Boundaries, Burnout & Becoming Yourself – Kate Baxendale’s Journey of Self-Acceptance

Some women hit breaking point and decide to shrink. Kate Baxendale hit hers and chose to expand.After decades in high-pressure leadership roles across the NHS, juggling responsibility for hundreds of lives and navigating the invisible weight of being “the strong one,” Kate found herself unravelling. Not all at once but slowly, subtly, almost imperceptibly.She didn’t fall apart in a dramatic collapse. She became quiet. Disconnected. Withdrawn. She started questioning herself. She stopped recognising the person staring back in the mirror. It was only when she stepped back and asked “What do I need?” that everything changed.In this powerful conversation with Sharni, Kate opens up about menopause, introversion, emotional exhaustion, and what happens when women stop pushing through and finally start listening to themselves.They talk about the danger of toxic positivity, the myth of resilience, and the cost of being the one who always holds it all together.But more than anything, this is a story about rediscovering yourself in the middle of a busy, beautiful, chaotic life and learning that you don’t have to choose between success and sanity.Whether you’re leading a team, holding a family together, or simply trying to stay afloat, this episode will remind you that it’s okay to rest, okay to retreat, and okay to be unapologetically you.Chapter Breakdown & Timestamps:[01:28] Setting Boundaries & Protecting Mental HealthKate discusses personal values and avoiding toxic environments.[04:04] The Struggles of Friendship & Social MediaHow social media impacts friendships and mental health.[07:09] Introversion & Work – Finding BalanceNavigating leadership roles as an introvert.[11:02] Emotional Resilience – The Bucket TheoryManaging emotional energy to prevent burnout.[14:22] Self-Forgiveness & Learning from MistakesThe role of mistakes in personal growth.[19:06] Shame vs. Growth – Overcoming JudgmentHow shame holds people back from progress.[24:44] The 1% Rule – Small Steps to ChangeWhy small daily improvements matter.[29:55] Toxic Positivity – When Encouragement HurtsThe fine line between support and forced optimism.[34:20] Menopause & Career – The Silent StruggleHow menopause affects confidence at work.[41:19] Neurodivergence & Breaking Social NormsFocusing on strengths over limitations.[48:52] Social Media – Filters & Self-WorthThe impact of beauty standards online.[55:00] Final Thoughts – Growth & Moving ForwardKey takeaways on self-awareness and resilience.Resources & Mentions:🔗 Hair loss Education From Sharni: https://www.sharniknightonacademy.com🔗 Connect with Sharni Knighton: https://www.instagram.com/sharni_k_hair?igsh=eGU1YmwwcmdpNTVp 🔗Connect with Tell Her Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tell_her_podcastigsh=Mnlpazd2NWl6OGhn&utm_source=qr ABOUT YOUR HOST — SHARNI KNIGHTON I’m Sharni Knighton, the creator and host of Tell Her. I was inspired to start this podcast after meeting so many extraordinary ordinary women through my hair loss and wig clinic. I wanted to give these women a space to share their stories and help them realize that what they see as “ordinary” is truly extraordinary.As an educator, I also train stylists in the hair loss industry around the world — and I’m passionate about showing them who these incredible women are. I believe you should only step into this work if you’re ready to truly help and connect with the women you serve.✨ Connect with my work:Hair Loss & Wig Clinic → www.sharniknighton.co.ukTraining Academy → www.sharniknightonacademy.comIntelliMESH Product Line → www.intellimesh.co.uk✨ Follow on social:TikTok → @sharniknightonPodcast TikTok → @tell.her.podcast