I got injured in December of 2020. I saw that video on point hub. Another announcement I want to make. I committed just for the year of 2023 to not be gay.
That's for the year. I'm not going to be gay. How great would it be? If I'm saying this, saying all this right now, and then you find out tomorrow I killed myself in my hotel room.
Like I hung myself right off the balcony. Johnny is like 100% like Nadav gay. You know what? As soon as you see it, you're like, that guy's got cum dripping out of his ass.
100%. Two. He's back. I mean, you really at this point don't need an introduction, but we'll just go ahead and say it.
The right intention wrong move tour is going. You can get tickets right now at chrisdcomedy.com. Give it up for Chris to Stefan, everybody. Hello.
What's up everybody? Good to see you. Tom. First of all, I just want to start by telling you, I know we got the glasses on.
I will get to it. I've gone completely insane. I mean, I've completely lost my mind. It's a different thing.
What's going on with me? The kids been making money. I mean, dude, you serve time? Yeah.
But when you got out there was a bag waiting for you. I almost literally just had David Cross on it. I'm such a big David Cross fan. And I almost walked out and went, what's up, you boy?
Like, because with these glasses on, it's just what happens. Yeah, like you just think you can get away with anything. And but I want to tell you first, first of all, I haven't seen you in a while, you look fantastic. Oh, thank you.
Dude, fucking Tommy Tess is my favorite Tommy. I literally love, dude. This thing is too big, man. You look great.
You really look great. And I want to get into it right away. Yes. I want to say that September 22nd, I'm doing Radio City.
In New York, Radio City. That's the big time. Especially for a New York kid. For a New York kid, it's all about you do Radio City.
You don't make shit, but it's the prestige play. Yeah, that's the thing. Who wants to sell 5,500 tickets and not really get paid? You do Radio City music, radio music, all that.
And with all the free tickets I have to give away to my family and friends, I'm going to lose money, actually. You're going to lose money. But I don't care. It's an honor.
It's like the thing to do. It's all like the goals to MSG. And I want to say thank you to you, because I genuinely mean this. I said this the last time.
My fan base has started to increase. And my ticket sales increased after I've started coming on your show. And now I know there's always some groups of people in my show that I know the only way they can come is by sticking pencil at in their dick. And I know that they're your fans.
And because of that, I got you a gift. Oh shit. I wanted you to fucking know what I'm about it. I got you a gift.
Whoa. Get out of here. Holy shit. Look at that, baby.
Man, I don't know if you guys can see this. I don't know if you can see that, but it says a framed Garth Brooks card where he's wearing a Royals uniform. He looks big. He looks big, dude.
He looks like 2014 Tom Chagora. Yeah. He says 300 bodies. So close.
Yeah, baby. Thank you. This is going on the wall. Oh, dude.
Well, that's for you. Can I appreciate it, Showa? Well, you know, we're genuinely genuinely. We say that you say this to people.
We're genuinely huge fans of yours. And you make me laugh. Like no other. I mean, I remember not long ago you were on Kimmel.
And your post said, watch me bomb on camera. Even that makes me laugh. And yeah, dude. By the way, you think I look good now?
Six months from now? Dude. You're not going to, I mean, like real. Like you're going to feel a sexual.
First of all, I feel it now. Right. The thing is with me is I feel it now. But I've committed another announcement.
I want to make I've committed just for the year of 2023 to not be gay. That's for the year. I'm not going to be gay. Because I mean, you know, my drunk techs did you the other night.
Yeah, you can do that. Yeah, pull it out. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. And I can read it on that as my problem. Go ahead. I'm like, what the fuck am I?
I'm out of nowhere. I texted Tom because I got blitzed. I said, I'm coming on your show in late February. And the chicken and Eskimo kiss your belly button.
Call myself a faggot on FaceTime to conduct. So get ready. I woke up the next morning. I said, dude, I have no recollection of sending this text.
I was on Five to Kill's in Cleveland. But I stand by what I said. And I will follow through. That was fantastic.
