Anne

Anne (not her real name) became a mother through an unconventional arrangement with her neighbours. It was similar to surrogacy - and similar to adoption. The team didn't know anything about surrogacy laws and processes before the baby was on the way. Unfortunately, as they came to discover, the child protection system and the legal system had some different ideas about the arrangement. It was almost two years after the birth that the legal process was finalised, granting Anne parental responsibility for her daughter. Anne and I shared this story in the hope that we could educate intended parents and surrogates about the consequences of entering 'off-grid' arrangements, and the importance of following the processes so as to get the Parentage Order for the child. Anne was granted a court order, but it was not a Parentage Order, it was a Parenting Order. And the order she was granted came at great legal expense and a huge emotional toll for her and the birth parents.