Greetings greetings welcome to another episode of truth the power. I'm your host Tara Snick Knight I will be joined shortly by my co-host James And we're gonna be talking about Blake Maybe to this topic first of me is playing with me to stop it from I was on Facebook that the day and this Girl that I know she said that Church women aren't getting married church girls don't get married over As she said it the holes in the club and she wanted no why and I was finding that Maybe that more honest about sleeping around than a woman in church because Just because you go to church don't doesn't mean that you follow everything that's in that Bible You know what I'm saying? Or do you have any type of feminine characteristics or you submit to male leadership? That's that said that in the Bible and I want to want to put definition and then I want to get because I'm very limited for Femininity someone to get your own opinion on this There's definition is definition of femininity is defined as qualities are attributes regarding as characteristics of women Which are gelatinous empathy sensitivity caring sweetness compassion tolerance deference and Succance now how I can we do that definition is I think that the idea of femininity has changed with the times I don't think that is the same The definition that you're describing to for today, you know, I think it's and it's not to say is right or wrong I just think you know women identify with femininity, you know without excluding Independence, you know being independent being strong.
I think those are the ways women define femininity these days You know And it's not to say that it's to exclude Submission and being gentle. I just think that it's added more to more layers to femininity You know because to say that femininity is one way is to say that women are one way and that's just not the world We're living in now, you know women are more independent these days, so you have to include that into femininity Okay, that's fair enough. So how but you know like I get there, you know, they're women are strong and they're independent I get that However, like the slang like display those characteristics are being independent and being on strong Do you think that if there has an effect on women getting married? I think it does to an extent Okay You know some some women don't know how to let up on that and allow men to be a man It didn't some men don't know how to allow that want to be independent if that makes sense You know, you have to with whomever made you choose you have to be able to balance or he has to balance you You balance him and I just don't think that you know Men are really raised so So accept that about a woman You know about why we are the way we are, you know As far as the independence and the strong will then all that that's things that we didn't choose to have to be those things that we needed to survive In the last three decades at least You know, it's just a part of how we've evolved as a as a female race So help me understand you know from the little testament When you say men not allowing everyone to be independent, what do you mean about it?
I just think that it's difficult for some men to allow a woman to just be great in the things that she's strong in You know without feeling like their balls and their snatch away from them, you know It's a way Like I said, you have to find a balance, you know, you just have to find that With whomever you're with, you know, some men they want a complete submissive You know, they want to independent, but they're not too independent, you know, it's like come on You picking your shoes, it's like a I mean you pick one thing you want my goods. You gotta take it all So How would you define a feminine or your feminine? Femininity for me is to be compassionate to just understand without saying and things being said also, it's it's independence. It's Just a the nature to take on responsibility Regardless of what man's there what man isn't there, you know, sometimes you still have to do for yourself That doesn't make you less of a woman, you know, so I would incorporate everything every way that the the The makeup of a woman is today in these in these times would be my definition of community It's all those things before and it's just a pound pound of layers, you know, add it onto it It wouldn't be fair to describe a woman in a certain way You know based on something that Based on a definition that was created decades ago.
We're not living back then. It's just not where we are It's not for everybody to speed up. So what's now? Yeah, I totally agree with you But my question is like when you're in public, how is it how important is it to you to display your kind of characteristics?
How important is it? Yeah, you can't just tell me or do you think about it at all? Yeah, I mean, I'm a woman. I feel like a woman At all at all times, you know, I am aware of myself if that's what you're asking Yes, yeah, absolutely.
I'm aware of who I am in society You know, but at the same token, I don't think that that's a box of person You know, it's like picking a man out in the streets and he's masculine, you know, he's showing his masculine, you know, it's like Even you are you aren't you know, it's all about you just walking in your truth and being conscious of it Hmm. That's good stuff. So So they got this new movie coming out called what do what do me want? And they got me thinking like it's supposed to be the reverse of what do men what do men want?
I think we're no Gibson what is right today's but um They got to ride the piano in that role and I would just and I just thought to myself like do women really are one of that contest? Thinking like what do men want when they out we're men at the job or funny? I would man on a date or things like that Yes, yes We're more conscious about it probably than a man is about what a woman's thinking. No Also, I just you know, it's it's all a part of that just awareness your consciousness You know who you are as a woman.
I mean I can't say that I personally just think of you know, but women just a little more detailed I think with how people operate and why do I agree go with you do I can be wrong? I can't speak for me I can't speak for a man, but I don't know. I think it's all about being conscious of who you are in society You know, and that can be and that can be for both male and female I can't I don't think about I can't just say, you know, we probably are more conscious about it but if you if a woman walks through a group of men or Construction workers then she's probably thinking what are they thinking because of experience the whistle blowing the how you doing? It's you know, that kind of thing.