Yeah. But I'm not. I don't know where Nadav is. He is in rehab right now.
Is he? For gambling. Yeah. That's the first thing I think I think of you know, you used to really shine shoes.
You used to do a good job. You could see your fucking looks like a mirror. You look like that guy. You look like the guy who's also like, it's six grand.
And it's due today. Yeah. If you like them though, should I commit to this? What are we thinking?
Oh man. I mean, is it on stage two? Yeah. Oh yeah.
Oh yeah. Oh fuck yeah. That is a leap, man. Dude, like take me back to when these first came.
Like what led to these? So it's my guy, Anthony Aiden, Anthony Aiden, Opticoldown in Manhattan, St. Mark's Avenue. Only New York is a plug.
Anthony Aiden left my shoes. It's fucking Tony's not. Anthony Aiden, dude, he's also an MMA guy. So he's fucking the only guy I'll sell you glasses with Colin Flourier.
Holy shit. This guy, absolutely. I saw Robert Kelly, the great rock. He's a big glasses.
He had glasses on there. Was that from him? That's from Anthony Aiden. OK, so Kelly also messaged me.
He's like, I told you, these are cool glasses. He sent me a link. He's the guy. Yeah.
No, Anthony, that's the guy. He's awesome. Got me these frames. And they're like these 1980s frames.
I go on stage. You know, they call me Chrissy Dahmer now. They're Jeffrey Dahmer vibes. Oh shit.
I didn't think of that. A little bit. But it's become a look. My family hates it.
My mother hates it. What about your lady? Lady does not like it. She thinks it's too much of a douche vibe.
You know, she's like, you got to watch on. You got a glasses. Who are you? What are you wearing on the wrist there?
AP Royal Oak. You got to fucking look. Give a fuck. Holy shit.
That's my mind. Holy shit. Tom, I don't care. Big flex.
Big flex. I don't give a fuck. And I'm, by the way, I'm intermittent fasting. So I'm only sucking my last window.
You look really good. You look really good. I appreciate it, man. So what are you down?
How much are you down? 35, baby. 35 LBS. Trente, y cinco.
So you got, you're down 35. Yeah. You got the new, don't fuck with me glasses on. Yeah.
And AP Royal Oak on the wrist. Yeah, I mean, yeah, dude. What's going on? I have cancer.
OK. That's what it is. And are we going to keep going? Are you going to keep going down on weight?
Yeah, I think. OK, so here's the thing. So I had a goal. I said on my podcast on Chrissy Kansett.
If I don't get down, the goal is 205 pounds. I said if I get down, if I don't get down to 205 pounds by June 5th of this year, I was going to cut off to the tip of my paper. I said we'll cut it off on the Patreon. By which day?
Yeah, by June 5th. I'm sorry. I'm cut off the tip of my pinky. But now I've got, dude, I went on.
It was March of, I'm sorry, it was August of 2022, my birthday. And I was 255 pounds. Were you really? Yeah.
And I was wearing, and I was wearing, you know, TT Jerry, you know, in my life, TT Jerry, my girlfriend's transgender uncle lives with us, Google TT Jerry. She wears all different kinds of wigs. So I was fucking around on my birthday, and I put on one of her wigs, and I got on the scale, and I weighed 255 pounds. And I said, I look like a fat Howard Stern.
And you know what I think about TT also? I bet TT's real honest about how you're looking. Like when you're 255, she's like, don't look good. No, she was honest with me.
And you know what she said about these glasses? Because you know, like she served 20 years in prison. She was like, I've stopped a lot of motherfucker's dicks in prison. I wore those glasses.
She was like, the mafia don't want to tell you. But they all love getting their dicks by me. Yeah, I was like, OK. I believe you.
But so now I'm down to about 215 to 217. But I think that of 205 might be a little much, because I want to stay strong. Well, here's the thing. A couple of things about it.
People get, I mean, this is in my experience, people get married to the number. And you know what I mean? We get obsessed with the number. It's really not about the number.
