Boundaries - do they always serve us?

from Can you see what I see? · host Vicki Scott & Grace Hart

Everyone should have healthy boundaries".... and Cloud & Townsend guide us on what that might look like in all areas of our life, including family, friends, spouse, children, work, the digital age, and even ourself.If we don't have those healthy boundaries in place, it can be for many reasons including a fear of guilt, not being liked, losing the love or connection or approval of someone we care about.Sometimes we confuse "boundaries" with a perception that someone or some experience has not met a need we have (even if we don't name it like that!), and we might put up a wall - which brings a disconnection with a person or experience - so we shrink the possibilities for us and our life, our world becomes smaller. It is important to have an awareness of energetic boundaries - this is powerful in being able to be fully present in situations which we might otherwise avoid. You will know in every moment whether it is right for you to engage or not.Becoming trauma aware will help you understand whether the matter is one of boundaries, or whether a person/situation has provided you with an opportunity to heal a past trauma you didn't even know you had, which means you are back to the centre of our flower, or reconnected with your true self.Dr Gabor Mate YouTube video called “Discover Your True Self” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ybld6IG1KtA Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control Of Your Life (Cloud & Townsend)Boundaries With Kids: How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children (Cloud & Townsend)The Body Keeps The Score: Mind, Brain and Body in the Transformation of Trauma (Bessel Van Der Kolk)In An Unspoken Voice (Peter A Levine)Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving (Pete Walker)When The Body Says No: The Cost of Hidden Stress (Dr Gabor Mate)www.thewisdomoftrauma.com To connect with Grace please visit choosinggreater.com To attend Grace’s Trauma Transformer weekly zooms please go to https://www.theunseenadvantage.com/online-zoomy-zoom-zoom-roomFor other podcasts with Grace please visithttps://www.theunseenadvantage.com/podcast-roomTo read our terms and conditions and disclaimers includes all interviews and podcasts by Grace - Vicki Scott and Choosing Greater. https://www.theunseenadvantage.com/terms

What this episode covers

Cloud & Townsend in their book "Boundaries" say people often focus on being loving and giving that they forget their own limits - they wonder "can I say no and still be a loving person?" But what if "setting boundaries" is actually much bigger than we realise? What if an awareness of Energies is also an important part of our toolbox? What if we use boundaries as an excuse to shut out something, and what if letting something in is actually an opportunity to reconnect with our true self? The wisdom is in recognising the difference........