Mm-hmm. It's kind of like a learned behavior I think to make you just already jump to the fact of thinking okay, what do they think you know are assuming what's going to happen? So like on a work in a workplace or and like a social setting do you are you? yourself more conscious about how you present yourself as far as like I guess like your hair or Makeup and things like that.
Like if you're like a like if you walk into work or if you walk into a social setting or anything like that Um, I mean when it comes down to make up and clothing, you know I'm conscious of it all but like I don't wear makeup to work to look like I have a makeup, you know There's nothing wrong with that some women. That's what they do. That's a part of their routine every day before leaving out the home That's fine. That's just not something that I do.
Do I think it it lessens my femininity? No, because I'm already securing that, you know now there may be a day where I do want to want makeup and I can do that But it's about how I feel not about me doing it for somebody else or for somebody this year But I will be conscious Of the fact that okay, this is something different that I'm doing, you know, around a different setting but It doesn't add or take away from our femininity or how confident I am as a woman Okay, now you know, um sometimes I could Sometimes when I speak sometimes I um sometimes I speak ignorant I'm an ignorant person and I say it because I don't I speak and sometimes I don't really see every side of the coin I guess you could say So so one time I found myself making a statement. I said and I had to specify a black women because Just like that black women are had the lowest marriage rate in the country And um almost 70% of all black children are born to single mothers or wear mothers So I say black women who only submits a black man and be will eventually become mothers But never a wife to conduct a name How do you feel about this statement? I think that is true, you know, you can't just um Submit a man in bed because then that's all he's going to respect you for But he wants to mission Full circle So if you just want to give him submission in the bedroom, then that's what he That's what he'll embrace anything out of that if you don't offer it and that's his nature to receive Then he's not going to embrace you That's just the nature of man and woman in my opinion So what so what would be your definition of submission because most people think that submission is really a better thing Already look at it like oh i'm being subservient to somebody on um Just like that.
They also might contain the type of but I don't look at submission like that I think it's a misconception and because every time Submission the word submission is used is usually used in a way to degrade a woman Even with black men in black you submit to me or even when you know something like throw throw the bible at you Wives them it's you know, but then they never they never mention a part where God tells the man. I think it's respect your wives You know, so they don't they apply that negatively so then women rejected even though it's the word of God Because we don't talk about submission in a positive light and either do men You know with that previous scenario i just used to throw in your face You know the bible isn't yet i'll be throwing anybody's face if that's the case adhere to everything in it Don't be selective But I don't think submission is a bad thing. I just think that the misconception is that you know The woman has to be degraded to be submissive And only a real man and you know a man of God will understand that that's not where it is So that's not something he would press on his wine And he shouldn't have to press on her, you know, that's that's also the man looking for the right mate in a sense of you know A lot of women we're not going to submit to a man that's not a leader You know a lot of men walking around don't know how to lead so they will never get us a miss a woman If the black woman has been strong and independent all this time you think she gonna let somebody that's not a leader Lead her and tell her to submit to him regardless You know No, that's interesting. So when so women are They just say women are out and about and you know, uh, I don't know what women typically look for men at you know But whatever y'all are looking for women I'm looking for men on a pro Look at the other crowd of the girl whatever, you know, you know, people you know people get along So what so I'm wondering like what characteristics do you look for Beyond you know the physical because we got to be honest about one thing We the first thing they will try to try somebody's eyes the first thing you see is that person physically there's a physical attraction So after they what are you looking for?
So like these days beyond a physical what I'm looking for is somebody that knows what they were Or is at least clear about what he wants, you know, like don't text me every day what you don't And we don't have any other conversation outside of that Or don't you know, it's like all of that ties into just like i'm 31 years old making 32 in april So I don't have I don't have time for the games that I played in high school in college And the sad thing is a lot of men at 30 years old they're still wicked They're still back there Like planning around like early 20s You know like this is amazing to me So at this point for me, it's just, you know, not what you want to be clear in your thoughts and in your mind When speaking to me, you know Okay So Switching gears just a little bit just a tad bit Dr. Francis chris Wilson stated her book the ices papers In july 1985 which which I found interesting because i'm a star she wrote in that book still go down a day Um, she said there's a dischantment with the institutional marriage There's harmony disrespecting separation in divorce. Um, there's a lack of value of black masculinity and the black community The absence of a black male model for the development of the black male children and youth resorting epidemic level of teenage pregnancy Um, thousand of children abandoned to foster care and adoption Black male bisexuality and homosexuality black female bisexuality and homosexuality And increasing numbers of black females were more educational income than a black male counterparts They are hardly any black persons knowing about happy black couples Now to that you say what I know there's a lot I mean, this is this is speaking from 80 1985 right? Yes So things was just kicking off so that's almost like Seeing in fact what we living now You know, and it's true like it's almost every podcast that we're on I mentioned the lack of the black father in the home and how we still dealing with it even today three decades two decades two three decades later You know stuck with the questions of what is femininity and why women, you know have have a harder time submitting and why?
