89 | You Can't Outwork Your Way Into Safety

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!This week, Monique shares one of her most personal episodes yet, offering an honest look at a season marked by anxiety, overwhelm, and the constant pressure to protect the people she loves. As worries about emergencies, business growth, social media, and motherhood began pulling her in every direction, she realized she had been sacrificing her own peace in an attempt to control the uncontrollable.Through deeply personal stories, Monique reflects on the hidden cost of living in a constant state of future-focused worry and the breakthrough conversations that helped her recognize the difference between productive preparation and anxiety-driven control. She shares how chasing safety was actually pulling her further away from the presence, connection, and peace she was longing for.If you've ever felt emotionally stretched too thin or found yourself carrying the weight of every possible "what if," this episode offers an honest reminder that peace isn't found by controlling more. It's cultivated by coming back to the present.GEMS DROPPED“I ​have ​been ​desperately ​seeking ​control and ​it ​has ​been ​under the ​delusion ​​that ​the ​more ​we ​do, the harder we ​push, ​if ​we ​can ​break ​off ​more ​pieces ​of ​ourself ​to ​tackle ​more ​fires ​and ​to ​run ​faster, ​that ​this ​will ​increase ​our ​control. ​And ​the ​thing ​that ​I ​was ​seeking ​was ​safety. And felt ​like the ​more ​I ​do ​these ​things, ​eventually ​I'll ​feel ​more ​safe.. ​And ​it ​couldn't ​be ​further ​from ​the ​truth.”“What ​I ​was ​losing ​in ​this ​constant ​pursuit ​of ​trying ​to ​control ​things ​and ​seeking ​safety ​was ​my ​peace ​and connection. ​You ​can't ​be ​present ​if ​you're ​always ​running ​out ​into ​the ​future.”“You ​are ​not ​alone, ​you ​are ​not ​broken,, ​you ​are ​not ​the ​only ​one. ​Because ​I ​know ​that's ​the ​thing ​that ​I ​can ​feel ​like, ​really ​lost and ​sometimes ​I'm ​like, ​it ​seems ​like ​everybody ​else ​is ​coping ​so ​well. ​Girl, ​everybody ​else ​is ​not ​coping ​so ​well. People ​who ​are ​interested ​in ​dysfunction, ​who ​have ​been ​operating ​out ​of ​dysfunction, ​they're ​going ​to ​be ​operating ​fine. But ​if ​that ​is ​not ​who ​you ​are ​at ​your ​core, ​you are not someone ​who ​​seeks ​dysfunction, ​who ​is ​interested ​in ​chaos, ​then ​you ​don't ​have ​to ​be ​fine. ​And ​you ​are ​definitely ​not ​alone. ​You ​are ​definitely ​not ​alone.”“So ​my ​work ​right ​now ​is ​opening ​up ​more ​capacity ​to ​stay ​present ​to ​my ​process, ​to ​be ​in ​the ​process ​of ​things ​​and ​to ​invite ​in ​more ​help.”“There's ​no ​arrival ​point ​for ​anything ​in ​life, ​including ​safety. ​You ​never ​get ​to ​a ​point ​where ​you're ​like, ​I ​am ​safe. ​​Not ​permanently. ​ ​That ​is ​an ​active ​​process ​of ​cultivating ​safety ​and ​​seeking ​out ​things ​that ​are healthy ​and ​nourishing such as relationships, ​spaces, ​work, ​communities.”STAY IN TOUCHCome and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].