BW 016: Four Reasons Why Grief is Hard

Have you ever wondered why grief hurts so much? Or why we can feel like we're adapting to the new way of life. We've accepted that our person isn't coming back, but then we find ourselves almost reverting or going back to being in denial and thinking that we have this weird balance of I know they're not coming back, but I think this is just a bad nightmare and I'm having a hard time reconciling that. But wait a minute, I felt like I already settled those feelings. I got to nerd out a little bit and I spent some significant time reading a really cool book that I want to share with you, and I wanted to better understand why our brains work the way they do. Why we have such a hard time battling grief or understanding what's normal, what's not normal, if there is such a thing, and just why our minds and our emotions kind of work the way that they do. We talk about: The 5 stages of grief Why we don’t go backwards in grief How grief is like a broken bone The lack of understanding of what it means to grieve in our culture     Quotes- “One of the reasons why grief is painful is just our understanding, or rather lack of understanding what it means to grieve, what to expect when a person that we love so intimately passes on or dies, and what the healing journey looks like. We're really, as a culture, just not educated on that and don't talk about it nearly.” “One of the biggest points of frustration or fears that several of my widow friends have is that they're reverting and the reality is we can't go backwards. As you're healing and you're moving forward in life, there is no going backwards. The reality of these stages of grief or of these components is that we're just ping ponging all over the place.” “The challenge is that there is no perfect timeline for grief and for grieving. There is no either or, there's not a well you've grieved and now you're done with that and you're moving on to being completely healed and this new life and this new journey. Congratulations. Here's your graduation certificate. You're now moved away from grief. That is just not the reality of what happens in grieving.”   The Brave Widow Community is a place where you can connect with other widows, find hope and healing, and begin to dream again for the future.  Learn more at bravewidow.com.     Hey guys, I’m Emily Jones I was widowed at age 37, one month shy of our 20 year wedding anniversary.  Nathan and I have four beautiful children together.  My world was turned completely upside down when I lost him.  With faith, community, and wisdom from others, I’ve been able to find hope, joy, and dream again for the future.  I want to help others do the same, too!   FOLLOW me on SOCIAL: Twitter @brave_widow Instagram @brave_widow Facebook https://www.facebook.com/bravewidow YouTube @bravewidow