Burn Your Romance Novels and Save Your Relationship

Picture it: a gorgeous, tanned man with huge, hulking muscles and long flowing hair clutches a beautiful waif wearing an artfully tattered dress… maybe they’re in front of a fire or in a picturesque field or sea side. There’s an obvious reason these types of books have an everlasting fan-base, but the fact is, relying on fantasy for your expectations of real life simply isn’t healthy—nor is it sustainable. Today, I’m talking about fantasy, fiction, and why avoiding living in the real world is one of the most damaging things you can do to yourself.  In this episode, I’m giving it to you straight because the truth is there is no happily ever after in any of our lives, in any of our relationships—the price of love is loss. There's an inherent risk in love, but you only need to suffer when you buy into the idiocy that there's something perfect that will keep you happy ever after.  In This Episode, You Will Learn: When you get lost in fantasy and you're dreaming about something other than what you have, you are unhappy (04:02) One of the most glorious parts of falling in love is believing we’ve found someone who is perfect—even if we know deep down it’s not true (07:19) Stop longing for what you don't have, stop believing there's something better out there. There's something different out there, but different doesn’t mean happy ever after (09:36) Try and think of Valentine's Day as a great excuse to do something romantic and fun with and for your sweet heart (14:00) One of the best ways to be unhappy and wreck your relationship is to long for what you don't have (18:31) Kill the soulmate in your head. Look at the perfectly imperfect, glorious person standing right in front of you (24:14) Your weekly LoveByte (26:57) Q&A: The only satisfaction I get is when I read/watch sexual fantasies, should I be worried? When you’re engrossed in fantasy, it generally means that you’re unhappy in your “real” life. Try exploring this and see what’s making you so unsatisfied.  My partner is constantly disappointing me, what can I do to make them change? If you’re constantly longing for what you don’t have in a relationship, you’re never going to be happy.  I’m never happy in my relationships, what’s wrong with me? When you long for something that isn't present, you're not living this moment and you will never find happiness doing it.  Resources: This Valentine’s Day Burn Your Romance Novels by Cheryl Fraser Fear of Flying by Erica Jong Let’s Connect! About Me Website - Sign up for Weekly LoveBytes here  Facebook Page   Youtube If you want to rate your relationship, take the Passion Quiz Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.