It's your body composition at numbers. There's some people that carry 210 to 215. And they're like, yeah, that's perfect for them. Other people based on their body composition, their frame 185, is like their per.
So if you just go like, no, it's this number. You can get to that number. And it's not the right one. I mean, you look great right now, dude.
Thank you. You look great. I feel, I will say at 215 now, I have a before and after. I have a picture of me at 215, not in shape and 215 in shape.
And it's radically different. It's like, it's like, whoa, like one of my tips are pointing this way. And the other one, it's like, here's the thing too, though, what I've had to get over is these fitness people that we followed, you're never going to look like them. Like they have committed a life to it.
I don't like, you look great now, but it's like, do we have six pack abs? No. And there is a level that you're like, what? Here's what you realize.
If you want to, if you go that, that guy can I look like him? The truth is, you can, you can look like him. It becomes a matter of choices. Like you're like, are you willing to make the choices to do that?
And based on your lifestyle and what you enjoy and what you do, how you travel, it's like, you're probably not going to agree to do those things. Right. You can still look great and be happy, right? But you have to at least go, there are choices that I'm willing to make and ones that I'm not.
Yeah. And I think too, when you get that in shape, those guys who do that, like I said, they dedicate their life to it, they don't have a personality because of them. Because it don't. I mean, you talk to somebody's guy, they're great, but like you message some of them.
Like these guys are retard. But that's why he's so strong and good. And so you can, but to have a personality, you need to get out of the gym and talk. They're just talking to their protein shakes.
You can't do that. There's a level of like, there's levels of this shit, like anything. And with fitness, that's what you find when you start. Like I've gotten way more into it in the last year.
And then what I find is like, I'm at a certain level. And I, and when you make a certain commitment, that's when you realize, oh, there's the people doing this much more and this much more. And then there's the people who are doing that much less than you. And you have to pick a tear that you're comfortable living in.
The thing you don't want to do is leave the team. Like go like, I'm out. Right. Because that's when shit falls apart.
You have to have some level of commitment. I was thinking about this today. I don't know who's had a better glow up than you. From what you used to look like to now, the only person I could think of that looks better.
And that's like how to better glow up. That's when from like, oh my god, to just gorgeous, is Elliot Page. That's one of the, is now Elliot Page looks great. Yeah.
And, and, and, yeah. See, he looks awesome. Yeah. So this is, so that's it.
But other than, I mean, when you look like, you know, when sometimes you're on the Netflix and you know, old times a girl pops up. Oh, I know. It's, it's like. Dude, it happens to me too.
And I also, you know what the one that actually happens to me. This shows you the shame involved in this shit too. People will sometimes tag me in a photo. And you can tell there's like a gen, like they're like, oh my god, I can't believe you're coming back to, you know, Minneapolis.
Right. I met you there in, you know, 2014. And then, and they post a picture of us together. Right.
And I look at myself in the photo and I'll be like, fuck. Like I'll be like, this looks so bad. Right. That they're like, this was a great night.
It's a happy post. Right. And I'm like, I don't want to like it. Now I'm not, but you at that time probably didn't think anything.
You were like, I'm happy. I did not. I, I, it's a level of delusion. I'll tell you the real truth, man.
Last year, I didn't realize that it was happening to me again. You were getting big again? So this is what happened when I got injured, I got injured in December 2020. Right.
I saw that video on Pornhub. And when I left the hospital, one of the things people told me was they're like, you know, I became, I was already, I was a big dude when I got hurt. I was over, I was close to, I was too 45, too 47. OK.
And I'm, and I get injured. And then everyone's like, you know, you like literally, you can't move. Like they're telling me like, you know, you're not going to be able to move. So what I started to do when I got out of the hospital, I'm home and I can't move.
And I started to eat really clean and really reduce portions. And I started to lose weight. But I was losing at the muscle and fat. Like the muscle that I did have was gone because I wasn't doing any exercise.
And I was losing fat, but I was just eating like pretty clean every day. When I finally became mobile again, I had lost all this weight, but I lost muscle and fat. So then I start to get active again. I started to go out.
