Codependency: The CLINGER Attachment Personality Pattern

There’s a funny portrayal of the clinger personality in the movie Wedding Crashers. The lead character attracts the affection of a young woman who comes on strong and never stops. She throws herself at him, uses her sexuality to enchant him, and demands her be a couple with her. The funny thing is, at the end of the movie, he realizes she really is the one even though for the first ¾ of their forced one sided relationship, he’s trying to escape her. Such is the desperate reputation of Clingers: “One day, you will realize how much you love me and never leave me. And I’ll do anything to make that happen.” In other movies, like Single White Female and Fatal Attraction, clingers are portrayed as dangerous, loose cannons, waiting to kill you should you have the audacity to reject them. Such is the bad reputation of the Clinger: I’ll get you or I’ll get you back. It’s all very black and white in those two depictions. But there is a gray area where people display an unhealthy attachment style that’s not so dramatic but perhaps equally as disturbing to the Clinger him/herself or the recipient. Before we begin, what is an APP or Attachment Personality Pattern? When you're born into a family of dysfunction, one that is toxic, abusive, addicted, or alcoholic, you find a way to function in that dysfunction. You end up trying to find a way to survive, thrive, connect, or cope in that family of origin. And I call those attachment personality patterns. Essentially, they’re a form of codependency. It’s important to remember, patterns are not pathology. Your personality is not fixed. You’re not the same person today as you were yesterday from the personality standpoint. These patterns can be interrupted and replaced with healthier ways of relating. Let’s get into the 5 core traits of a Clinger Attachment Personality Pattern. Please like and subscribe if you find the channel useful to you. If you want more help or to schedule a consultation, please visit www.LoveCoachHeidi.Com