A Half Life

All my life--or should I say--ever since I've been aware of myself in comparison to others, I've lived in shadow. My peers seemed as though they were in a perpetual stupor or trance. I was the only person "looking," or able to look. That's a biased perspective, of course. I wanted to join them so badly. I wanted to be free in expression and dancing and social norms. I wanted it and feared it so. I still fear it, and I still want it. Ever watching from the shadows, I live a half life in limbo.