You know, I want to get active. I started lifting weights, light doing stuff, eating. I start putting on both. And then my tour gets crazy.
I'm bringing a trainer on the road, but I start to get, I didn't get lazy with lifting, but I got lazy with diet again. And it was last April. I shot this. I had 12 days off and I went to LA and I shot this project.
And when I was leaving there, I remember somebody going, they said, keep, because they were telling me they were like, you look good, like, you know, because I started to lift again. And then keep going with the lifting and the diet. And the way that I heard it, it wasn't like you look great. Like I'm telling you now you look great.
They were like, get back. To me, it sounded like they're like, you need to get back. Don't forget about the diet. Don't forget.
Yeah. Don't forget because you're kind of on the line right now. Right. And I was like, that's how I swear.
I thought they meant it that way. At least that's how I heard it. And when I got home, I realized that I got on a scale and I had gone up to like 2.38 again. And a few months prior, I was like 220.
I was like, how did this? How did it go from that day when I got home? I readjusted workouts and diet and then has just been a steady decline. What do you wait now?
199 this morning. Wow. So is that the goal was the goal to be under too? Well, I actually, I try not to obsess.
It's like I was telling you, it's about body composition. It's like what, like, I don't know what my end where I feel like this is a great way to carry around. I feel pretty good now. I definitely feel like I could definitely do more.
Like, I feel like you're saying that. But if like two days from now you were two I want, you'd be looking and you're like, way to go, fatty. Oh, I think you're right. I would be upset.
I definitely want to be leaner. No, well, you, but dude, this is the best I've ever seen you look. I remember this. I think you were doing this when you're doing like the beacon in the hulu.
Yeah. New York. And I randomly saw you outside of coffee shop. You were leaving your hotel.
Yeah, that was last year. And you looked like dude, you had on this. And I was like, wow. I remember seeing I was like, first impressions, like dude, Tom looks like this, right?
And then I was talking because you were coming out. And we were talking for about 40 seconds. You're on your next thing. You're going off to your next thing.
And then I saw you pull a muffin out of your pocket. I said he's hiding his tits. That's what it is. Because by the way, that's a month before, that's one month before the conversation.
I'm telling you this one. I'm saying, so you look to me, you look jacked, but you pull the muffin out of the pocket. So that's the pocket out of the pocket, which I listened. I've been there before.
I said, this is what happens. You know, Tom, but you look good, but now it's now it's undeniable. And I think to what happens is what I've given up on, not giving up a block. Just like I said, I just want to be healthy now.
It's about being healthy. And I'm not going dating. Was that scale the thing when you saw the 255? Swear to God.
I go on the scale. By the way, laughing about it with the family in jazz. My girl, everybody's laughing. It's fun.
It's silly. That's the sickness though. That's the enablers. And then when you go, I want to lose weight.
Jazz and the fam go, you're good. You start saying that and you're like, fuck. It's not good. And then what happened was, it's that.
And it just came over me. It was my birthday, August 26. I went in the shower. I was in the shower just rubbing my tits.
Just putting so deep in my belly button. It crumbs out. Laughing about fat Howard CERN. I swear to God, uncontrollable because I was like, I used to be an athlete.
And I was like, you gotta, you have to do something, Chris. And then it's almost like, I don't want to say it's like the universe that tells you something or maybe you're just looking, but I was on Twitter that day, maybe three hours later, just scrolling mindlessly. And I see Elon Musk tweet, zero fasting app really is good. If you're looking and it wasn't a promote, it wasn't paid.
He was just like, genuinely like zero fasting app is zero intermittent fasting app is pretty good. And I was like, you know what? Just download it. I said, your birthday, just by Christmas, just be in the right direction.
And then I started intermittent fasting, eating in most days, eight hour window, some days, six hour window. And kind of not even dieting crazy, like not even like, like I'll still have pizza. I only have sweets now on Saturday, but back then I was still having sweets here and there, whatever. So I wasn't like, I'm only eating vegan lettuce wraps.
