97. Are You One Of The People You Try To Please (Part 2 of 2), with Lori Montry

People pleasing is a habit that affects so many of us in midlife, often masquerading as kindness or duty. While we all want to care for our loved ones, it becomes a problem when it constantly drains our energy, causes stress, and negatively impacts our nervous system. In this episode, which is part two of our two-week focus on the topic, I welcome Lori Montry. Lori is an author, a somatic practitioner, an educator, and the founder of the You're Not the Problem movement. We dive deep into why people pleasing is actually a nervous system adaptation designed for safety, why simply trying to force boundaries usually backfires, and how midlife provides the perfect opportunity to finally step into the starring role of your own life. What You’ll Learn:The Safety Strategy: Why people pleasing isn't a character defect, but rather an evolutionary adaptation wired into our DNA to keep us safe and connected. Alignment vs. Capacity: How to evaluate your "yeses" by asking yourself not only if a choice aligns with your values, but if you actually have the energetic capacity for it. The Midlife Shift: How the decline of estrogen and the natural transitions of our 40s and 50s give us the internal push to explore what we truly want in our next phase of life. Links & Resources:Sponsor: Get 10% off Vitamin G with code MINDYOURMIDLIFE Lori's Website & Free Resources: lorimontry.com Lori's book: You're Not the ProblemListen to Part 1: Episode 96 Cheryl's Midlife Recharge: cherylpfischer.com/rechargeEpisode Chapters: 00:00:00 - Intro To People Pleasing00:01:11 - Sponsor Vitamin G00:01:47 - Part Two Focus And Guest00:04:16 - Lori’s Pivot From Law00:09:42 - What People Pleasing Really Means00:12:39 - When Pleasing Becomes A Safety Plan00:16:13 - Why You Cannot Just Stop00:20:01 - Stop Being A Supporting Character00:21:31 - Midlife Pressures And Hormone Shifts00:23:34 - Change Without Fighting Yourself00:27:25 - Values Versus Capacity In Real Life00:31:03 - Weekly Review And Body Wisdom00:32:47 - Somatics And Where To Find Lori00:39:07 - Closing Thoughts And Intuition ReminderWhy This Episode Matters By understanding that your people-pleasing habits were originally designed to protect you, you can stop fighting yourself and start gently guiding your nervous system toward true authenticity. It’s time to stop being a supporting character and become the main character in your own life. Take a little bit better care of yourself in midlife.Support the show🌸 Liked this episode? Share it with fellow Gen X women navigating hormone balance, an empty nest, and/or self-confidence!🫶 Love this show? Leave a review to help more women over 50 find us.💡Want menopause advice, mindset shifts, or support with midlife transformation?Find out more about the Midlife Recharge at cherylpfischer.com/rechargeLet’s talk health after 50, self-talk, and redefining aging for women — without the “midlife crisis” narrative. Every week I'm adding new success strategies for midlife women.Connect with Cheryl: Instagram | LinkedIn | Website---------------💡If you are a brand, author, or business wanting to reach an audience of women in their 40s and 50s who are focused on health, success, and taking care of themselves and others well in this stage of life, consider sponsoring Mind Your Midlife podcast.  More information here.