I mean, it's the breakdown of the family the black family You know, you didn't see a mom in a day at home You saw that sometimes if at all So you didn't have that other person stepping in to give you a different perspective on how men and women operate You know, so when you go into a relationship, you don't understand anything outside of your own sex. So then you turn to what same sex That's what you understand best. Yeah You know, it's like it's not just the men like the the women are more homo Or or lesbians now because they can't connect to a man for whatever reason be it, you know, they can't select the right one or You know They're not around or they don't know what the relationship is supposed to be because their dad wasn't there So they don't get it. They don't have that other side to understand so they don't understand themselves and like mine so they Not a middle-of-the-hand.
I don't know why men or what men lower Or those about me. You know, I can I can say what I see as far as you know women Finding partners and other women but for the men was the excuse Them being molested. I can't say that. I don't know every man wasn't molested every gay man wasn't molested.
So was the reason I don't know Them being locked up. I don't know Yeah, sorry. I haven't only each other in jail sales. I don't know well.
I got well, I worked in a jail before and um I got a I mean, I just to be honest some guys Or just like that before they come um because it'll say I see guys on a traffic ticket They don't get out the same day I tend to have sex with a man waiting to you know And it's most of the time it's a dude that you were looking to be like, oh, he you know, he he he mess with it But on a flip side of that they they don't have much stuff you know, but um Yeah, it just it's just hard. It's just hard but like um Because I mean like my thing is this I'm really just trying to figure this thing out because After like the black family is very important. I feel like we've been like you said before We've been in so much dysfunction and disorder for so long That it's time to bring it back and it's time for us to start valuing marriage to start valuing each other That is black men and black women, you know So Yeah, you know, we do need templates For You know, like me personally, I was thinking the other day To myself when I say I don't know if I ever get mad Is this a fairytale that I'm optimistic about because it's something that I'm supposed to do It's something that I really want Is this realistic in my life? These questions like I don't know.
Is it a bad thing to not be married? I can't say that You know, it's like this Like if you buy a marriage material, you know, I don't believe that I think that some people, you know, cannot decide on one person Decent decide on one person but not for eternity not for life You know, it's like just having relationships and that you can commit to one person for four or five years and then You're over it. So what you do you get a divorce? No, you break up with them.
So If you were married People getting divorced. I mean I would say people get married to get divorced But I don't think that you should get married to get divorced You know, I feel like if I have vows with you, we have not chose we still before God and you I have decided and chosen you But that's just not life all the time Things have been people grow apart and that's the real testament you can grow apart and still stay married Regardless, you know, and no one knows how they're gonna be until they're tested within their marriage So it's staying and overcome. So but me personally, I'm just like, I don't know like I didn't grow up in a two-parrot home I don't know. I don't know what it fully looks like.
I was like, maybe I just not for me What made you start thinking that? Because I was just thinking I was just thinking What triggered it was just me personally how old I get You know, I like how things just are such a turn off of me And I'm just like I can't be turning things off on my husband You know, that's not why I get married to turn things, but you know, we're supposed to keep the wheels going In this thing forever, and I just don't know if I had a constitution for it That's me personally. That's just me reflecting on myself You know Just looking at kind of how I am now just as a single person Now don't get me wrong. I would love to be with somebody and feel like that's my best friend And you know, this is that's like I don't have a problem with committing I don't even have a problem with submitting.
You know, as long as I don't have to be the I don't mind it at all. Like I see this all the time. I want to leave it. You need to be able to be Yeah, always just get good.