It wasn't that it was just staying in that fasting window. So you're doing a minimum of a 16 hour fast? Is that what it is? A minimum of 16 hours.
So like, you know, like, like typically my feeding window is like 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. But sometimes it would go from 12 to six or feeding windows sounds like a real pig. Dude, I know.
I know. Well, that's what I am. I eat out of a truck. And if I drag me if I'm wrong, but your lady is like a fitness, lady, she's a fitness instructor.
And she was like, and because the whole thing with the intermittent fasting was she was like, look, Nick, because we were, I have a gym. Like, you know, we have like nice gym set up. We turned like my garage, basically just into a gym. So I was like, so I have all the equipment right there.
And she was like, I'll help you. She was like, you know, get on the spin bike. I was like, I'm not getting on the spin. What am I fucking?
I'm not going to buy in my ass. I'm not getting off. So I'm not, that's an adop stuff. An adop spins.
So I, so I, isn't it really? And rehab, by the way, he's gambling is adequate. All right. Well, listen, he can, my father was a compulsive gambler.
We got to talk to him. Yeah, we will talk to him. By the way, he turns it fast and drop 45 pounds. Looks fantastic, but now he has one of those neck pussies.
Yeah, he turns it on. And so, and so, and so, and so he looks great, but this fasting stuff, when I said to myself, just stay in this eating window, just stay in this eating window for now for the first couple of weeks and try to take a food away a week, but just the first goal is just stay in the window. And when I started to realize, was after like drinking, you know, I watched this documentary once I said the human body pins a five 30 days without food. Yeah.
So this idea that I have, it's in your mind. You're so I just know what Mark Bell told me. Mark Bell is a big power lifter. When I told him, I was like, yeah, you know, I want to drop weight and everything.
He's given me all this like different advice. And one of the things he says to me, he goes, by the way, you know, when you're hungry, and you're like, I need a snack. He's like, what are you six? He's like kids, like little kindergartners, they have a snack.
Yeah. You don't always need a snack. Right. You're hungry.
You think I need a snack? Just wait. Yeah. You're not a little child who's like a snack time.
It's yeah. Yeah. It's true. Because and even guy, I got Mark Bell like a power lifter.
He's probably, he's eating like a lot. He's probably eating in a smaller window too. So, so, so I say eating with purpose, right? So it's like knowing, knowing, I want to get this much protein in.
So he's making six eggs. Right. And it's, but he's eating when he's, when it's time to eat, but eating, not mindlessly eating. Yeah.
So, so, so when I did two things happen, critically like that happened to me, and this is when I, you know, it's all positive, but this is when the initial insanity started to happen is with the intermittent fasting, when I made, I made two decisions, two big decisions in like an hour of each other. I said downloading the zero fasting app, you're going to start right now. And then I said, I'm done with social media. I know I need it for my tickets.
I know we, so I, I, I know it's like, I can't be off it. Like I need to have the presence there, but I said, I'm willing to pay a person to run this for me. And I'm talking about, give it up in the sense of I to this day do not even have access to my own social media. I don't seriously have the password.
I have no idea how, but that was all by design. I like pressed the nuclear button on him and said, you give the pet gave it to a friend of mine, my, my man, Brian Morin, who's fucking great guy, runs my social media. He's got a haircut, like Lancelot, like from the 1600s. You got to see, I've never seen a guy like rock a Bob, like he looks like a medieval painting, but he crushes.
And he's a big fan of you. And, and so he crushes my social media. He's, he runs it all because I, I actually, I was locked out of my social media. It just happened, got locked out of my Instagram and there was an initial panic.
But then I was like, as a couple of days went by, I was like, wow, like not checking this. It's like making me feel better. And we got on a call with Instagram to try to get me back into my account because there's all these problems. And I already had prior Brian and we were on this call and the guy says from Instagram, he's like, you know, it's good that you have somebody running your social media.
