Are We Really Listening? The Difference Between Hearing and Being Present (Audio Only)

Are we really listening — or just waiting for your turn to speak? There’s a difference between hearing and listening that most of us never stop to examine, and in estrangement, that difference can be the distance between repair and permanent disconnection. In this episode of When Our Adult Children Walk Away, Dr. Janet Steinkamp breaks down what active listening truly requires, why passive listening causes more damage than we realize, and what it looks like to listen in a way that makes people feel genuinely seen and valued. WHAT YOU WILL LEARN: The key difference between hearing and active listening, and why it matters for estrangement What an active listener looks, sounds, and feels like to the person speaking The specific behaviors that signal you’re not fully present, even when you think you are Why kinesthetic learners may seem distracted but are actually deeply engaged How to reflect back what you hear so the other person feels truly understood What passive listening is, when we do it, and the relational cost Why “listening to react” vs. “listening to learn” changes every conversation A simple, practical challenge you can try this week If you’ve ever felt like conversations with your adult child go sideways before you understand why, or like what you say never quite lands the way you intend, this episode gives you a foundational skill that changes everything. "Listening to learn creates connection. Listening to react creates distance.” - Dr. Janet Steinkamp Active listening is a skill. And like any skill, it takes practice, in conversations that matter, and in conversations that don’t, so you’re ready when it counts. SUBSCRIBE for new episodes on family estrangement, parent-adult child relationships, reconciliation, emotional healing, and communication repair. JOIN VIRTUAL OFFICE HOURS: https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/office-hours    LEARN MORE: https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com  Produced by Balancing Life’s Issues #FamilyEstrangement #AdultChildren #EstrangementRecovery #ParentingAdultChildren #FamilyHealing #NoContact #EstrangedParents #ActiveListening #CommunicationSkills #ListeningToLearn #DrJanetSteinkamp #WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway #FamilyReconciliation #EstrangementSupport #EmotionalHealing Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you!DISCLAIMERThe content of this podcast is based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. PROFESSIONAL STANDARDS: Dr. Janet SteinkampWhen Our Adult Children Walk Away with Dr. Janet Steinkamp explores healthy communication, ethical interaction, safe family relationships, and reciprocal (appropriate) boundaries. The podcast provides education and support for parents navigating family estrangement, communication breakdowns, grief, reconciliation efforts, healthy boundary development and adult family relationship dynamics.Dr. Janet Steinkamp's work emphasizes emotionally healthy communication, adult accountability, ethical and safe relationship practices, mutual respect and appropriate boundaries, voluntary communication and reconnection and safe and appropriate family systems. Listeners gain practical tools to improve communication, understand the dynamics of estrangement, and pursue emotional responsibility, compassion, and integrity.