I used to be with somebody next to her was you like to be with somebody that was a friend Yeah, like my best friend, you know, like I don't believe in that Um Marrying somebody you don't know and then y'all growing close. No, I don't believe in that at all It's not the seventh century where you marry and you figure you got your whole life to learn efforts and know You know, I want to marry somebody that I have a connection with and we are best friends Like that's my go-to about everything and me for him You know And so it all because if that's if y'all don't have that closeness, then that's when I think other people can get involved in your marriage You know, you can't talk to your spouse, then you're talking to somebody And I don't think that's healthy Because everybody talks, you know to some degree Whether it is direct or indirect. We all talk So if I can't if I can't talk to my spouse and that's a problem and if he can't talk to me, that's bad too So yeah, that's why I see my best friend, but I don't know only guy knows sometimes I can only see Because I don't know what the future holds I remember I was having this conversation with this older guy and I like um Speak away older people because after like they like walking history books They just learned so much from him and he would tell me about his marriage and he was just like um He told me just like it was like um another guy another come to the guy. He's like, yeah, man He's like I wasn't shit.
He said He was he said he even know if he was a single man pretend to be married or a married man pretend to be single He was so far out there and I was just like so Yeah, so I was like so what made you change because you know He started coming in and started on being more of a family now like so what made you change? He was like, I don't know what you did. You just say he just realized what's important to him I mean instead of just you know not willing to work for everything he wanted to put the work in for his marriage You know, I thought that was very good because I come from a long line of older gentlemen that Get married but the foundation of marriage they don't really value it You know what I mean? Yeah, you know, just getting in that's what I don't want to do get married is to get married so many people get married just to get married when they're in those marriages They do everything that's not You know, it's not marriage.
It's not union. It's not one You know too many people get married and they live in that single life on the side. I don't understand it So it's like when you see people like for yourself, you say you see a lot of you've known a lot of people like that Like that. I don't necessarily give you hope, you know, you may be empowered to be a better person But at the same token it's like is this supposed to be encouraging Back you know, you have to be some serious reflection and understanding of what you want to be able to overcome that because that's a condition that can sit in You know, just based on what you see that should that's your visual Yeah, it's well, it's not very encouraging.
It's just Just learning from their mistakes. What I'll even happen to do them Is you know what I'm saying? It's like they tell me what they did wrong. So I don't have to do it So I just it's like somebody like you see a big hole somewhere.
It's like what does they call right? They're always stepping so you're gonna step in it And I just Side stuff that we're not even getting to it Side stuff You can't learn You can't learn through other people's mistakes. I do believe that you know I don't believe what it but you know, sometimes, you know, you're human. We're all human So sometimes you have to really um fight that condition or that negativity As we say these days positive vibes positive vibes So That's what is Um, a man is concerned like my whole thing is I like um once again I'm from that old testament.
I'm living on that old testament Um, I feel like men should be able to provide for their family needs to be able to provide for their women Take care of them and protect and have them for protection as well So how important is it for a man to be able to financially take care of the woman that is the son? Um, it's important to me. It's very important. You know, I need to know that if Or else fails, you know, you can still like You have men that have jobs and then you have some men they'll find that we recall like it's a difference like providers isn't necessarily somebody that's in a career and Cross-nellie that I mean cross-nellie tees and that no I just like that's a provider somebody that can go out and still get regardless because he knows he has a he knows he has a family You know and that's like a protection kind of thing too Like protecting the family while while you know, I do believe that the wife can hold the family together while I'm unprotected So I'm still a little archaic with that too like you You know, um, but as far as you know, can be in a sole providing I only provide I know I don't believe that that's necessarily the case I do believe women, you know, she'll work I think that it's it's a great thing if a wife doesn't have to work But it's even greater if she doesn't have to work but still work to help out and to provide You know So the woman that I'm going to specify this as a black woman because I feel like black women Um has specific needs they have specific Designs and they just specific things that they need as a black woman Um, how do you see that?
You said recently that you don't see yourself getting married, but if you were how would you see yourself? What type of marriage would you see yourself in? That's a good question, Taurus That's a really good question. What type of marriage do I see myself in?
That's a question, right? Yes I really don't know. It's just a little privilege for me to see You know, um, I do believe in a lot of the old school things of provider and you know, um I don't want to sound like I'm in the 50s, but I think that it's it's up to a woman that keeps to keep a household together You know, just like I feel like those same duties can be shared between man and woman But outside of the physical things just as a mate, you know, again a best friend You know, somebody that I that I want to share and talk to all the time with something that I want to spend my time with but We can also respect each other's personal space when it's time to you know being able to talk about whatever whenever And building a home in a family as we see fit not as society tells us it is or as our parents did Or rather good or bad, you know being able to create a life that you're that we're proud of And keeping that first, you know, he's still the cornerstone. He's still in the head of it in my eyes So that's definitely a deal breaker If god isn't in the mix So, um This one was gave the game just a little bit, uh, so recently, um, you know, Terry cool See him and the other hugli they got actually because the hugli and I want something to gossip in person But yeah, he would say he should have snapped the white man that ground around his private points in front of his wife And Terry cool responded like oh, we got us just not to shut up too then when I see him And everybody was kind of getting on Terry cools his case because He was there was saying like oh you got all this energy for the black man, but when the white man Who was sexually and subsidy you did nothing So is that like With that situation what do you think about this situation?
