Bamidbar 30: I Vow this is a Good Episode

Chapter 30 can be a difficult read from a more modern standpoint. The chapter offers various scenarios in which a father has the ability to nullify the vows of his wife and daughter. The Torah takes vows very seriously. The prohibition against taking God’s name in vain is one of the Ten Commandments. Vows for sacrifices, property, and even oneself were discussed in Leviticus. Earlier in Numbers, the Torah discussed the laws of the Nazir vow. Like all of these previous chapters, this one is filled with interesting halachot.For example: How long does a father have to annul a vow? There is a disagreement in the Talmud Nedarim 76b. Verse 6 states: “But if her father restrains her on the day he finds out, none of her vows or self imposed obligations shall stand.”וְאִם־הֵנִיא אָבִיהָ אֹתָהּ בְּיוֹם שָׁמְעוֹ כָּל־נְדָרֶיהָ וֶאֱסָרֶיהָ אֲשֶׁר אָסְרָה עַל־נַפְשָׁהּ לֹא יָקוּם(Numbers 30:6)One opinion is that the father has until the end of the day that he hears the vow to annul it. Another opinion is that the father has one day from when he hears the vow to annul it. The second opinion seems to contradict the Mishnah that only referenced the “day of” opinion. The Mishnah also provided two examples to demonstrate the extremes of the “day of” opinion. If the daughter makes a vow on Friday evening right after nightfall, then the vow can be annulled until the next nightfall giving a full 24 hour period. However, if she made the vow just before nightfall, then the father only has a few moments to annul the vow before nightfall comes and with it the next day.The first opinion is from verse 6. However, the second opinion comes from verse 15: “If her husband offers no objection from that day to the next, he has upheld all the vows or obligations she has assumed.”וְאִם־הַחֲרֵשׁ יַחֲרִישׁ לָהּ אִישָׁהּ מִיּוֹם אֶל־יוֹם וְהֵקִים אֶת־כָּל־נְדָרֶיהָ אוֹ אֶת־כָּל־אֱסָרֶיהָ אֲשֶׁר עָלֶיהָ(Numbers 30:15)The phrase “day to day” implies that the father has a 24 hour period that could last from one day to the next. The halacha is that the father can only nullify the vow the day that he hears it.What kind of vows can a husband nullify? At first the Torah states that if a woman makes a vow her husband can nullify it but if “her husband learns of it, yet offers no objection—thus failing to restrain her—all her vows shall stand and all her self imposed obligations shall stand” (verse 12).וְאִם־הַחֲרֵשׁ יַחֲרִישׁ לָהּ אִישָׁהּ בְּיוֹם שָׁמְעוֹ כָּל־נְדָרֶיהָ יָקוּמוּ וְכָל־אֱסָרֶיהָ אֲשֶׁר עָלֶיהָ יָקוּמוּ כִּי־הֶחֱרִישׁ לָהּ בְּיוֹם שָׁמְעוֹ(Numbers 30:12)This seems to imply that he can nullify all of her vows, like a father to daughter. But later the Torah states: “Every vow and every sworn obligation of self denial may be upheld by her husband or annulled by her husband” (verse 14).כָּל־נֵדֶר וְכָל־שְׁבוּעַת אִסָּר לְעַנֹּת נָפֶשׁ אִישָׁהּ יְקִימֶנּוּ וְאִישָׁהּ יְפֵרֶנּוּ(Numbers 30:14)The Talmud in Nedarim 79b points out that the second verse limits the first verse. The halacha is that the husband can only nullify vows that a wife makes that involve self denial and that will cause friction in their interpersonal relationship.