BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC by WhatMurdah -- Chapters 13-17 episode artwork

EPISODE · Mar 14, 2025 · 5H

BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC by WhatMurdah -- Chapters 13-17

from Serpent and Scholar - Dramione Fanfiction · host The Audiobook Alchemist

“In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.(With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)Additional Tags:⁠Enemies to Lovers⁠, ⁠Slow Burn⁠, ⁠marriage law⁠, ⁠Forced Marriage⁠, ⁠Post-War⁠, ⁠Angst⁠, ⁠Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD⁠, ⁠Pining Draco Malfoy⁠, ⁠Morally Grey Draco Malfoy⁠, ⁠Jealous Draco Malfoy⁠, ⁠Possessive Draco Malfoy⁠, ⁠Morally Grey Hermione Granger⁠, ⁠BDE Neville Longbottom⁠, ⁠BAMF Neville Longbottom⁠, ⁠Azkaban Tattooed Draco Malfoy⁠, ⁠Therapy Made Me Worse So I Started Writing Fanfic⁠Language:EnglishStats:Published: 2024-01-07 Completed: 2024-05-26 Words: 195,969 Chapters: 21/21

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BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC by WhatMurdah -- Chapters 13-17

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