Anxiety and Drinking - Casey Joins up the Dots

Tribe Sober - inspiring an alcohol-free life! My guest this week is Casey McGuire Davidson who is from Seattle in the US. Like me Casey was caught in the corporate workhard/playhard culture as well as the mommyjuice trend…using alcohol to cope with stress and anxiety and becoming  more dependent over the years… But somehow we both found our way out of that trap and now we are finding joy in helping people to do the same In this Episode Casey realised in her 20’s that she had no “off” switch – I think that’s true of many of us yet we delude ourselves that we don’t have a problem because we can go for days without drinking – but if you do finding yourself drinking far too much after that first glass then you probably need to make some changes Casey’s first glimpse into the trouble that alcohol can cause came when she read “A love story” by Caroline Knapp – if you are worried about your drinking then reading some QuitLit is a great way to start – if you want a reading list then just email me [email protected] Casey went to doctors and therapists about her anxiety and insomnia – most of which was caused by alcohol but she was in denial about her drinking and just didn’t CONNECT THE DOTS Like many of us Casey started making rules – in fact Casey and I had a whole conversation about the rules we used to make that you can find on her podcast (Hello Someday – episode 77 )  The reason we make these rules of course is that we are still trying to moderate as we can’t imagine our life without it – having to give up completely is our worst nightmare – whereas with hindsight both Casey and myself can say that giving up completely was the best thing we ever did! Casey managed a year of sobriety (partly due to her pregnancy) but then was soon back to her bottle a night habit. The second time she gave up she understood so much more – she had joined up the dots and realized that alcohol was the cause of her anxiety and insomnia. She hired a Sober Coach and checked in with her every single day – because she was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Many of us get to this stage eventually – at our workshops I often hear people say “I’m done – I just can’t do this anymore” – and those people usually succeed and go on to thrive in their sobriety We talked about the strong women we work with – and how many of us managed to hold it all together through the drinking years. Once we are liberated from the shackles of alcohol addiction there is no stopping us and we go on to achieve great things.  Sobriety is a Superpower I always say!  We talked about mindshift – Casey has gone from seeing alcohol as a “reward” to seeing it as a “maladaptive coping strategy” – alcohol is NOT self care – how on earth did the liquor industry convince us that a “glass of wine at the end of the day” was an act of self care when for many of us it’s the opposite! I loved Caseys description of her breakthrough moment – how on Day 16 she’s had a terrible day at work and wanted to buy a bottle of wine so much she was actually shaking – she managed to resist and then continued to get stronger. I loved her “magnet” analogy as well – how the pull of alcohol is SO strong in the early days of sobriety but the more AF days we stack up the weaker the pull  “Sober Firsts” are so important – Casey cleverly reconfigured her Italian holiday so she went to bed early, got up early to explore, went on gelato crawls instead of wine crawls and treated herself with Venetian jewellery with the money she'd saved from not drinking. Casey has some great analogies – we heard the magnet one and she also talked about how being dependent on alcohol was like carrying a backpack of rocks around – and how sobriety lets you put the burden down. Apart from reducing her anxiety and improving her sleep Casey loves the clarity of mind that sobriety gives us – we can look at our lives with fresh eyes and sometimes we can spot the things which were actually driving us to drink You heard Casey saying that she realized that corporate life had lost its appeal and that she wanted to retrain as a coach which has given her real purpose in her life I asked her for a final tip and love this one:- “don’t wait until you WANT to stop drinking – it’s never going to happen! -  just say you are sober curious and want to take a break to see what sobriety feels like.  Keep going for a few months and you’’ begin to glimpse the joy that alcohol free living can bring. Do have a listen to Caseys podcast which is called Hello Someday, her website is called hellosomedaycoaching.com, she does 1.2.1 coaching as well as offering a course and some freebies. Another great analogy we heard from Casey is that in early sobriety we really have to “throw the book at it” – make it a priority for 6 months, treat it as a research project and “do the work” – the payback will be huge! So check out Caseys website, think about joining Tribesober.com, read the quitlit, listen to the podcasts.. Step one in making a change was to find a community – find your people – if you are looking for a community then just go to tribesober.com and hit “join our tribe” More info Subscription membership for Tribe Sober join up HERE To access our website click HERE If you would like a free copy of our "Annual Tracker" or our e-book "66 Days to Sobriety" please email [email protected] If you would like to come to our Saturday afternoon Zoom Cafe as a guest and meet our community just email [email protected] Episode Sponsor           This episode is sponsored by the Tribe Sober Membership Program.  If you want to change your relationship with alcohol then sign up today           Read more about our 7-step program and subscribe HERE           Book a Discovery Call with me to find out if our membership would help you            Help us to spread the word! We made this podcast so that we can reach more people who need our help.  Please subscribe and share. 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