And I was like, yeah, I know it's like, you know, it's just easier for me. Whatever. I mean, it's good. He goes, we are, we are doing studies right now, like psychological studies that are going to be done over the next couple of years and anybody, the numbers only 20,000 followers, what they're finding right now, anybody has over 20,000 followers on any social media account.
It's not, they said, it used to be the negative comments. How that will mess with your equilibrium, mess with your balance, mental balance, that's with your spirit, like, you know, negative, you know, we can't handle it. But they're seeing also the positive comments, throws off your ego. You get such these personality switches that it leads to like this depression, this anxiety, all these mental health issues.
And I found that, and he said, this guy said, he was like, you know, this, you'll see like 50 years from now, people will be like, it's the same thing because it's so poisonous for you. And I, to me, it's no coincidence that my whole, like, I was able to drop all this weight and change everything and things just went off of that. Social media got it off and then the weight came off. And then, and then, to be honest with you, I was so nervous about ticket sales and all that.
And my ticket sounds have just been going up because I'm spending more time being creative and spending more time, you know, living my life. And again, social media is important. We live in the world, like that's the only way to get to the fan. So I do it, but and I'm writing the bits out.
I'm filming the videos, but I'm sending them to my guy. to my guy. So, I made a decision where like, if I don't know you, I won't let a stranger influence me positively or negatively anymore. Like, if you say anything, if you think I'm great, you think I suck, it has zero effect on me.
I don't know you, so I can't put any energy towards it. That's important, man. I mean, I know a few very successful people with large followings that do what you do, have zero access to their own stuff. And they feel like it's just a time waste.
And they're able to do more. And the real interesting thing is, even before social media, it's this thing that I always thought about as a stand up where somebody tells you you suck, that feels terrible. I'm talking about even in person, right? Someone's like, you fucking suck.
Damn, that feels bad. But then you realize that it's also, you also don't want to buy into you're the best. Right? Because that, where you really want to stay is somewhere where you realize both extremes are not good or realistic.
You're not the worst at this or anything really. And you're not the best. And if you start buying into either side, it's going to fuck you up. Yeah.
And I think that that's why staying off it. You know, it's another big thing I noticed about not being on social media is, you know, I love Teddy Roosevelt. I love what he stood for. Yeah.
I love Teddy, I'm going to put his statues back up. I love, I love Teddy Roosevelt because he had a quote that that he may have stolen from the Native Americans, who knows about he was known for that. And, and, and so, but he said was comparison is the thief of joy. And I, I, when I read that, I was like, you're right, because I noticed the reason why I've been able to stick with my fitness plan thus far is because I've been off social media.
I can tell you how many times I would get going, lose the initial five pounds, be in the gym for the three weeks, whatever, and then see somebody on social media who's absolutely shredded, absolutely ripped, doing all these things and would make me subconsciously, I would compare myself to them and feel bad about myself and say, well, I'm not going to hit my goal anyway, or same thing with, you know, with my peers and stand up, you would be like, you know, feel good about a show, oh, I sold out that, and then you're like, oh, so and so, sold out seven shows there. And then you're happy for them, but you're also starting to compare, be like, well, I suck and, and all that went away. So it's not comparing myself to others, but the bigger thing that I noticed, I stopped comparing me to me. I stopped comparing myself to what I was six months ago, because subconsciously you'll look at some, you'll look at yourself from a few months ago, and it's the perfectly crafted picture video and you've forgot all that.
And you're like, look how good I was back then. Look at how great everything was back then. And your mind's playing a trick on you when I only deal with my life in small increments now. I literally am an hour to hour person.
I'm like, and that's what's, that's what works for me. How great would it be if I'm saying this, saying all this right now, and then you find out tomorrow I killed myself in my hotel room, like I hung myself right off the balcony. I mean, wouldn't that be great? Well, I mean, honestly, for the podcast, it'd be incredible.
It would be the biggest number. You can take my data radio city. Just one for the guard. Sure.
