A Trauma-Informed Understanding of Forgiveness and Letting Go

There can be a lot of talk around forgiveness in the self-help space, but what does it actually mean to forgive? Forgiveness is not just a mindset shift or something we can “think” our way into—it is a somatic process that requires addressing the nervous system and accessing our healthy aggression. Using the latest neuroscience research, Sarah explains how unresolved trauma gets stored in our bodies until we are able to “complete the incomplete experience” or access the appropriate response to what occurred. If you’ve struggled to let go and move forward in life, this episode will give you a step-by-step guide to somatically resolve these wounds, so that you can find freedom from the past and release feelings of shame and resentment.Episode Highlights00:00 Intro00:46 Time Does Not Heal All  04:36 We Must First Process What Occurred08:01 What is Healthy Aggression?11:20 What is Unhealthy Aggression?12:36 Building Your Capacity for Healthy Aggression15:56 Practical Applications for Somatic Forgiveness 21:31 Accessing Your Unmet Needs24:09 Struggling to Move On After a Betrayal27:21 Healing Shame and Anger from Childhood Trauma32:48 How to Overcome Parental Guilt42:07 Spiritual Bypassing Around Forgiveness RSVP to Sarah’s FREE live training:Ready for tangible somatic tools? Take this work to the next level when you join the Nervous System Starter Kit — a FREE 75-minute live training to help you get into the driver’s seat of your experience and step toward your desires.https://bit.ly/sp-nssk Connect with Sarah on:Email Community - https://bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletterInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/Submit a Question: https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcastImportant Keywords:Polyvagal Theory - This theory, developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, explains how the autonomic nervous system regulates our responses to stress, danger, and safety. It highlights the role of the vagus nerve in shifting between survival states (fight, flight, freeze, and shut down) and social engagement, which is crucial for emotional healing.Healthy Aggression - A term coined by Peter Levine, this is our lifeforce energy, which is needed to set boundaries, protect oneself, and assert personal needs. It’s also the energy that allows us to experience full aliveness, connection, wonder, and awe. When suppressed, it can lead to unresolved anger, resentment, and even physical symptoms, but when expressed appropriately, it helps complete past emotional responses.Trauma - Trauma is the overwhelm of activation (energy) experienced in our bodies, in the face of helplessness. If we do not have the conditions necessary for trauma to process through our bodies, it becomes stuck and stored, leaving lasting emotional, physical or psychological imprints. It disrupts the nervous system causing chronic dysregulation, disconnection and/or hypervigilance.Somatic Healing - Somatic healing focuses on addressing trauma and stress stored in the body, rather than just the mind. It involves practices that help release trapped activation/energy, regulate the nervous system and complete the incomplete response to trauma of the past, and reconnect with the physical self. Techniques like movement, touch, and breathwork are commonly used to support this healing process.Titration of Trauma - This refers to the body's natural process of releasing stored energy from past trauma or stress. It can happen through movement, sound, breathwork, or other somatic practices that allow the body to complete an unfinished emotional cycle and pendulate through stress responses.