Can Women of Color and White Women Be Friends?

From Fear to Friendship: The 30-Year Journey of an Interracial Women's Circle What does it really take for women across race, identity, and experience to move from awkward conversations to real friendship? In this episode, I talk with two people I deeply respect—Julie O'Mara and Dr. Sid Reel—about a women's circle I'm part of  that's been meeting for nearly 30 years. What started as a conference breakout session turned into something far more rare: a space where white women and women of color stayed in relationship through grief, anger, mistakes, growth, and joy. We talk about confidentiality and why it matters. About staying at the table when things get uncomfortable. About what happens when people don't feel alone anymore. And about the difference between talking about race and actually knowing people whose lives are shaped by it. This isn't theory. It's lived experience. And it's a reminder that real connection doesn't come from slogans or training slides—it comes from time, trust, and being willing to keep showing up. We share raw, transformative experiences that took us from initial fear and distrust to deep, meaningful friendships. The episode explores the group's origins, the critical role of confidentiality, and the hard truths they've confronted about race, privilege, and solidarity. You'll learn the challenges and rewards of having tough conversations about race and how these led to profound support and solidarity during life's toughest moments.   Timestamps & Key Segments: 00:00 Introduction and Podcast Overview 01:10 Meet the Guests: Julie O'Mara and Dr. Sid Real 04:45 The Women's Circle: Origins and Purpose 12:38 Confidentiality and Trust Building 20:02 Personal Stories and Experiences 27:54 Challenges and Learnings in DEI 35:50 Standing Up and Women's Circle Support 36:57 Building Comfort and Social Connections 38:26 Shared Experiences and Mutual Support 41:33 Assumptions and Learning Moments 54:00 Starting and Sustaining a Circle 01:01:12 Final Thoughts and Contact Information Guest Bio:Julie O'Mara is coauthor of the free Global Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Benchmarks (GDEIB): Standards for Organizations Around the world along with Alan Richter, PhD, and Nene Molefi. It is available in English, French and Spanish and it and several free User Tools and other resources may be downloaded for free at www.GlobalDEIBenchmarks.org Dr. Sidalia (Sid) Reel recently retired as Director of Staff Diversity Initiatives in Berkeley's Equity & Inclusion Division. Charged with implementing programs and policies to foster an inclusive and welcoming work environment, she co-founded the Next Opportunity at Work Conference; managed the campus-wide Multicultural Education Program; and consulted with departments and teams on equity and inclusion topics. She is a recipient of both an individual and a team Chancellor's Outstanding Staff Award for these efforts. Prior to UC Berkeley, she spent over 20 years leading corporate global diversity and inclusion organizations. A Berkeley native, she earned an EdD at USC, an EdM at Harvard, and a BA in Sociology at Scripps.   Click here to DONATE and support our podcast All donations are tax deductible through Fractured Atlas. Simma Lieberman, The Inclusionist, helps leaders create inclusive cultures. She is a consultant, speaker, and facilitator. Simma is the creator and host of the podcast, Everyday Conversations on Race. Contact [email protected] to get more information, book her as a speaker for your next event, help you become a more inclusive leader, or facilitate dialogues across differences. Go to www.simmalieberman.com and www.raceconvo.com for more information Simma is a member of and inspired by the global organization IAC (Inclusion Allies Coalition)    Connect with me: Instagram Facebook YouTube Twitter LinkedIn Tiktok Website Previous Episodes What Was DEI Actually Meant to Do—and Why Did It Go Off Track? Curiosity, Not Cancellation: Real Talk with Dr. Julie Pham Voices of Triumph: Stories of African Women Immigrants in America Loved this episode?  Leave us a review and rating