No problem. So all that, because all that evolution that you're talking about happening, all of that led to you getting these glasses, basically. Literally, when I walked in, as soon as I walked in, the first thing Anthony said, he said, somebody's been intermittent fasting. Somebody's been off social media.
Somebody's not like a guy for doing a drawer that I keep these in and he just gave them to you. No, yeah, I don't like him because I feel like he would Tony like him Tony Tony Tony. I'll show you Tony has them. Oh, but not these exact ones.
Like my stepmom sent me a picture. She was like, look at your father from back in the day and he's got these. This is how he used to roll. So the reason why I got them initially is because I'm hosting a show for vice.
It's out now one vice. It's called a super maximum retro show. It's about like the 70s, 80s and 90s. Oh, perfect.
Dude, we pull up videos and stuff that shit that would have went viral back in the day. You know, but before the internet, like we're bringing it back like, you know, like, you know, crazy commercials, crazy things. Everybody had a full bush and I was like, love it. And Jimmy Kimmel's executive producer of it.
So I was going to do the Jimmy. I did the Jimmy Kimmel show and I was like, I want to look like a 70s, 80s mobster. Yeah. So I came with a turtleneck suit.
Oh, you look amazing. Yeah, I came out there and I was like, I need glasses. Like when I see all pictures of my dad and his friends, I always had shades on. So I was like, Oh, good guys, so great.
Are you kidding me? Great people and really, really nice guys fully vaccinated. And so, and so yeah. So I just came out like, you look like, you know, you look like like when a guy he did, like when the mobsters would do like, he did 15 years, but then he got a book deal.
Yeah. And they're making it into a movie. And they're like, this guy, he actually wacked like 13 people. Chris is definitely like, Hey, you know, I used to be a different guy.
Yeah. Well, that's because like my mother, you know, because my parents got the voice when I was one, but my mother was like, you know, you were so great on Jimmy Kimmel. He was so nice to see she's like, but I really, it was very tough for me to watch because you look exactly like what your father used to look like. And I really hate that guy.
I was like, I know, I know that guy was, but I was a fun guy. She's like, no, he wasn't. He sounded pretty fun. He was fun right before you didn't like him.
He's also on 45 pounds. He's still in Tampa area. Tamp. Dude, he, I told he moved to Tampa in the middle of the pandemic.
I didn't tell you I remember this where you were like, where are you? What are you doing? I live here. Yeah, look fucking, you know, just moved there.
Yeah. Right when COVID was out of tight. And, and he's been living there ever since. And he said, he said he likes living there because he likes walking in the pool.
He's like, you know, Christopher, every day I wake up, I put on my water shoes and I walk in the pool. And that's what keeps me in shape. I was like, all right, well, okay, dude, he's got water shoes that my dad's one of the only guys like he literally, he's so obsessed with these water shoes that I will have on like a $400 suit with water shoes. This use, I think I saw this clip on Instagram.
Yeah, that somebody I now I know somebody posted for you. But Brian Moore and AK Lancelot head Lancelot posted the clip of you talking about being out with your dad and you saw Steven Tyler. Oh my God. That was real dabbing his pizza.
Yeah. So we're at Joe's Pizza in the West Village. Great. You know, some of the best pizza New York and my dad, this was we were going to a Knicks game.
So this must have been I want to say early 2000s and stuff like that. So we're there, you know, hanging out, you know, eating pizza before we go take the train up to the game and Steven Tyler walks in and like everybody knows that that's Steven Tyler. Like from our Smith Stephen Tyler. Yeah.
And it's New York. So people like, Oh, shit, nobody's barding him. It's New York. So we see him and my dad's like, everyone's going crazy over this guy.
I was like, yes, Steven Tyler. He's like, I know who it is. What am I fucking asshole? I was like, kind of, but he was like, I know who it is.
I was like, okay. So then Steven gets his pizza with it, whatever's manager, whatever. And he starts, you know, take in napkin, and oily, blind, the oil off the pizza. And my dad goes, this fucking guy, he goes, no way he's from New York.
