Aisyah Rafaee - 2x Olympic Rower on Comebacks, Mental Strength & Redefining High Performance in Your 30s

In this episode of the Tough Girl Podcast, we're joined by Aisyah Rafaee – a two-time Olympic rower from Singapore who competed at the Rio 2016 and Paris 2024 Olympic Games in the single scull. After taking an eight-year break from the sport, Aisyah made the bold decision to return—qualifying for Paris 2024 as one of the oldest athletes in the field and redefining what it means to be a high-performing athlete in your 30s. Originally from Singapore and now based in Boston, USA, Aisyah grew up with four brothers and discovered rowing after being scouted during an indoor competition at school. With limited rowing culture and opportunities in Singapore, she carved her own path—training overseas in Sydney, qualifying through a fiercely competitive Asian selection process, and representing Singapore on the world stage. But her journey hasn't been linear. From struggling with pressure at her first Olympics to working with mental skills coach Hansen Bay, from stepping away from elite sport to rediscovering her love for movement, from fracturing her ribs a month before Paris to qualifying with just six months to go—this is a powerful conversation about identity, resilience, vulnerability, and growth. Now working as a HYDROW Athlete and Mental Performance Coach with 3HP Athlete Coaching, Aisyah shares insights on: Building confidence and resilience Letting go of expectations Separating identity from performance The realities of returning to elite sport after time away Training and mindset during pregnancy Why rowing is a lifelong sport Her philosophy of the 3Hs: Happy, Healthy & High Performing This episode is about trusting your timing, embracing new chapters, and asking yourself: Is this smart for me? Aisyah's story is proof that it's never "too late" to chase a dream — and that high performance can evolve with you. ***  New episodes of the Tough Girl Podcast drop every Tuesday at 7 AM (UK time)! Make sure to subscribe so you never miss the inspiring journeys and incredible stories of tough women pushing boundaries.  Do you want to support the Tough Girl Mission to increase the amount of female role models in the media in the world of adventure and physical challenges? Support via Patreon! Join me in making a difference by signing up here: www.patreon.com/toughgirlpodcast.  Your support makes a difference.  Thank you x *** Show notes Who is Aisyah Being based in Boston, USA Originally from Singapore  Working as a HYDROW Athlete  Working as a Mental Performance Coach 3HP Athlete Coaching  2x Olympic rower in the single sculll Competing at the 2016 and 2024 Olympics  Learning to live a normal life outside of sports  Growing up in Singapore with 4 brothers 3 older brothers and 1 younger brother Being sporty and learning to be competitive  Living a simple life and being raised by her mum after her parents got divorced Not knowing where her mindset comes from Wanting to be the best version of herself  Not being surrounded by high performance individuals  Starting rowing, Singapore not having much of a rowing culture  Getting scouted at her secondary school during an indoor rowing competition  Singapore Rowing Association The importance of hight in rowing  5'8 (173cm)and being tall for an Asian Woman  Learning how to row on land with the ergo  The challenges and continuing to show u to training  Not enjoying it at first Getting out on the water and spending more time in the water than on the water The lack of opportunities in Singapore Why the Olympics was not on her radar  Wanting to be the best at it and wanting to represent Singapore  Team sport  (Netball) V individual endeavours (Rower) The South East Asia Games Rowing in a single scull Winning gold in 2013 and beating a 2x Olympian  Quitting her job and training full time in Australian  When the seed got planted about going to the Olympics Deciding to go and train over in Sydney, Australia  Building confidence and winning competitions  Qualifying for the 2016 Olympics - the Asian Qualification Criteria for that cycle  16 countries competing for 7 spots Dealing with the pressure of going to the Olympics and being able to perform at the highest level  The weight of expectation and not being able to perform  Working with the mental skills coach Hansen Bay The power of letting go of expectations, facing the fear, how losing can tie into identity, building confidence and resilience The practical side of mental preparation  Communication and trust  Learning how to be vulnerable  Why it took more than 1 session  Taking an 8 year gap and what happened  Trying to retire from sports and wanting to focus on her career 2018 and deciding to do some soul searching and heading to the USA to work as a rowing coach in Boston Meeting her current husband Getting into marathon running and thinking about trying out for the Paris Olympics 2023 - visiting Paris Thinking she was too old to row in the Olympics in her 30s Having 6 months to qualify for the Paris Olympics  Qualifying in April 2024 and getting the last spot available  The Paris Olympics and what it was like Fracturing her ribs a month before the games Having her family there to support her  Handing the pressure the 2nd time around Motivation during training Keeping her eye on the prize Moving her body Being in a different chapter in her life Being a HYROW Athlete and how it works Advice for women who want to get into rowing Why it's a lifelong sport How to connect and follow along with Ariesyah 3Hs - Happy, Healthy and High Performing  Training for a marathon in 2026 and finding out she's pregnant! Fitness and health during pregnancy Top tips and advice to listen to your body Is this smart for me? Think of the bigger picture    Social Media Website: 3hpathlete.com  Instagram:  @ariesyah @3hpathlete