I just want to get to a pain on this situation The point is it's a good thing to point out, you know, you got this hostility and at the end You got all of this hostility about a brother That got on your case about something but didn't violate you But for this white man that violated you Questions you're asking them that it took it was You feel me because it was a test. Yes, man. You can't tell me His manhood wasn't tested when that happened, you know, um And also that happened in front your wife back to that being a protector of provado Yes, you know because you're gonna feel like if I was violated You don't know if I'm a man or a bi police officer, you gonna stand up? Yeah, you know, not that that's their issue, but I'm saying, you know all that got to be a point.
Um Why he didn't do anything? I have no idea Because some people saying well, you know, he got children of feet and all that I'm like listen If listen if my my boss was around my nice in front of my woman He not gonna be on his earth the next day, but who is tarot coos the point where he need a white audience? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like who how great of a you know, we're not talking about Eddie Murphy We know you even talking about a way is brought we talking about tarot croods.
Yeah, that's not to say that man Don't have a family to feed and provide for I get it, but Black Hollywood is not something to step over You know, you can't tell me that if he would have defended himself in a physical way that black hollywood when they had his back image We had a job. No We did for Kevin Hart Like we don't have to write opinions in So it's like you tap dance and I Yeah, you know, you tap dance for what career? for what? because Terry Cruz we know him but do white people really know him like that and if we do know he played chronic roles I'm not trying to bash me.
I'm just trying to make a point here. Yeah, it's far as Who are you protecting? Who are you really protecting by not protecting yourself? When when his violations are please You know, don't be a me too kind of thing don't wait to everybody got something to say for you to say something They don't say much for you as a man.
That's my opinion Because if you're a man, you're gonna operate how you're supposed to operate at all times Regardless of consequences, but that's just my opinion Yeah, I Think As an actor I would turn the channel quick enough if that made it a stand up. I wouldn't watch it I don't think he's funny, but I love his talk show because regardless of his delivery He has some valid points and he has the right amount of passion behind what he's saving it comes down to speaking up for the black community and pointing things out and giving perspective as it should be You know, so but that thing with them. I just I think it'll blow over Sarah Cruz. Yeah I think it'll blow over too, but I got a very cool funny style from now I got it on funny style Speaking of me too.
They did a documentary about Michael Jackson. Now. It's really bothering me for a couple reasons I think it's because I'm a Michael Jackson fan Um always been Yeah You know the people that they hand in the docket me recall leaving Neverland all three of those guys They already testified on the court that they lied about Michael molesting him Now in my opinion, it's all spoken as he was he was more assertive than the most gangster rapper because he owned half a Sony He had the beaters catalog. Yeah, his catalog Elvis catalog and many others and then he went around and he married over his daughter Like he was putting in their face like look at me like for me Michael's awesome game to ship And I can't look at mike as a pedophile now even in delt I feel like they were trying to damage his legacy because all these all these accomplishments that he made to let you say what um It bothered me to you know yesterday.
I was just thinking about I'm just like it's but you know It's atrocious for them to carry this two decade long, you know, this man is deceased How much it was nothing that wasn't shared tonight about this man's personal and professional life Not one thing especially when he passed everything was out there Good bad and ugly Let this let this family go, you know, let them rest this man is is gone You know at the end of the day he has no pain regarding it, but his surviving family members do his kids regardless So I why is this even a story That's like if another one of you some documentary come out I'll show if another a lea documentary for what? Michael Jackson for what? Y'all beat this man so far down in the ground Because true beat told that was somebody talk about self consciousness and awareness. I think he was too self-conscious and aware So why he hated himself so to an extent and wasn't happy And look at him now going Trying to live up to society's expectation Let that man go that man might have more heart in his music and then more social and political Um exposure than any artist Outside of Steve Alonco and my okay Like come on enough is enough find another topic create something new You know But that's my okay Yes, yes Well jay, that's all i got for tonight.
I want to thank you for joining first tonight and um i'm gonna work on this salary for you i promise Oh Probably the other potential salary. Thanks for joining me and contributing. I really appreciate it And we just spoke truth of power good night Good night