Any Date With Me's a Blind Date

In this episode, three people in their 30s and 40s talk about dating. In the second episode of season two, Melody speaks with three people in their 30s and 40s about dating - including BANG! illustrator Pinky Fang, who faces a unique set of challenges when it comes to meeting someone new. Pinky talks about blind dating, Ollie gives speed dating a go, Christie talk about dating while also trying to get pregnant, and Guardian columnist Jean Hannah Edelstein offers advice for dating in the wake of the Me Too movement. Pinky is charming and funny, with killer style and a really beautiful dog.If you met her for the first time, as I did, face to face in a well-lit room, you might never know she's also legally blind. Pinky has a rare genetic disorder called retinitis pigmentosa - which causes a breakdown and loss of cells in the retina.The degeneration is in the periphery of her eyes - "so basically I've got tunnel vision and it's getting more "tunnelly" ... the hole is getting smaller," she explains.Another side effect of this type of blindness is that Pinky's eyes don't adjust to the dark, and at night she's completely blind. At 31 years old, the last time Pinky was in the dating game, she says 'dating' wasn't really part of it."Growing up in New Zealand and in a small town, there wasn't so much dating as there was going to a party and getting drunk and hooking up with some guy. Dating has never really been a thing 'til semi-recently."These days if you're 'dating' you're likely on Tinder, Bumble, Grindr or any one of the growing number of apps built specifically to bring people together. But these apps can be a minefield of unsolicited dick pics and various iterations of the greeting "how u?"Not to mention the hours of 'admin' that goes into messaging back and forth until someone bites the bullet and suggests a date - but for Pinky the process is especially fraught. Before she even swipes on a person's photo, Pinky is looking at their picture trying to figure out if they might have stuff in common ("There's so many outdoorsy guys on there... I can't climb a f***ing mountain, I can't see!!"), if they'll be OK with her guide dog ("dog allergies are a deal breaker") and how they might respond when she eventually tells them about that part of herself. "I feel like I'm looking at this person like 'Would they be weird about blindness?'... Like, how can you know? You can't."When it comes to dating with a disability, issues around 'disclosure' can cause a lot of stress…Go to this episode on rnz.co.nz for more details