He's napkin, blind, oil off his pizza. I was like, Dad, it doesn't matter. It's like, he'll do what he wants to do. Like just let's eat the pizza.
Let's get to the game. He goes, I got to fucking say something to this guy. I was like, dad, please don't say anything to Steven Tyler. Like, please don't like literally like this.
It's not through the roof. I was like, it doesn't matter if he's napkin, blind, the oil off the pizza. Like let him have cholesterol issues. Who cares?
Yeah. And my dad goes, I got to say, he's like, it's such disrespect to do that in New York city. So I was like, okay, so my dad finishes the pizza, throws it out, and we're walking past him. I'm like, please don't say anything.
And my dad just walks past him, he goes, Hey, Bon Jovi, you don't need to napkin, block the oil off your pizza. And then Steve, I swear to God, I turned around and Steven had this slice like this far from his mouth, mouth open like that guy just called me Bon Jovi. And then I was like, Dad, he's from Harold Smith. He was like, same shit.
I was like, actually not. And then still to this day, I think Steven, I think my dad thinks Steven Tyler's a little bit of a bunch of other people. Sure, for sure. He does.
But if you showed him a picture, and said, no, it's Harold Smith, he'd be like, yeah, it's fine. Guys get the hair. Yeah. Yeah.
I tell you the Phil Collins, my dad Phil Collins story. No, my God. Okay. So you did tell me his got special needs.
Yeah, special needs. That's Yankee Stadium. Yeah, that one. Yeah, that one.
By the way, that I close with that story in my new hour special. And sometimes people like, you said that story on Sugura. I'm like, yeah, I said it in a different way. I'm doing it in stand up for my fucking dunce.
Yeah, of course. But just whatever you just deal with it. And so why don't deal with it anymore? Now fucking Brian and evil head deals with that.
I want to behead him. So just watch his dumb hair just flop into a basket. So so Phil Collins, right? So we're at an next.
This was recently, like I'm gonna say maybe three, four years ago, when a next game on Easter Sunday. Okay. So Easter Sunday, Nick's are not playing while they're playing against the Philadelphia 76 kind of both bottom of the, you know, Eastern Conference at the time. So you know how it is, you know, your New York, your entertainment, whatever, you can be on the list.
I was very low on the list, but I was on the list for to get courtside seats. Now it being Easter Sunday, it's like a one o'clock game that both teams suck. No real celebrities want to go to this game. So they go all the way down the list and they get to me Chrissy, they get to Chrissy day.
And he calls me that the header PR calls me out about 11 a.m. The games that want to go to listen. I got two courtside seats. Okay, you know, come down, bring the gas like get here now.
They're for you on the court. Great. Call my dad. Because you know, me and my dad used to go to next game to sit in the upper deck, talk shit about Bon Jovi like we, you know, we're living a different life now.
We don't have these glasses yet, but we're getting close. We're getting close. We're getting there. So I have two 23 to 24.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I would say about that.
Yeah. So call my dad and I was like, dad, you know, like next game, whatever, like, you know, we're gonna go like on the court. I said, you know, the guy told me though, like, you know, it's the first time every day on there, like there's a most likely be major celebrities there. So don't say anything.
We can't talk to anybody and you have to like dress kind of nice. Like, you know, it's it's courtside. And I swear to God, my dad's a niche response. He goes, I'll go with you.
He goes, but let me tell you something. I'll do whatever the fuck I want to do. Just know that I was like, okay. So know that.
So my dad, I swear he comes again. He comes shows up at my door. We don't live too far from each other back then. He's wearing a Patrick Ewing, Nick's jersey with a suit jacket, sweatpants, water shoes.
No, no water shoes. He's wearing he's wearing a New York, Nick's Patrick Ewing jersey with a suit jacket. I was like, you know, blazer. Yeah, I was like, you look like a fucking make a wish like you and sweatpants.
And that's that's just my dad. He will always wear if you ever see my dad in a suit jacket, he always has sweats on. And that's just how we roll. Some of them don't look exactly it's not like they're bugle boys, but they were sweatpants material.