#94 - David Jay / Exploring asexuality: intimacy, relationships and community

On today’s episode, Toshi had a conversation with David Jay, who is the founder of the Asexual Visibility and Education network, which is the world’s largest online asexual community. Together, they had a conversation about the experience of being asexual and the expectations that society has around sexuality, as well as how David has redefined relationships and intimacy as an asexual person. They also discussed three-parent families and the importance of building a community of care, and finished the conversation talking about why conflict is actually a really good thing.Find AVEN (Asexuality Visibility and Education Network) here: https://www.asexuality.org/en/ Find David's book, Relationality: How Moving from Transactional to Transformational Relationships Can Reshape Our Lonely World, here: https://amzn.asia/d/f7Z2uVq  Timestamps:   00:00 – Intro 01:26 – What does it mean to be asexual, or ‘ace’?  03:26 – What is compulsory sexuality? 04:39 – David’s experience as a young ace person 06:32 – How society has different sexual expectations for different bodies 08:15 – The impact of asexuality on how David sees relationships and intimacy 11:12 – The benefits of having intentional friendships 13:33 – Why you should be thinking about creating a community of care 16:35 – What it’s like to be in a three-parent family 19:44 – Two things you can learn from this podcast 23:01 – Advice if you want to be more intentional in your friendships 24:24 – Why being asexual is so liberating 26:39 – What David would have wanted his younger self to know 28:20 – How the ace community has changed over time  33:04 – Why relationships with others are so important 37:19 – Why conflict is a really good thing 39:34 – David’s message to ace listeners 40:43 – Conclusion -----------------  Check out our books, 'How to talk with your kids about porn' and 'The Organ Education Forgot', available at https://www.sexinspace.com/books to download or buy.  Follow us here: https://www.instagram.com/sexinspacedotcom https://www.tiktok.com/@sexinspacedotcom https://www.facebook.com/sexinspacedotcom https://www.youtube.com/@sexinspace For more info, check out our website at: https://www.sexinspace.com/  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.