CACP - #67 - Rapture for Dummies

Rapture for Dummies - With all of the obvious signs that the end of the world is quickly approaching…What signs? Earthquakes, tornados, birds falling from the sky, dead sea lions, individuals bursting into flames in porn stores….need I continue?  Well, if you do believe we want you to be prepared so we have put together a check list of must have items including but not limited to tools to distil water (see Marc), a horse, dog poop insurance, tim tams, a double p dildo, a tub of boy butter (I am sure the Rapture is like the lines at an amusement park, hurry up and wait, boy butter helps the time pass) and do not offer to play JC Gaga’s new song.  I tend to think it’s still a bone of contention between them.  Wouldn’t it be a kick in the ass if the Rapture is like that movie Signs and they avoid the water?  This would mean Matt at his lake house is safe.  Well, I’ll be goddamned, literally. www.cocktailsandcreampuffs.com