Advice for Grieving Military Losses

Dr. Jan Canty is a psychologist of about 40 years. In 1985, her spouse was murdered and she has since made it her life's mission to help other homicide survivors. In this episode, we discuss combat deaths and some of the things to do and not to do when facing those situations. Links & Resources JanCantyPhD.com Jan Canty on YouTube Domino Effect of Murder Podcast A Life Divided: A psychologist's memoir about the double life and murder of her husband - and her road to recovery Transcript Scott DeLuzio    00:00:00    Thanks for tuning into the Drive On Podcast where we're focused on giving hope and strength to the entire military community, whether you're a veteran, active duty, guard, reserve, or family member, this podcast we'll share inspirational stories and resources that are useful to you. I'm your host, Scott DeLuzio. And now let's get on with the show. Hey everybody. Welcome back to the Drive On Podcast. Today, my guest is Dr. Jan Canty. Dr. Canty is a psychologist of about 40 years, and in 1985, her spouse was murdered and she has since made it her life mission to help other homicide survivors and having her on the podcast today. Not necessarily to talk directly about homicide, but we deal with all sorts of different kinds of deaths, combat death, and training accidents in the military community. I'm having her come on to talk about some of the unique aspects of those types of death, and really help us try to process those things in our own lives, with the people that we know. So welcome to the show.   Dr. Jan Canty    00:01:13    Well thank you for having me Scott DeLuzio     00:01:14. I'm glad you're here. So why don't you tell us a little bit about yourself and your background?   Dr. Jan Canty   00:01:21    Well, I was born, raised, educated, and widowed in Detroit. I was married to a man 11 years ago. I was in training to be a psychologist. He was a psychologist when he failed to come home one night from work and long story short within 10 days, they'd found his body. He had been kidnapped, I mean, not kidnapped. He had been cornered and beaten to death with a baseball bat and killed. And then they, the man who killed him, John Fry, dismembered him and took him up to Northern Michigan and buried him in a shallow grave. I think that what brought it all to light was who helped with the barrel. He did not participate in the killing, but he held the cover-up. Had he not come forward. I don't know that they would've ever figured it out, but he did. And they got caught and they both got sentenced.   Dr. Jan Canty    00:02:16    There were two people involved and I had no knowledge of what had happened. So I sat across from inspector Gil Hill, who, by the way, incidentally was just coming off the set of Eddie Murphy's Beverly Hills cop one. He was Inspector Todd. And he's just like that guy in real life. Let me tell you a very man of very few words, kind of intense. And he basically said,  your husband's dead and we need you to go to the Morgue, identify his identifiable body parts. And I had a remarkable detective go with me, who prepped me on the way as best she could. And literally stood by my side, through the identification process. She did not have to do that. That was not part of her duties, but she did it. And she was there at the prelim exam. I did not go to the trial.