Be the Surfboard, Not the Log: a Buddhist Take on Tough Emotions

Imagine you’re walking down the beach when you see a huge wave crash, the spray soaking your clothes. In the wave is a log bobbing desperately up and down, constantly swept back and forth in the undertow. At that moment, it seems like that wave represents the entirety of the sea. That rough, churning water feels intimidating and vast and even destructive. Now picture that same wave, but gracefully perched atop is a surfboarder, riding it expertly to shore, barely dipping below the surface. In reality, we understand that that one wave is just a miniscule drop in the grand vastness of an entire ocean, but as we stand in front of it, that’s difficult to grasp.  Our emotions can grab us and throw us around like an undertow, then crash and pound us into the sand. The trick? We must learn to serenely ride the wave instead of desperately scrambling to keep our heads above water. Today, I’m delighted to share with you a live recording of a meditation talk I recently gave where I focus on emotions from a Buddhist psychology perspective. It is possible to learn to be nonreactive and avoid clinging to the things that make us feel good momentarily while the bad experiences stick in our minds. In this episode, I teach about the baseline mental/emotional state of a mind, including the difference between the ‘mind’ and the ‘Mind.’ I talk about equanimity and what it’s like to stop chasing and running, and accept things as they are, the way they come. The fact is, when the mind is more flexible and you’re able to roll with life’s changes, life is better than when you’re waiting with anxious vulnerability, just waiting for the other shoe to drop.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: Your weekly LoveByte (02:42) In Pali, the language of the historical Buddha, there was no word for ‘emotion’ (03:24) When the mind is in a state of calm, alert, gentle equanimity, it can be very nonreactive, but not sluggish or zoned out (10:08) Equanimity gives us the grace to no longer have to run around looking for good stuff in order to feel good (15:24) You can be happy, you can be unhappy, you can be neutral—it’s your pick (24:28) Under the pain there is calm; there’s opportunity for grace at any moment (32:31)   Q&A: How can I suffer less in life? To suffer less, learn to practice equanimity and accept those things you cannot change. Why can’t I stay happy? If you’re basing your happiness solely on fleeting things or experiences, you’ll be left always searching. How can I get through a devastating loss? Remember that even in the worst times, there are moments of peace. This experience is just one storm in the ocean of your life.  Let’s Connect! About Me Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Facebook Page   Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Want more of Cheryl’s Buddhist talks? Check out IslandDharma.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.