   OFFERS: 🖤📱 ON SALE: "Stop Obsessing Over Texts in 21 Days or Less"  https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textanxiety     Want more support? ➞ Monthly Text + Talk Support 📲 🖤 (daily coaching, check-ins + reassurance and becoming secure, text by text, commitment free support, cancel any month) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/textandtalk   ➞ Monthly Coaching Calls 📞🖤 (2x calls a month or unlimited calls + text support to help you become secure) https://www.the-marriage-coach.com/oneononecoachingsubscription   DISCLAIMER: I'm not a therapist or doctor. This content is for informational and entertainment purposes only. It's not intended to diagnose, treat, or heal any mental health conditions. This is not meant for situations involving abusive relationships of any kind. Always seek professional advice for personal health concerns.   Remember: Change in your relationship starts with YOU, thought by thought and action by action.

NOW PLAYING

89: How to date without anxiously ATTACHING too FAST (4 Stages of Dating)

0:00 21:49

No transcript for this episode yet

We transcribe on demand. Request one and we'll notify you when it's ready — usually under 10 minutes.

Big Old Life: Heather Blackbird interviews people on planet earth. Heather Blackbird loves asking questions. This podcast is a learning experience. Join me, Heather Blackbird, as I talk to people about their lives. Frequency of new episodes is a little all over the place and I'm learning as I go. Big Old Life is a small way of talking about the vastness of life, one person at a time. If you are reading this or found this podcast it's probably because someone you know gave you a link to it. :) Explicit Tales Of A Superstar DJ The Insomniac Spun seemingly out of nowhere from her complacent life in the corporate world, turned seemingly overnight from 16-Hour shift work and into the life of a literally starving artist and working musician, The Protagonist navigates her supposed rise to fame and superstardom on a journey through spiritual awakening, coming-of-age, and intimate self-realization--guided by an omnipresent force and equipped with the power of love, magic, and music. {Enter The Multiverse.} [The Festival Project] The Festival Project, Inc.™ is a multidimensional multimedia platform which encompasses exploratory and artistic social personifications and expressions on cosmic theory, spirituality, growth, health & wellness, philosophy and theoretic dynamics in entertainment such as music, design, film, television, radio, dance and festival culture, art, fashion, literature, and science. The Festival Project™ and its subsidiary Non-Profit, The Collective Complex © aims to challenge modern artistic and philosop Explicit Bitcoin Is Dead Trey Carson Welcome to Bitcoin is Dead, the ultimate Bitcoin variety show where host Trey takes you on a journey through the ever-evolving world of Bitcoin. Each episode brings new personalities, fascinating locations, and insightful conversations with politicians, educators, and innovators shaping the future of Bitcoin. Whether you're a seasoned Bitcoiner or just starting your journey, tune in for thought-provoking discussions, unique perspectives, and a deep dive into the ideas and people driving the Bitcoin revolution. Explicit The Sacred +Profane Podcast nephtaragrace The Sacred + Profane Podcast is a provocative conversation dedicated to cementing a better future for all. We specialize in unpacking the nuances of what is considered sacred and profane, particularly focusing on sex, death, and all that pertains to the circle of life. Our aim in focusing on such ”taboo” subject matter is to demystify what is unconscious, bring to light what has been known for centuries as ”the occult,” and empower the rapid transformation that is occurring on the Planet. Explicit

Frequently Asked Questions

How long is this episode of The Anxious To Secure PODCAST?

This episode is 21 minutes long.

When was this The Anxious To Secure PODCAST episode published?

This episode was published on October 9, 2025.

What is this episode about?

ow to Stop OVERTHINKING🚫 🌀Your Relationship in 4 Steps (With Your Avoidant Partner)   Attachment Style QUIZ : Take the 3-min quiz to be 100% sure you're Anxiously Attached:  https://themarriagecoach.outgrow.us/attachmentstyle3mquiz   Do you ever...

Is there a transcript available for this episode?

Yes, a full transcript is available for this episode. You can read the complete transcript on the episode page.

Can I download this The Anxious To Secure PODCAST episode?

Yes, you can download this episode by clicking the download button on the episode player, or subscribe to the podcast in your preferred podcast app for automatic downloads.
URL copied to clipboard!